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Thursday, September 11, 2008

While Everyone’s Obsessing About that Superconductor Whatever Creating a Black Hole and Ending Life as We Know It…

posted by on September 11 at 16:30 PM

…Sarah Palin is threatening to take us to war with Russia. Because, you see, we’re all Georgians now, or some such shit, and Palin learned all about Russia and foreign policy and stuff by osmosis, pretty much like Paul Constant is getting diabetes through osmosis right now because I left that cake from Babeland sitting on table behind his desk.

Anyway, war with Russia—neat!

So, um, how would we feel if Russia formed a strategic alliance with, say, Cuba, and maybe put some missiles, or maybe a missile-shield system, on that island? Or in Panama? Or Venezuela? Or Greenland? Or Mexico? I realize Russia is a piece-of-shit, crypto-fascist oil state run by a bunch of thugs, but don’t they get to have “zone of influence” just like we do? Do we really want to run NATO right up to their borders and dare ‘em to fire the first shot? Can’t we all just get along?

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I'm refraining from saying what I'd really like to say b/c I'm fearful of the secret service knocking down my door and shooting my dog.

I will, however, express my extreme displeasure in Governor Palin's warmongering and also say that I feel that she's an extremely dangerous choice for VP. That is all.

Posted by Balt-O-Matt | September 11, 2008 4:37 PM

I work with doctors and my aunt is a midwife. Therefore, I would be happy to deliver her grandbaby.

That is all.

Posted by exelizabeth | September 11, 2008 4:38 PM

Since she lives right there next to Russia, can she be the first to go?

Posted by Ziggity | September 11, 2008 4:38 PM

Russia just sent two bombers to Venezuela.

Bay of Pigs with Lipstick?

Posted by John Bailo | September 11, 2008 4:39 PM

McCain's gaffe today was almost worse, and that is hard to believe. This is getting otherworldly...

Posted by ZWBush | September 11, 2008 4:43 PM

This dumb cunt needs to be kept as far away from the button as possible.

Posted by AMB | September 11, 2008 4:45 PM

This isn't much a point to debate, unfortunately, since Obama's for bringing Georgia into NATO, too. But that's only if you want to be fair, which I don't anymore, so yeah, she's a saber rattlin' war monger who'll get us all killed!

Posted by spencer | September 11, 2008 4:48 PM


So, who'd like to tell me to ignore psychopathic Christofascist Ayatollah Sarah "Talibunny" Palin now?

Posted by Original Andrew | September 11, 2008 4:48 PM

How funny would it be if President Palin's first foreign policy action caused her home state to go back to the Russkies?

Posted by Mahtli69 | September 11, 2008 4:50 PM

The Russian situation is complicated. Putin sent bombers to Venezuela and is thinking of doing joint Navy exercises there next month. Putin is acting aggressively, as this quote from him illustrates:

"What did you want us to do? Wave our penknives in the air and wipe the bloody snot off our noses?" he asked, adding: "When an aggressor comes into your territory, you need to punch him in the face - an aggressor needs to punished."

What that signals over the next year for the US remains to be seen. Palin's sound bite is easy to get hysterical about, but Russia is going to be an issue.

Posted by PopTart | September 11, 2008 4:52 PM

Which reminds me: Move your damn cake, Savage.

Posted by Paul Constant | September 11, 2008 4:53 PM

Dan, it's (unfortunately) true that Obama also wants to offer Georgia NATO membership. Either...

(1) his position is identical to hers, or
(2) he wants to offer them NATO membership without offering them the military umbrella that NATO has always offered.

Neither option produces a win for us as Obama supporters.

Posted by Big Sven | September 11, 2008 4:55 PM

McSame: "she knows more about energy than probably anyone else in the United States of America"

Oh really? I'm sure that will a surprise to tens of thousands of oil company executives, geologists, and rig hands, nuclear power plant engineers, hydro dam operators, solar and wind power developers, et al.

I think McSame is the real cunt here...

Posted by COMTE | September 11, 2008 5:00 PM

NATO exists for mutual benefit, not charity. Its hard for me to see what Georgia brings us in extra security.

Love the peaches and pecans though.

Posted by Mikeblanco | September 11, 2008 5:03 PM

Hot and cold running wars: Hot War in Iran, as soon as possible, and Cold War with Russia starting now. The McCain campaign is not being particularly subtle with its message that this is what we can expect if we vote for them.

These people are running on a platform of war and economic collapse. The fact that we're arguing about what "lipstick on a pig" means while this is happening shows just how complete the bubble of reality-denial has become for most Americans.

The Bush administration has spent us into bankruptcy by cutting taxes while starting two wars, and the McCain plan is to double-down. There is exactly zero chance that this will end well.

Posted by flamingbanjo | September 11, 2008 5:06 PM

I loved her hair! And that outfit was very nice. I wonder if she bought it at Target.

She's got so much spunk. I just love her. She's one of us! I'm still laughing about how she sold that airplane on eBay. I guess she showed those fatcats!

It will be great to have her in the White House! I'm praying that God will look after her son in the War on Terror....

