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Tuesday, April 1, 2008

The Morning News

posted by on April 1 at 8:18 AM

In Your Yard-Waste Bin: Meat and dairy scraps OK’d.

In Everett: Transit agency to buy 23 double-decker buses.

In Stupidity: One in ten voters believes Obama is Muslim.

In Irrelevancy: Reporters won’t stop asking Chelsea about Monica.

In Nassau: 80-year-old kicked out of mall for wearing anti-war shirt.

In Zimbabwe: Mugabe supporters declare victory; dissenters say vote was rigged.

In Issaquah: Costco recalls listeria-contaminated frozen chicken entrees. Happy National Frozen Food Month!

In Iraq
: Women are more likely to be raped by fellow soldiers than killed by enemy fire.

Under Attack: Clashes escalate in the Green Zone.

When All Else Fails
: Polar Bear Conservancy announces plan to relocate Arctic polar bears… to Antarctica.

Food Stamps: At highest level since the program began.

Recipe of the Day: Vegetarian Cassoulet, via Gourmet


For cassoulet

3 medium leeks (white and pale green parts only)
4 medium carrots, halved
lengthwise and cut into 1-inch-wide pieces
3 celery ribs, cut into 1-inch-wide pieces
4 garlic cloves, chopped
1/4 cup olive oil
4 thyme sprigs
2 parsley sprigs
1 Turkish or 1/2 California bay leaf
1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
3 (19-ounce) cans cannellini or Great Northern beans, rinsed and drained
1 quart water

For garlic crumbs
4 cups coarse fresh bread crumbs from a baguette
1/3 cup olive oil
1 tablespoon chopped garlic
1/4 cup chopped parsley

Make cassoulet:

Halve leeks lengthwise and cut crosswise into 1/2-inch pieces, then wash well and pat dry.

Cook leeks, carrots, celery, and garlic in oil with herb sprigs, bay leaf, cloves, and 1/2 teaspoon each of salt and pepper in a large heavy pot over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until softened and golden, about 15 minutes. Stir in beans, then water, and simmer, partially covered, stirring occasionally, until carrots are tender but not falling apart, about 30 minutes.

Make garlic crumbs while cassoulet simmers:

Preheat oven to 350°F with rack in middle.

Toss bread crumbs with oil, garlic, and 1/4 teaspoon each of salt and pepper in a bowl until well coated. Spread in a baking pan and toast in oven, stirring once halfway through, until crisp and golden, 12 to 15 minutes.

Cool crumbs in pan, then return to bowl and stir in parsley.

Finish cassoulet:

Discard herb sprigs and bay leaf. Mash some of beans in pot with a potato masher or back of a spoon to thicken broth. Season with salt and pepper. Just before serving, sprinkle with garlic crumbs.

RSS icon Comments


You guys really seem to be pulling for mugabe to win, even though the polls seem to indicate otherwise by too big of a margin for it to be rigged (by your link). And
What is this? yellow journalism?

Posted by idaho | April 1, 2008 12:26 AM

vegetarian cassoulet? really? that's like... penisless sex!

Posted by jameyb | April 1, 2008 8:44 AM

I must say, epicurious has some of the most unappetizing photos.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 1, 2008 8:44 AM

I for one can't wait for the Polar Bear Relocation. Seeing those Polar Bears charge through a herd of Emperor Penguins will be truly magnificent.

Posted by Ashley | April 1, 2008 8:56 AM

In musical news:

Over on Skins, the kids are putting on their candy-colored, romantic, over-the-top, high school play and if you guessed it’s called Osama! The Musical!, then you’d be right! There’s even the usual angsty teen drama subplot—but with singin’ and dancin’. And terrahism.

FSM help me—this is so fucking wrong—yet hilarious!

Once, I was a lonely banker
All I cared for were margins and accounts
I dreamed of Dow Jones and the FTSE
I didn’t see my credit running out…

I passed you on the floor each morning
I always gave a cheery smile
But you, you never even saw me
You were far too busy all the while

Then came the day Osama blew us away

Osama blew them away

And now, you know how I feel.

(They kiss; the orchestra swells)

Then came the day Osama blew us away
Osama blew them away
Then came the day Osama blew us away
Osama blew them away…

Posted by Original Andrew | April 1, 2008 8:59 AM

i wish chelsea had taken the opportunity to decry the state of journalism in this country when he asked that question. she's an intelligent, well educated and good person, i believe, and she could easily see that that question directed to her was a mark of low journalism. she could have said "sir, of what possible importance to the national good would it be for me to answer that question? did you even think about that before asking it? plus, it's just plain rude." that's what i wished she'd said.

