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Wednesday, May 21, 2008

The Morning News

posted by on May 21 at 8:17 AM

Primary Results: In Oregon, in Kentucky, on Slog.

Tests Results: Seattle judges rule DUI screenings faulty.

Search Results: Microsoft has to pay you to use its search engine.

No Results: FBI knew about torture but couldn’t stop it.

Stabbed: Man on Capitol Hill.

Sacked: Plastic bags in San Francisco.

Refused: Aid supplies in Myanmar.

Britain: Protects gay Iranian.

Portland: Elects gay mayor.

No Medicine Balls: Gregiore caves on medical marijuana.

No Landmark: City board doesn’t want to save Denny’s building.

Death with Secrecy: Anti-initiative group tries to hide donors.

Lost Bird: Tells vet his address.

Faster, Lighter, Smaller: New design for “$100 laptop.”

From Sexual Happiness in Marriage: A Christian Interpretation of Sexual Adjustment in Marriage, by Herbert J. Miles, Ph.D. Copyright 1967.

Couples should face the fact that complete sexual success on the wedding night is nearly impossible, but this is nothing to worry about. What usually happens in first intercourse is that nine times out of ten, the husband has an orgasm and the wife does not. In order to think it through, let us assume that this happens. Then what? The bride must not feel that there is something wrong with her, that she is undersexed. She is not. God is efficient. He does not make mistakes….

Suppose neither the husband nor wife knew how to swim and a teacher gave them oral instruction on how to swim. Does this mean they could jump in the water and and swim naturally in the first attempt? Naturally not! They would sink. They would sink many times before they learned how to swim well.

Thus, a couple should not be discouraged if first intercourse is not completely successful. But rather, they should laugh at their “goofs.” Each time they “goof” (and they will do this many times across the years) they can simply laugh and say, “Well, we goofed tonight, but we learned something and we will do better next time.”

RSS icon Comments

1

@Portland

He's hot. And that, quite frankly, is all that matters.

Posted by Mr. Poe | May 21, 2008 8:47 AM
2

I'm not sure about the details of the stabbing, but I know that kiro is stating that the man was "stabbed near a capitol hill nightclub". Seeing as it is Pike and Broadway I'm going to say he was stabbed near quite a few... and a gas station.

It's good to see there that there is no witchhunt going on, and bias does not exist in the media.

Posted by Lushy J | May 21, 2008 8:49 AM
3

@2 -- Isn't the only "nightclub" near there Neighbors? And if he was stabbed there, why are the neighbors at Neighbors so unneighborly?

Not sure what the witch hunt might be you are referring to...people get stabbed and shot at our nightclubs, so it's not like they are inventing anything for sensational purposes. And KIRO may have information the police won't release formally.

Before you start a big fat MSM boo-hoo, let's see what shakes out.

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 8:57 AM
4

"Police are searching for the person who stabbed a man on Capitol Hill late Tuesday, although officers expect the victim to survive."

Although? What if the expected the victim to die?

Posted by elenchos | May 21, 2008 8:58 AM
5

"No, Mr. Bond! I expect you to die! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!!"

Sorry...

That is an good catch, elenchos. Further proof that the editors who crafted the Kansas City Star guidelines for journalists way back in the Punic Wars are now spinning in their graves at such a rate as to produce the electricity needed to light Wenatchee for a year.

Additionally, on the KIRO page, it appears there is a white cotton sweat suit on the sidewalk, and we are to infer this is what the victim OR stabber was wearing.

Who wears an all-white cotton sweat suit?

Here is your stabber: http://www.windycitydolls.com/images/Kish/RileySweatSuit.jpg

Carry on.

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 9:07 AM
6

*a

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 9:08 AM
7

I am definitely looking forward to some oral instruction on my wedding night.

Posted by Greg | May 21, 2008 9:09 AM
8

I can think of at least 25 encounters that were "goofs." OK, I lied. Make that 125.

Posted by Spoogie | May 21, 2008 9:12 AM
9

#3: The article says the 1500 block of Harvard Ave, which is right next to the War Room.

I don't know if anyone involved went there last night, but the War Room is the last of the 3 awful neighbors on the hill (Sugar and Club Lagoon are already closed). And no -- last night was not a hip hop night.

Posted by goodbye | May 21, 2008 9:13 AM
10

Why is Hillary still in the race?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20080521/pl_nm/usa_poll_politics_dc

She needs to get out, Obama needs to add 10 more points on to his lead against McCain.

Posted by Cato the Younger Younger | May 21, 2008 9:18 AM
11

haha, sorry about the surprise buttsecks. It was just a goof.

