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Thursday, October 16, 2008

Does My Eyeball Look Fucked Up to You Guys?

posted by on October 16 at 17:29 PM

Dudes, I think something’s up with my right eyeball:


Doesn’t it look red? Eli Sanders says I’m being ridiculous. To compare, here’s my perfectly normal left eyeball:


The more I think about it, the more I feel a slight burning coming on. But is it all just in my mind? Or do I seriously have a fucked-up red eyeball!?

RSS icon Comments


Slow news day?

Posted by Lenny | October 16, 2008 5:32 PM

hmm, looks a little redder than the other. pretty eyes, btw.

Posted by brad | October 16, 2008 5:33 PM

Remember that scene in "Knocked Up" ?

Posted by John Bailo | October 16, 2008 5:34 PM

Are you stoned at work again?

Posted by narc | October 16, 2008 5:35 PM

Yeah, it looks a little fucked up. Probably not seriously. Don't panic!

Posted by Superfrankenstein | October 16, 2008 5:35 PM

You're probably going blind. Stop masturbating!

Posted by Providence | October 16, 2008 5:36 PM

Clearly your RIGHT eye is viewing the world through a rose colored lens.

Posted by nightlifejitters | October 16, 2008 5:38 PM


Posted by catnextdoor | October 16, 2008 5:39 PM

I once had one eye get way red compared the other. Turns out some grass pollen was making my left eye all poofy. I went to the ER only to find out that I'm allergic to grass (I didn't know!) Well, my left eye is allergic, anyway.

Try rinsing it out with water. That's what the docs did and all was well.

Posted by Jesse | October 16, 2008 5:44 PM

Yeah, I'd get that looked at... I get bouts of iritis, only ever in one eye at a time. I know it's coming on when the eye feels sort of bruised and swollen and looks bloodshot.

Posted by banjoboy | October 16, 2008 5:46 PM

Conjunctivitis. For sure.

Or, once an acquaintance got herpes in her eye. It sounded really gross. So maybe it's that.

Posted by Aislinn | October 16, 2008 5:46 PM

My cat had the same thing. The vet said it was chlamydia. You should really have that checked out. Don't touch your privates without first washing your hand.

Posted by steve cats | October 16, 2008 5:48 PM

pinkeye. fo sho.

Posted by disintegrator | October 16, 2008 5:49 PM

is your right eye stoned? it might be time for an intervention.

Posted by luna.sea | October 16, 2008 5:50 PM

I've been very light sensitive today. Do you think anything is wrong with my eye?

Posted by Mahtli69 | October 16, 2008 5:52 PM

if you wear contacts and your contacts get filthy it could be a corneal infection.

Posted by paul | October 16, 2008 5:53 PM

You have pretty eyes, Lindy. Well, outside of whatever the hell you have.

Posted by Gloria | October 16, 2008 5:54 PM

Could be from rubbing your eye, dust, pollen, or any number of irritants. Take some Benadryl and sleep on it. Doesn't look serious. Go to urgent care it it starts getting matted or prurulent.

Posted by Beth RN | October 16, 2008 5:57 PM

This happened to me once as a result of wiping my eye after handling raw chicken. It was itchy and unpleasant, but went away after a few days with no lingering effects.

Posted by meh | October 16, 2008 5:57 PM

Better go to the ER just to be sure. Also I LOVE reflections in peoples eyes. There's something incredibly poetic about it. I wonder if those are the office windows above the bicycle shop...

Posted by Alex S | October 16, 2008 5:57 PM

Pink Eye!! You will try to convince yourself that it doesn't burn or itch (no, it can't be pink eye, it can't!), but, you will be lying to yourself.

If you wake up tomorrow with a crusty eyeball, I'm going to say I told you so.

Posted by Julie in Chicago | October 16, 2008 6:00 PM

This happened to me a while ago only it lasted for a couple weeks. I kept examining my eye, but couldn't find anything wrong. Finally I went to the eye doctor and it turns out that a tiny piece of thread had somehow become wedged deep in my eye. He had to numb my eye, and pull it out with tweezers.

Posted by Ashley | October 16, 2008 6:03 PM

Your eyess don't look infected but I have to ask. Have you taken any recent trips to Malton or Monroeville?

Posted by Chuy Harmans | October 16, 2008 6:06 PM

Nice pics. Did you take those with a phone camera or a digital camera? It's hard to get good close-ups like that.

Posted by idaho | October 16, 2008 6:14 PM

throw some visine on it, buy a bag of dorritos, and chilllllll. seriously. you'll be fine.

