Enviro Sometimes Helping the Environment Looks Stupid as Poop
posted by August 27 at 10:13 AMon
I first had to deal with the fact in the subject line when I began sporadically riding a scooter. With the big round helmet on my big round head, perched on a shrimpy little scooter (that nevertheless can reach 65 MPH on the freeway), I look, quite literally, retarded. (If I don’t quite look like a legitimately developmentally disabled person, I at least look like I’m playing one in a movie.)
Things get more acute with addition of my fella Jake, who occasionally “rides bitch.” When the two of us are straddling that poor little scooter, I can’t help thinking of the world’s fattest twins crammed onto one wee bike. Passersby laugh at us. We understand, and laugh with them, for it is ridiculous. We call the scooter “My Gassy L’il Pony,” or, alternately, the Dignity Mobile. These are the sacrifices you make during a gas crisis/environmental emergency.
I tell you all this en route to reporting something I saw this past Saturday at University Village. In the parking lot, I watched as two of those couldn’t-be-tinier Smart Cars pulled in and parked right next to each other.
Out of each teensy car emerged one plus-sized person—one large man, one large woman, who walked away holding hands.
It was strangely sweet, despite the vague WALL•E vibe…
Anyway, if you see me out-and-about on a scooter, feel free to point and laugh. It’s for the environment.