Posted by ellarosa | April 1, 2008 9:11 AM

Low journalism is awesome, ellarosa. In related news, you're on Slog.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 1, 2008 9:15 AM

@6 The question wasn't from a journalist, it was from a student. This whole "town hall" format is so that politicians (or their representatives) can get a photo op without having to get real questions from knowledgable reporters. If they don't like it they can always take real questions from qualified people and actually answer them. They have no one to blame but themselves.

Posted by Mikeblanco | April 1, 2008 9:28 AM

Polar Bear Conservancy announces plan to relocate Arctic polar bears… to Antarctica.

April Fools!

Posted by Tlazolteotl | April 1, 2008 9:32 AM

Wouldn't that make them antipolar bears?

Posted by NapoleonXIV | April 1, 2008 9:33 AM

No -- it'd make them bi-polar.

Posted by unPC | April 1, 2008 9:44 AM

not that they haven't been down a bit lately anyway......

Posted by unPC | April 1, 2008 9:45 AM

@4 that certainly would have made the ending to march of the penguins a little more interesting. perhaps slightly less touching.

Posted by infrequent | April 1, 2008 9:45 AM

Co-sign @2. The best part of cassoulet is the MEAT. The most acceptable faux cassoulet I've ever had involved chicken and italian sausage (along with the requisite white beans).

Posted by Katelyn | April 1, 2008 9:45 AM


Exactly. Cassoulet isn't cassoulet without at least three different kinds of meat, preferably from at least that many different animals.

I know cassoulet; I cook cassoulet; and you, vegetarian bean stew are no cassoulet.

Posted by COMTE | April 1, 2008 9:48 AM

Polar Bears move to Antartica: You know, those gay penguins so do not want anything to do with any bears.

Posted by Andrew | April 1, 2008 9:51 AM

Antipodlar bears.

Posted by NapoleonXIV | April 1, 2008 9:52 AM

C'mon y'all! We have to be respectful of teh vegetarianz. They eat the same meals as we do, only their meals are better, cuz their ain't no "murrrder".

If you shanghai their bogus adjustments, they'd be one step closer to being an individual--and they don't want that. They want to be intellectuals!

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 1, 2008 9:55 AM

The real tip-off on the polar bear story was that they had already raised $15 million in private funds for the relocation...yeah, right.

Posted by Justy | April 1, 2008 9:57 AM

*there. Fuck. I blame meds.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 1, 2008 10:00 AM

From the article:
"The percentage of Americans receiving food stamps was higher after a recession in the 1990s, but actual numbers are expected to be higher this year."

This is what I hate about lazy and sensational newspaper "reporters". They focus on facts only when the support the conclusion they want to portray. Absolute numbers are meaningless when population in the US is still increasing over time. Especially since the growth sector of the population, immigrants and low income people, are more likely to need government assistance programs. I think in light of that and the downturn in our economy should make this situation obvious and expected.

Posted by pragmatic | April 1, 2008 10:01 AM

Seems like it would be okay to just call it "Bean Hot Dish." Less glamorous but just as delicious, and doesn't step on the toes of le time-honored French cuisine.

Posted by Katelyn | April 1, 2008 10:04 AM

@19 - for me it was the John McCain quote. But either way, well played, Polar Bear tricksters!

Posted by Levislade | April 1, 2008 10:12 AM

My chef friend and I made a delicious vegan cassoulet last Thursday. I only just finished the leftovers. I don't care what you call it, but it was yummy.

I'm all in favor of Chelsea refusing to answer that question, and I frankly hope Hillary would as well. It isn't anyone's business, it's very old news, and it has nothing to do with her fitness as a leader. I'm am Obama supporter and am actively praying for Clinton to loose, but if she lost solely because people were judging her for the Lewinsky scandal, I would be ashamed to be an American.

Posted by Jo | April 1, 2008 10:21 AM

They could send the bears to "the island."

Posted by hootie | April 1, 2008 10:48 AM

i call april fools on the polar bears, it's gonna cost a hell of alot more then $10,000 a bear to you might as well move the seals and walruses (wont someone please think of the walruses!). Oh hell you migh as well move the entire ecosystem down there...god knows what it will do to the antartic ecology

other then that you reminded me
I have to apply for food stamps this week...this "forced diet" I've been going through to pay rent is ridiculous
shit, I'm moveing back to montana

Posted by linus | April 1, 2008 10:55 AM

Rodents are going to take over the city.

Posted by Bad idea | April 1, 2008 11:36 AM

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