Posted by Jo Spot | October 16, 2008 6:23 PM

Ahh, nothing like Thursday at the Slog.

Posted by w7ngman | October 16, 2008 6:26 PM

eye cancer

Posted by DJSauvage | October 16, 2008 6:27 PM

Go with Beth.

Posted by Dean Venture | October 16, 2008 6:30 PM

Hot compress - washcloth or such, almost hot as you can stand it, several applications as you wind down your night. Should clear things up, and no co-pay.

Posted by eye | October 16, 2008 6:33 PM

my eyes are always more red than this.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | October 16, 2008 6:34 PM

These eyes cry every night for you.
These arms long to hold you again.
The hurtin’s on me yeah,
But I will never be free no my baby, no no.
You gave a promise to me yeah and you broke it, you broke it. Oh, no.

These eyes watched you bring my world to an end.
This heart could not accept and pretend.
The hurtin’s on me yeah,
But I will never be free no no no.
You took the vow with me yeah.
You spoke it, you spoke it, babe.

These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.
These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.

These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.

These eyes cry every night for you.
These arms, these arms long to hold you, hold you again.
These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.
These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.
These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.
These eyes are cryin’
These eyes have seen a lot of loves
But they’re never gonna see another one like I had with you.
Baby, baby, baby, baby.

Posted by The Guess Who | October 16, 2008 6:35 PM

Pinkeye, for sure. Or eye cancer. Possibly hypercontagious airborne eye cancer, which will render you and everyone you know blind, just like that crappy movie.

Posted by el ganador | October 16, 2008 6:54 PM

Im all out of hope
One more bad dream could bring a fall
When Im far from home
Dont call me on the phone
To tell me youre alone
Its easy to deceive
Its easy to tease
But hard to get release

eyes without a face
eyes without a face
eyes without a face
Got no human grace your eyes without a face.

I spend so much time
Believing all the lies
To keep the dream alive
Now it makes me sad
It makes me mad at truth
For loving what was you

eyes without a face
eyes without a face
eyes without a face
Got no human grace your eyes without a face.

When you hear the music you make a dip
Into someone elses pocket then make a slip.
Steal a car and go to las vegas oh, the gigolo pool.
Hanging out by the state line,
Turning holy water into wine
Drinkin it down
Im on a bus on a psychedelic trip
Reading murder books tryin to stay hip.
Im thinkin of you youre out there so
Say your prayers.
Say your prayers.
Say your prayers.

Now I close my eyes
And I wonder why
I dont despise
Now all I can do
Is love what was once
So alive and new
But its gone from your eyes
Id better realise

eyes without a face
eyes without a face
eyes without a face
Got no human grace your eyes without a face.
Such a human waste your eyes without a face
And now its getting worse.

Posted by Billy Idol | October 16, 2008 6:55 PM

It's probably a little conjunctivitis, or "pink eye". Go to a doctor or clinic and get some drops.
It's highly contagious so do it before it spreads to the other eye.
It's a bother but not serious.

Posted by jean genie | October 16, 2008 7:58 PM

On the other hand, if it doesn't feel itchy it may just be eye strain. I look that way after too many hours looking at a screen.

Posted by wench | October 16, 2008 7:59 PM

Too much pot or pink eye (horse sh*t conjunctivitis).

Posted by daytrpr | October 16, 2008 8:37 PM

Anxiety. Sigh.

Posted by Sean | October 16, 2008 9:01 PM

Did you get some cum in your eye? I've had that happen

Posted by Pervy Perv | October 16, 2008 9:05 PM

Looks like pinkeye to me. I had it and it spreads like crazy to the other eye & then even back again. Felt like I had a piece of sand in my eye that I couldn't get out. I'd rather vomit and shit blood at the same time than go thru that again. If it starts to feel like there's something in your eye, but there's not... get your blue-eye'd ass to the doctor pronto beautiful.

Posted by Shawn | October 16, 2008 9:28 PM

sucka please, my eyes are 4X as red most days. Work at a computer screen for 15 hours a couple days in a row... you'll get the picture.

Posted by nosleep | October 16, 2008 10:05 PM

Every few years or so my eyes will get sore and I'll wake up with gunk covering them so I can barely open them. (I know, you didn't want to know.) But it always goes away in a few days with no lingering effects. I get yearly check-ups cause I need glasses, so I know my eyes are healthy (except for the poor vision). Just rinse them twice a day until they feel fine. Unless it doesn't go away in 3 days, then see a doc.