Posted by Stupid Middle-Class Woman | September 11, 2008 5:14 PM

russia is not iraq and our humvees are not going to be parading down Gorki avenue in Moscow any time soon. even condie has second thoughts about our blind support for the "democratic" georgian prez.
lets be clear,war with Russia is pretty much the end of the world: Nukes.
we bomb Moscow, they bomb Seattle. we Bomb St Petersburgh, they bomb Tacoma. war with russia will be felt here. this lady does not know what she is talking about.

i agree with dan, when he says, "Russia is a piece-of-shit, crypto-fascist oil state run by a bunch of thugs " but other than the low oild production how is that different from our own blackwater-haliburton runned goverment?

Posted by SeMe | September 11, 2008 5:16 PM

If you think Dick Cheney went to Georgia to deliver humanitarian aid, you haven't been paying attention.

The US is seeking a new cold war with Russia. But since we can't admit it, we blame Russia anytime they say anything mildly provocative.

Posted by Trevor | September 11, 2008 5:33 PM

"Do we really want to run NATO right up to their borders and dare ‘em to fire the first shot?"

Hi! We're Harry Truman and Bill Clinton. We already did this when we let in Norway in 1949, Turkey in 1952 (ok, it was the Soviet Union, not Russia...same thing then) and Poland in 1999. But we weren't Republicans so that was OK.

Posted by mpc | September 11, 2008 5:33 PM

sarah, shug: no one's going to war with russia. they have real, functioning nucular missiles, remember? they're not one of the pissant countries we throw up against the wall every decade just so we can get a national hard on.

Posted by max solomon | September 11, 2008 5:38 PM

Wouldn't it be hilarious if Obama got us all killed by bringing Ukraine and Georgia into NATO, instead of McCain and Palin getting us all killed by bringing Ukraine and Georgia into NATO?

I mean, hilarious? Really something for the end of year "Regrets" issue?

Posted by RonK, Seattle | September 11, 2008 5:41 PM

The collider is covered by

So maybe we need a

Duck and cover, motherfuckers!

Posted by Ryan | September 11, 2008 5:44 PM

I see a crazy person in that video, her name is Sarah Palin, so that makes me her mental therapist. She's beyond my help, she keeps thinking she sees Russia, when really it's Canada. She's crazy, people!

Posted by Deacon Seattle | September 11, 2008 6:30 PM

Quick! Who said the following?

"Ukraine and Georgia have also been developing their ties with NATO. Their leaders have declared their readiness to advance a NATO Membership Action Plan, MAP, to prepare for the rights and obligations of membership. They are working to consolidate democratic reforms and to undertake new responsibilities in their relationship with the Alliance. I welcome the desire and actions of these countries to seek closer ties with NATO and hope that NATO responds favorably to their request, consistent with its criteria for membership."

Posted by mpc | September 11, 2008 6:40 PM

Hey, Dan, I'm just afraid at the thought of going to war with Russia as you are. Due to lack of money, interest, power, and plain old intestinal fortitude, we may very well abandon the developing democracies on Russia's borders. But don't couch that Realpolitik as some sort of liberal-internationalist moral superiority based on some fantasy of moral equivilence. That's delusional.

(Oh, and if this wasn't about an actual conviction you have, but just you rummaging about for some issue with which to beat on McCain/Palin, you're going to run into the little problem that Obama has taken the same stand, as other commenters have pointed out.)

Posted by David Wright | September 11, 2008 6:55 PM

The thought of Sarah Palin with the nuclear codes scares me more than just about anything I can imagine.

Posted by Reverse Polarity | September 11, 2008 7:35 PM

By my count, in that five minute interview, she said she would put us in 3 different wars on top of Iraq:

1) She would allow Georgia into NATO, and we would go to their aid if Russia attacked again.
2) We would back Isreal if they felt they needed to attack Iran.
3) We would attack Pakistan if we felt it was necessary to protect ourselves from Islamic extremeists.

Sarah Palin, we who are about to die salute you.

Posted by ferretrick | September 11, 2008 8:20 PM

I feel like I'm shouting in a sound proof room. Russia is an issue. Russia is making itself an issue. Russia. Bombers. Venezuela.

Chavez promises a friendly fly by to Castro. Oh, and for extra bonus points, recalls his ambassador to the US and expels the "Yankee ambassador" from Venezuela.

In answer to your question, Dan, no apparently we can't all just get along.

Posted by PopTart | September 11, 2008 9:45 PM

Might I add that war with Russia is a bad idea because you guys suck at "precision bombing" and you'll probably fry half of Europe in the process. Or Russia will take revenge on the US by bombing us. Whatever.
Which would be... totally unfair seeing as we've been bombed and rebuilt twice in the past century already and we're quite sick of it. (and as someone living in "Flanders Fields" I'd like to add that we don't have any more room for more soldiers' graves... just go to one of those cemeteries and *then* think about starting another war)

Posted by Griet | September 11, 2008 10:40 PM

Let's just throw her in the Bearing Straight. She shoots Mooses, she can handle it.

Posted by fruc it all | September 12, 2008 1:09 AM

Its going to be really funny if in 3 years we all are like "man, wish we still had bush in office."

Er wait that's not funny

Posted by shane | September 12, 2008 7:56 AM

If we didn't go to war with Russia in the 1950's or 60's, we're not now.

Dumb cunt or not.

Posted by GK | September 12, 2008 9:57 AM

Talibunny! Talibunny! Sis-boom-bah!

Talibunny! Talibunny! Rah-rah-rah!

Posted by Fear The Talibunny | September 13, 2008 10:56 AM

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