And this is why I support the clubbing of baby seals.
I'd hit that.
Aww, I SlogTipped that just now. Too slow I guess.
Damn...now I gotta go find some penguin porn to take care of this woody...
Ah, the things scientists will get research papers out of. Has anyone seen this one? Another classic.
New desktop theme!
What's really disturbing is that "penguin porn" probably does exist.
If we had the Republican rules the penguin would have fucked the seal.
Worst part is this, "trying to insert itself, unsuccessfully.".
So frustrating. You finally get that cute lil' penguin to lie still, and you can't get it in. Stupid whiskey dick.
This is the best thing I've heard today. I'll be really impressed if something tops it.
The "unsuccessfully" is nice because now we know the penguin wasn't actually raped, so it's okay to laugh at it.
1. 45 minutes? The poor penguin must have been wondering why those "scientists" didn't help
2. there's the plot of Happy Feet 2/Surf's Up 2
@5 thanks for the link- now my penguin porn woody has gone down- ugh!
@11 #2 wins!
"it was the behaviour of a frustrated, sexually inexperienced young male seal."
This is why the seal community needs comprehensive sex education. Young seals who only hear the abstinence message end up fucking penguins.
@9 It's very difficult to find the penguin hole.
Sorry, I can't stop laughing. This is the best part of the article: "After 45 minutes the seal gave up, swam into the water and then completely ignored the bird it had just assaulted, the scientists report." Hahahahahahahahaha. Figures.
Also, on tsm's duck article: 75 MINUTES!? "Attempted Rape Flight" would make a good name for a band, though.
Hey! Who amongst us hasn't been horney enough to fuck a penguin??????
Times like this, I bet that penguin was wishing its fucking wings actually worked.
Here's the latest update from the University of Pretoria:
"After veterinarian psychological tests were completed, we concluded that the seal, hallucinating due to unusual sub-Antarctic weather patterns, mistook itself for Stranger Associate Editor Charles Mudede, and subsequently mistook the penguin for former 10,000 Maniacs vocalist Natalie Merchant."
Another bizarre consequence of global warming...
Stupid sexy pinguin!
"Why the seal attempted to have sex with the penguin is unclear."
The scientific observer in this case obviously just never met the right penguin.
One of the funniest things I have witnessed with my own two eyes was on a farm I was staying at in Costa Rica. A capuchin monkey came into the farmyard, started chasing a rooster around, grabbed it by the neck with its (prehensile) tail, and started banging away.
I had a (very blurry) picture entitled "Monkey Fucking Rooster" on my fridge for a year or so.
Ah, inter-species romance.
@19: The penguin was definitely asking for it.
What a coincidence! My car blew a seal just the other day.
If you lay your massive weight on her, and have sex with her, you are a rapist.
If she flaps her flippers desperately, and you have sex with her, you are a rapist.
If you are a walrus, and she is a penguin, you are a disturbed individual, or a furry. (ahem.)
In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 45 days old).