Posted by Enigma | October 16, 2008 10:10 PM

@36: Pink eye *is* conjunctivitis, dumbass.

Posted by TVDinner | October 16, 2008 10:21 PM

You have beautiful eyes, Lindy. My suspicion: that the real reason for this post is you wanted to show them off

Posted by Kris | October 16, 2008 10:32 PM

Tend to that pronto.
Must interfere awfully with your navel gazing.

Posted by PC | October 16, 2008 11:02 PM

If it's allergies, there are antihistamine eye drops available over the counter now. Naphcon-A, etc.

Will provide symptom relief, but get it checked out if no improvement in a couple of days.

Posted by David B. | October 16, 2008 11:12 PM

Oh, shit. Girl, that's going to have to come out.

Posted by Fnarf | October 16, 2008 11:26 PM

is your body temperature dropping to room temperature? Do you crave brains and have slow respiration?

Posted by DJ Eternal Darkness | October 17, 2008 12:34 AM

death will occur in 48 to 825 hours.

Posted by 555 | October 17, 2008 1:05 AM

Premature strabismus.

Posted by RHETT ORACLE | October 17, 2008 1:07 AM

i agree with paul @ 16. My eye looked very much the same and after trying to treat it with over the counter eye drops for weeks, i went to the doc and it turns out i had a corneal infection. go to an optometrist! better safe than sorry.

Posted by Jill | October 17, 2008 6:03 AM

Seriously? My eyes look like that after I rub them (I have allergies). That's nothin'. If it gets worse unprovoked, look it up on WebMD. Til then, take a nap. It'll probably go away.

Posted by precipice | October 17, 2008 6:20 AM

MATT 18:9

And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: it is better for thee to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire.

A tablespoon and a quick motion will resolve this

Posted by Joe Frilly _Panties | October 17, 2008 7:38 AM

The first night I spent at my ex-girlfriend's house, I totally got pink eye. I probably should have dumped her then, but hey- at least it wasn't the herp hiv or hep!

Posted by ray | October 17, 2008 8:22 AM

Elaphantitis for sure. Those are some big ass eyes!

Posted by Vince | October 17, 2008 8:48 AM

If light is hurting your eyes, you may have iritis.

If it just feels a little "hot," like you've been at the beach all day, it's probably viral conjunctivitis which you can't do anything about. You'll maybe see a little crusting in the mornings, etc.

Bacterial conjunctivitis hurts so much you'd already be in the hospital. So it's probably not that, or it's just starting.

It's not likely to be allergic conjunctivitis, since it's only affecting one eye.

Do not waste your time in the fucking emergency room if your vision is basically the same and it's not getting worse.

Posted by Yeek | October 17, 2008 9:02 AM

Go to a doctor. You probably have conjunctivitis.

Posted by Greg | October 17, 2008 9:52 AM

You have teh AIDS.

Posted by violet_dagrinder | October 17, 2008 10:04 AM

Lindy, I would please like to rub my penis against your eye, thank you.

Posted by jim bexley-speed | October 17, 2008 10:31 AM

I've read it all, it's black and white
The spectrum made a shade I like.
The crimson rays are ruby bright
Technicolor light.

Red! I want red, there's no substitute for red.
Red! Paint it red, green ain't mean compared to red.

You don't know what it does to me,
My crimson intensity
I'm haunted by the mystery,
The mystery of red.
Red knocks 'em dead,
Some like it hot, I like it red.

Red is my lover, got it covered
Red is my number, sure as a coma
Red is my drummer, and I hear red thunder
Move over brother,
Red's a motherfucker
(Red! Red!)
That's what I said
(Red! Red!)
Come on to bed
(Red! Red!)
Gimme that expensive spread

Posted by Sammy Hagar | October 17, 2008 10:42 AM

I remember reading a few years ago about a zoo worker that got chimpanzee poop thrown at her (they do that, I guess) and a little tiny bit got into the corner of her eye, and she got some rare disease from it and died. I can't find a link offhand, but it doesn't matter since that's clearly not what you've got.

Posted by onewink3 | October 17, 2008 11:27 AM

What the fuck? Does the Stranger not offer health insurance? Take your eyeball to a doctor, not the internet.

Posted by Jesse | October 17, 2008 1:16 PM

Does anyone else find it disconcerting the fact that shes trolling an internet blog for a diagnosis??
Clearly you have a very serious infection and if this were an episode of HOUSE it would also mean that you are a lying piece of shit bent on hiding something from the people who love you and you have approximately 45 min to live.

Posted by drone5969 | October 17, 2008 5:30 PM

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