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Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Words of Wisdom

posted by on May 13 at 16:37 PM

…from Slog commenter Gurldoggie:

This one relatively innocuous posting has sparked displays of rage at local businesses, national chains, meat eaters, vegetarians, religious believers and poor spellers. What is up with you people? Fried chicken doesn’t get your blood pressure up half as fast as an average Slog post. You people have got to get another hobby—this one is killing you!

The free-ranging fight about everything forever continues…

RSS icon Comments

1

The fight continues, but Gurldoggie has already won.

Posted by lostboy | May 13, 2008 4:45 PM
2

Guesswhat! I told the missus to stop at Ezells on the way home. We're having chicken tonight!

Thanks slog!

Posted by StC | May 13, 2008 4:51 PM
3

I always regret it after I eat at Ezell's. Not for moral reasons. Just the chicken ain't so good.

Also, if you go to the grassy knoll across the street to eat your chicken and throw a bone to the various birds to pick clean, keep your eye on the seagulls. They eat drumsticks whole.

Posted by Paulus | May 13, 2008 4:55 PM
4

Isn't that encouraging cannibalism, in a way?

Posted by NapoleonXIV | May 13, 2008 4:57 PM
5

Thank you Paulus for pointing out the obvious. Oprah is already a cheerleader for Ezell's, they don't need any more.

LET THE HATE CONTINUE ON A NEW THREAD

Posted by dreamboatcaptain | May 13, 2008 4:57 PM
6

A vegetarian diet cuts your risk of heart disease by over 25%, plus it reduces your risk of stroke, several cancers, and diabetes. Most of you have had loved ones die because they ate fried chicken and similar corpsemeat.

I doubt Slog is that bad!

Posted by humorless vegetarian ^_^ | May 13, 2008 4:59 PM
7

Everyone on both sides of my family has eaten "corpse meat" every day of their lives, and they've all lived well into their 80s. So much for that argument.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty | May 13, 2008 5:04 PM
8

@4: Since it's seagulls eating chicken bones, it would be more like humans eating some sort of ape, or even a monkey. I have no idea how a chicken's intelligence compares to a seagull's.

Posted by dreamboatcaptain | May 13, 2008 5:04 PM
9

Well if everyone's having fried chicken then I'll alert the fatosphere to add some bandwidth.

Posted by elenchos | May 13, 2008 5:06 PM
10

people who value health will eat a healthier diet. people who value the taste of fried chicken will eat fried chicken. whats your point 6?

Posted by Bellevue Ave | May 13, 2008 5:06 PM
11

"Everyone on both sides of my family has eaten "corpse meat" every day of their lives, and they've all lived well into their 80s. So much for that argument."

#7, this argument holds up as well as creation science.

Posted by dreamboatcaptain | May 13, 2008 5:07 PM
12

#7: I've seen smokers over 100!
#10: Just pointing out that Gurldoggie's "Slog is worse than fried chicken" statement is probably untrue!

If anyone is interested, there are lots of scientific articles here documenting the health benefits of a vegetarian diet. Click "related articles" for more.

(And don't pick out one study that doesn't show a health difference and say you proved a vegetarian diet is not healthier... the majority of articles and meta-studies support this finding.)

Posted by humorless vegetarian ^_^ | May 13, 2008 5:11 PM
13

I humbly submit that a short (medium-length?), tasty life is far better than a long, bland, humorless one. You've got your values, I've got mine.

Posted by shub-negrorath | May 13, 2008 5:23 PM
14

I'll have the 3/4 length version please.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | May 13, 2008 5:28 PM
15

In the end, we're all spicy dust in the wind.

Posted by Will in Seattle | May 13, 2008 5:31 PM
16

David, I'm surprised you haven't attracted the same amount of hatred as Paul "Why don't you steal from a fucking corporate bookstore" Constant for your comments about stealing from chili's instead of Ezell's.

Then again, you WERE joking. Right?

Posted by w7ngman | May 13, 2008 5:36 PM
17

David - People are not reading your post and continue to shout their opinions, yet another example of the vitriol that seems to have descended upon SLOGGERS like a dark cloud. Levity seems to beget slings and arrows - duck! Everyone seems so serious in a superficial cynical light hearted way. Can't we all just get along?

Posted by Adiabatic Man | May 13, 2008 6:09 PM
18

I suggest a vegan uprising against Chili's.

Posted by dreamboatcaptain | May 13, 2008 6:32 PM
19

@6 Vegetarianism also exposes you to numerous fun diseases! Without your proper omnivore complement of enzymes and bacteria, you're much more likely to frequently get everything from pesky common ailments to more severe gastroenterologic diseases. Wow! You're actually better off eating animal protein to stave off stroke, too.

You also reserve the right to be a perpetual pain in the ass know-it-all motherfucker at any gathering where food is served. Goody!

>>You commit genocide on all manner of insects and animals from your sheer continued existence as a human. We've wiped out species so we can grow vegetables better, introduced alien species from shipping grains that have invaded our continental waters and destroyed local ecosystems.

You're not ethically "safe" by declaring yourself a vegetarian.

Posted by Tdub | May 13, 2008 6:46 PM
20

nothing get my blood pressure up like dealing with my husband does. slog is my escape and relaxation. i would therefore argue the opposite is true: slog brings my blood pressure down!

Posted by ellarosa | May 13, 2008 8:19 PM
21

Woah, I was expecting this comment thread to be of like-minds, not more of this retarded vegetarian debate! Where the fuck is this coming from? The Slog posts about restaurants and food (even MEAT!!) all the fucking time.

Really, everyone, take a chill pill, count your blessings and go to sleep. Jesus.

Posted by catnextdoor | May 13, 2008 10:47 PM

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