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1

just wait for those dolphins to sexually assault a person!

Posted by Bellevue Ave | April 29, 2008 8:52 AM
2

The notion of Mariska Hargitay getting it on with a dolphin is HAWT.

Posted by Olo | April 29, 2008 8:53 AM
3

Oh Mariska, haven't you heard about Dolphin Rape? You're playing right into thier manipulative flippers!

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | April 29, 2008 8:56 AM
4

i've always admired her for not changing her name to something easier to remember. like Mary Hart.

Posted by max solomon | April 29, 2008 8:59 AM
5

Your headline is the title of a mixtape by Eminem and Royce da 5'9". And that is all for headline trivia by Carollani this morning.

Posted by Carollani | April 29, 2008 9:24 AM
6

More sadistic than "24"? The show that the government has now acknowledged as a source of inspiration for its torture techniques? Really?

Posted by Fnarf | April 29, 2008 9:25 AM
7

@6 - Yes, really. Have you ever watched 24? They don't tend to dwell on child rape and the gruesome details of sexual assault in as many possible configurations as they can imagine, week after week . . .

And wow, this is certainly a new low for Robin Williams. That looks just terrible.

Posted by Levislade | April 29, 2008 9:38 AM
8

@7: 99% of the time, I can't stand L&O:SVU. And then there are nights like tonight, where I made a date with a friend and her cable TV to watch it. Because everyone loves a train wreck.

Posted by Jessica | April 29, 2008 9:45 AM
9

I LIKE Mariska Hargitay--and it's weird how much she looks like her mom facially. She was in the car when Jayne Mansfield was killed, and has a scar from that.

Posted by Nora | April 29, 2008 10:01 AM
10

SVU's best faux name was given to it by TV Guide -- "Sexy Verdict: Unanimous!"
TVG was obv referring to the hot-tastic lead actors, but seriously ... calling a show about sexual assault "Sexy" is wrong. Just wrong enough to be awesome.

Posted by finn tutuola | April 29, 2008 10:08 AM
11

SVU also habitually confuses sex with teenagers and pedofelia. As a parent of teenagers, I am really, really not a fan of underage sex. But (unlike the SVU writers) I know a college student hooking up with a high schooler is waaay different than hooking up with a kindergartener.

And Mariska Hargitay looks more and more like a human Bratz doll every season. So wrong.

Posted by Joan Munch | April 29, 2008 12:19 PM
12

this post is cracking me up.

Posted by Conchis | April 29, 2008 7:58 PM
13

Mr. Schmader, I like you lots. I think you're the bee's knees. But I'm disappointed with this post. Because, I clicked on the link expecting it to be just hilarious. It was gonna be about another idiotic star who has a quasi charity designed to help people they don't actually take the time to understand.

And then I clicked on it, prepared for hilarity, and read about how Mariska Hargitay is a trained rape crisis counselor, and actually does a shit-ton of intelligent charity work for people recovering from sexual abuse.

So, not so funny, actually pretty nice.


Go Mariska Hargitay, and go dolphins!

Posted by Sara | April 29, 2008 9:52 PM
14

Hello Sara: Yes, she's a bad ass, let there be no mistake.

Posted by David Schmader | May 1, 2008 2:39 PM

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