Slog - Comments on The Children Are Our Future (We're Fucked) http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked The other day, I found myself--for the first time in years--inside a community center, a place where babies gather to engage in art projects and table tennis and psychological warfare. In the main hallway, I noticed that some enterprising and earnest babies had constructed a large wire dome, on which they had pinned an army of colorful felt homunculi and a bunch of note cards. Each note card bore one baby's vision for the future of earth. I know you guys think that Sarah Palin and John McCain are scary, but check out what these fuckin' babies have in store... Copyright 2008 Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:45:08 -0800 Thu, 11 Sep 2008 10:59:21 -0800 http://www.movabletype.org/?v=3.34 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Comment by Southerner I wish none of these kids was born.

]]> Southerner http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136322 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136322 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:49:54 -0800 Comment by NapoleonXIV If you'd support the plastic bag tax repeal, there'd be more lying around for the babies to play in, Lindy.

]]> NapoleonXIV http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136325 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136325 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:50:23 -0800 Comment by Will in STL Best post ever.

]]> Will in STL http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136327 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136327 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:50:48 -0800 Comment by Skip Stupid, stupid babies.

]]> Skip http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136335 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136335 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:53:50 -0800 Comment by Steagle Why do all babies have the same handwriting?

]]> Steagle http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136341 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136341 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 14:55:35 -0800 Comment by Ziggity More homos = fewer babies.

]]> Ziggity http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136355 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136355 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:00:47 -0800 Comment by Hernandez @4 Stupid babies need the most attention!

]]> Hernandez http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136365 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136365 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:06:17 -0800 Comment by Abby When I was a baby, I wanted to be a seal when I grew up.

]]> Abby http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136413 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136413 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:22:59 -0800 Comment by Josie This post blows. It's a poor rip off of this:

"Crappy Children's Art"
http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=irule2

Try again. Try originality.

]]> Josie http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136425 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136425 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:24:33 -0800 Comment by mge Children have been our future for far too long.

]]> mge http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136474 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136474 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:29:09 -0800 Comment by Jiberish you should write more!

]]> Jiberish http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136628 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136628 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:40:25 -0800 Comment by CommonKnowledge
Animals can't celebrate holidays because we eat animals on holidays.

At least they are forcing the babies to do haiku.

]]> CommonKnowledge http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136731 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136731 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:50:43 -0800 Comment by babyjesus@heaven.com I do not approve the message of these other babies. They sound like pagan/vegan pansy ass wimps, they do not understand the threat animals are to babykind, and that animals must be destroyed, if only 'cause they try to steal attention from us babies, and that cannot stand.

]]> babyjesus@heaven.com http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136775 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136775 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:55:31 -0800 Comment by Nick Lindy, I've developed a crush on your humor and writing from your column in the Stranger. This is only encouraging it.

]]> Nick http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136807 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136807 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 15:58:40 -0800 Comment by michael strangeways I've seen babies suck the life out of cats...FACT!

]]> michael strangeways http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136833 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136833 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:02:03 -0800 Comment by Darcy @14: Seconded. Lindy West is one of my favorite things about The Stranger.

]]> Darcy http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136951 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1136951 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:17:54 -0800 Comment by sassafrass expert LINDY WEST, IF WE HAD BABIES TOGETHER, WE COULD MAKE FUN OF THEM FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES. XOXO

]]> sassafrass expert http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137034 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137034 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:32:11 -0800 Comment by inkweary Do the babies live in the wire dome? Isn't that usually called a cage?

]]> inkweary http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137058 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137058 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:36:22 -0800 Comment by max solomon i assume these babies know that cougars sit on the edge of the woods outside playgrounds in the far eastside suburbs & watch the kids all day long.

]]> max solomon http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137062 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137062 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:36:46 -0800 Comment by sleestak Baby #3 clearly just made a typo. I'm pretty sure there's supposed to be a "delicious" between "more" and "animals".

]]> sleestak http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137086 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137086 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:40:50 -0800 Comment by Super Jesse My pathetic rationale for these wishes:

#1 - Child is a habitual cat tail breaker, wonders why the cat runs for the hills whenever he's around.

#2 - Child has plans to build spider-like powered exoskeleton to terrorize grown-ups, realizes that he wouldn't get close enough since people already avoid spiders as it is. Watch out for this little fucker.

#3 - Child is a selfish anti-social asshole whose only friends are choo-choo the goldfish and brambles the hamster. What a loser.

#4 - Future hacky sack pro

#5 - This kids family dog is habitually underfed and malnourished and begs like a junkie for turkey/hot dogs on thanksgiving/july 4th and is left to pout it out under the porch. They feed the leftovers to the piranha, hence the wish for "all" animals.

]]> Super Jesse http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137157 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137157 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:56:23 -0800 Comment by purple Not only do I have a crush on your cool name, Lindy, I freaking LOLed at my computer because of what you wrote. Good stuff... definitely write more.

]]> purple http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137409 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137409 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 18:24:57 -0800 Comment by joey i too wish seals could share their feelings. thx for this lindy.

]]> joey http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137551 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137551 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 19:29:14 -0800 Comment by sepiolida @9 - couldn't stop laughing at the firetruck one.

]]> sepiolida http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137599 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137599 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 19:52:00 -0800 Comment by CattyMaran ok. I'm seriously not playing dumb here. Why are we calling children babies? Clearly these aren't babies. Call me dumb if you want- but I don't get why it's funny?

]]> CattyMaran http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137632 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137632 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 20:04:18 -0800 Comment by dc That was fucking funny. Thank you.

]]> dc http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137957 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1137957 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:23:10 -0800 Comment by Will in Seattle Plastic bags are the FSM's way of saying No to Baby Rule.

]]> Will in Seattle http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138061 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138061 ??!! Wed, 10 Sep 2008 23:13:45 -0800 Comment by Erik Is there a reason all the notes are written in the same handwriting?

]]> Erik http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138408 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138408 ??!! Thu, 11 Sep 2008 06:43:24 -0800 Comment by jared wow i'm gonna have to post a link to this article later today. I just started a site chronicling what i believe is the beginning of the great human/animal war. from what i read here, it sounds like you might believe me.

]]> jared http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138557 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138557 ??!! Thu, 11 Sep 2008 08:59:19 -0800 Comment by Cate I'm going to go ahead and assume that the reason it's all in the same handwriting is because the babies, in conjunction with being little monsters who want to eat our faces, aren't too hot with the letters. Is it so hard to imagine a driving force behind this project, excising these deep dark desires from our future leaders?

]]> Cate http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138808 http://slog.thestranger.com/2008/09/the_children_are_our_future_were_fucked#c1138808 ??!! Thu, 11 Sep 2008 10:59:21 -0800