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Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Lunchtime Quickie, Now With a Gallon of Lube

posted by on June 18 at 13:15 PM

A couple weeks ago I went down to Portland for The 7th Annual Masturbate-a-Thon. The event promised dancing girls, comedians, jugglers, trannies, porn stars, a tarot card reader, fellatio demos, The Thrill Hammer, and last, but certainly not least, a play-space called “The Rubitorium.”

I took two very brave friends with me. Upon our third or fourth pre-Masturbate-a-Thon shot of courage, one of them remarked, “I can’t believe we’re going to this. One of us is going to go blind.” One of us did indeed go blind. About two hours into the event, the video camera just inexplicably stopped working. It was also about the same time one of my friends had to pull me out of a potentially terrifying scenario with Mae West, using the event’s official safety chant, “No Means No! No Means No!”.

Anyway. I went there to make a How Was It? video. And I did. The sound might be NSFW, but everything else has been sanitized for your pleasure. You didn’t want to see the actual Rubitorium anyway. Like a strange dream, I’ve already almost forgotten what it looked like. It’s probably better that way. I do remember thinking, during our post-Thon decompression shot at Mary’s Club, that whatever it was that we just saw, I was glad it existed. There’s a reason we saw that “Keep Portland Weird!” billboard on the way there. Something so wild and free could never happen in a club in Seattle. Not a million years.

RSS icon Comments

1

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

Posted by Just Sayin' | June 18, 2008 1:27 PM
2

It does happen in clubs in Seattle, the place is Club Seattle.

Posted by I came for a good cause | June 18, 2008 1:40 PM
3

This would never happen in Seattle because adults aren't allowed to touch or look at each other when alcohol is within 200 feet.

Posted by boxofbirds | June 18, 2008 1:41 PM
4

I'm sitting in a half shirt "punching the clown" in Kelly O's apartment right now. You might not want to sit down on the, well, anywhere.

Posted by Tucker | June 18, 2008 1:48 PM
5

I'm gonna watch that when I get home.

Posted by Greg | June 18, 2008 2:02 PM
6

I get as freaky as the next guy but I really prefer to masturbate alone. That's kind of the whole point.

Posted by monkey | June 18, 2008 2:23 PM
7

Oh Kelly O

You are the bomb!!!

Love ya 4 ever

Posted by Johnrl1 | June 18, 2008 3:22 PM
8

Hi Kelly O, I love your posts, you are awesome.

So, not only did people get busy with themselves, they got busy with others too? And what was vibrating on the santa?

Posted by PopTart | June 18, 2008 4:47 PM
9

Oh, never in Seattle.

every fourth Sunday of the month:
http://www.sexpositiveculture.org/events/zevent.2007-10-31.5153030088

Posted by Russell | June 18, 2008 4:50 PM
10

And there is also this group:
http://www.raincityjacks.org/home.html

Posted by Fitz | June 18, 2008 6:25 PM
11

This makes me wish I was already blind.

Posted by Vince | June 19, 2008 7:21 AM

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