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Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Two Sequels to Surprisingly Good Movies

posted by on September 2 at 13:00 PM

The, um, geniuses who brought us Crank are currently making Crank 2. I have to say, I really appreciated Crank, in which Jason Statham had to do all kinds of stupid things to keep his adrenaline running, or he would die. It was stupid and funny and, you know, an action movie. But the ending was, how do you say, not entirely conducive to a sequel. Still: if they title this movie Crank 2: Stupider! and make it about 48 minutes long, I will totally buy a ticket on opening weekend.

And in more depressing news, someone—not the original director—is making The Descent 2. The Descent was the scariest movie I’ve ever seen in a movie theater. I hear that it doesn’t hold up on DVD—there was something special about watching a horror movie about spelunking in a cool, cavernous dark theater—but a sequel is a horrible idea. At least it’s not a remake, I guess.

RSS icon Comments

1

Paul you may know books, but you don't know movies. Crank was all loud noises and shakycam, it was the cinematic equivalent of baking an eating a pinata.

Posted by Dave M | September 2, 2008 1:05 PM
2

doesn't everyone die in the descent? there's no character overlap that would make any sense. so, basically what we're talking about here is a remake not a sequel.

Posted by douglas | September 2, 2008 1:16 PM
3

Dave M, I don't know if you know anything about anything, but you don't good movies.

Crank was awesome and funny as hell.

Posted by PdxRitchie | September 2, 2008 1:23 PM
4

Crank was gratuitous and vile, but I found myself unable to avert my eyes as the improbabilities and offenses against reason and decency kept piling up like cars in a freeway accident. Especially that scene where he rapes his girlfriend in front of a crowd of cheering onlookers and a bus of Japanese tourists, but it turns out to be okay because partway through she decides she's into it.

It's the kind of movie that makes you want to take a shower afterwards.

Posted by flamingbanjo | September 2, 2008 1:32 PM
5

I had to turn off Crank when he started raping his girlfriend in front of a cheering crowd. Yes, I realize she "ended up liking it" (aren't most rape victims "asking for it" anyway?). But don't try to tell me that scene didn't start out as rape. She said no.

As far as mindless action movies go, there's far better fare out there.

Posted by T | September 2, 2008 1:36 PM
6

@5: Oh, I'm right there with you on what that scene was about. I kept watching as a sort of perverse "what kind of universe does this movie exist in where this sort of thing is okay? What the hell?" interest, I guess.

If it makes you feel better, Statham's character falls from a great height and is crushed into pulp in the last shot of the movie. Which makes the idea of a sequel problematic, but since the logic of Crank is pure bizarro-world lunacy, I'm sure they'll figure out a suitably incongruous explanation to have Statham up and commiting atrocities against narrative cohesion and common decency again.

Posted by flamingbanjo | September 2, 2008 2:02 PM
7

I guess you haven't heard; Todd Solondz is working on a sequel/companion piece to Happiness...

Posted by michael strangeways | September 2, 2008 2:12 PM
8

I only saw The Descent on DVD, and it was totally scary and awesome.

Posted by Levislade | September 2, 2008 3:27 PM
9

Couldn't get my suspension of disbelief going on enough to go to Crank. Kept thinking why on earth would he have to do anything to *keep* his adrenalin up? Just knowing that if it went below whatever should freak him out enough that it would go right back up again.

Posted by amazonmidwife | September 2, 2008 3:29 PM
10

Personally, I found both Crank and Descent underwhelming.

Give me Leave Her To Heaven or The Girl Who Leapt Through Time any day.

Posted by Will in Seattle | September 2, 2008 4:47 PM
11

@10 You should have mentioned that The Girl Who Leapt Through Time is itself a sequel!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Girl_Who_Leapt_Through_Time

Posted by RL | September 2, 2008 10:38 PM

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