Posted by Giffy | May 21, 2008 9:24 AM
12

@3 -- the article says that is where he COLLAPSED. The stabbing took place by Neighbors (see Kiro.com for actual mention of Neighbors).

Sorry to hear The War Room is not a friendly neighbor. I had actually not heard anything about them forever and assumed they were closed, courtesy of the kiss of commercial death that building seems to have. I never go that way myself...tend to stick pretty much to Pike/Pine corner area and maybe Quinns and PIKE STREET FRIED FISH (you can just send the check to my address on file, Mr. Keck). Or 15th...Lower Cap Hill is just skanky these days. I feel sorry for Via Tribunali. And Rosebud is just nice food for people who don't have a car and need to escape their 5 other roommates.

I personally hope that PIKE STREET FRIED FISH (ditto) and other upstanding merchants are not run out by any new wave of crime. But I will keep my hat on and await further developments before I start to worry about PIKE STREET FRIED FISH (hat trick!).

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 9:26 AM
13

Doh! -- @9 !!!!!!

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 9:28 AM
14

"We goofed." That is priceless. Next time I get laid I'm gonna scream, "I'm GOOOOOFFING!!!!"

Posted by Mike in MO | May 21, 2008 9:28 AM
15

#12: Quinn's attracts a bad crowd too. I bet the stabber ate some foie gras there before going on his stabbing spree.

Posted by goodbye | May 21, 2008 9:37 AM
16

Tell me about it....one of the bartenders banged my BF. Well, we were broken up by then, but still. Now I can't go there anymore.

Other than that, the only filth I see there is half of Manhunt.

Posted by Jubilation T. Cornball | May 21, 2008 9:42 AM
17

THAT is the Mayor of Portland? Damn, he hit on me at Manray a few years ago...

Interesting, very interesting...

Posted by Cato the Younger Younger | May 21, 2008 9:45 AM
18

I go to Quinn's all the time. You're avoiding me, Jub.

Posted by Mr. Poe | May 21, 2008 9:48 AM
19

This sex excerpt was sort of cute. I mean, it actually has some good advice -- you're not going to have the ideal experience the first time or even every time, so just relax and don't take yourself too seriously.

The language is hilarious, of course, but the writer's heart seems to be in the right place (in this one anyways).

Posted by Julie | May 21, 2008 9:51 AM
20

@10

a. because a fighter

b. because you don't quit in the 8th inning even when down 100 to 12.

c. to build her base for the future

(a) the more vote for you this time the more will vote for you next time you run

(b) the more power you get as Senator w/ a national base...yes Kerry through this away he never even tried to maintain a base or run again. But she will.

(c) shows she is needed on the ticket--best way to keep her from running again in 2012 is put her on ticket now.

(d) to fucking piss you off because some Obama supporters are disrespectful, and people don't like it. FYI.

Unlike Obama himself who lavished praise and respect on her last night.

Stop expecting her to quit like a girlie girl. No one told Biden to quit when he clearly wasn't going to win.

Want her to stop?
Offer her VP.

Or don't, and (a) if Obama loses he's done for and she'll be nominee in 2012, (b) if Obama wins she will be a rival power center in the Senate fucking with him.

She is creating this deeper bond with voters and her own identity thru this campaign. Have you noticed that since mid Feb. she has won more states more delegates and more voters than Obama? She's doing well though not well enuf to win delegate contest. But well enough to show she is a force. She's no longer running as someone's wife or as the inevitable candidate she is no much respected by her base. 47% of Democrats is not a bad base and getting 65% when you have no chance for the nomination is pretty good.

It's an investment and it costs her little right now.

Posted by PC | May 21, 2008 10:02 AM
21

dominic, check your gmail account. please and thank you.

Posted by scary tyler moore | May 21, 2008 10:04 AM
22

"In her 35 years of public service, Senator Hillary Rodham Clinton has never given up on her fight for the American people. We have had our disagreements during this campaign, but we all admire her courage, her commitment, and her perseverance. *****No matter how this primary ends,******* Senator Clinton has shattered myths and broken barriers and changed the America in which my daughters and yours will come of age."

Posted by PC | May 21, 2008 10:23 AM
23

How often do you have to tell someone you're not interested?

Hils - Obama doesn't want you as VP - move on, he's just not that into you, girl!

Posted by Will in Seattle | May 21, 2008 10:52 AM
24

No one told Biden to quit when he clearly wasn't going to win

No one had to tell him. He was able to figure it all by himself.

Posted by Mike in MO | May 21, 2008 11:14 AM

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