Slog - Comments on Rub Out Cancer

Comment by tsm

tsm — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 09:57:12 -0800

The protective effect was greatest while the men were in their 20s.

Phew! Me and my hairy palms are safe.

Comment by MikeSF

MikeSF — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:03:16 -0800

Excuse me for a while...

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:09:57 -0800

Masturbation is fucking boring.

Comment by Fifty-Two-Eighty

Fifty-Two-Eighty — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:10:48 -0800

More bad news for the Mormons.

Comment by Aislinn

Aislinn — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:26:09 -0800

So, if there are carcinogens in semen, am I increasing my risk of cancer by swallowing it?

Comment by max solomon

max solomon — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:27:10 -0800

"And they say sexual intercourse may not have the same protective effect because of the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted infection, which could increase men�s cancer risk."

that's fucking retarded bullshit. you aren't going to contract an infection from your mutually monogamous partner.

Comment by Chip Chipmunk

Chip Chipmunk — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:29:30 -0800

Yeah, but sometimes it's fun to let it build up.

Comment by NapoleonXIV

NapoleonXIV — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:33:47 -0800

I'm curing cancer! I'm curing cancer!

Comment by Mike in MO

Mike in MO — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:38:37 -0800

Aislinn @ 5 made me cure a little cancer.

Also, cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly, that's my story and I'm, er, sticking to it...

Comment by Jersey

Jersey — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:46:33 -0800

Like I needed a reason.

Comment by left coast

left coast — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:54:17 -0800

I'm covering all the bases on this. If this is correct on both counts, married men shouldn't need to get tested for prostate cancer. Add a sentence about the benefits of beating off to Internet porn, and this Nobel prize material.

Comment by Reverse Polarity

Reverse Polarity — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:55:40 -0800

Hah! I'm gonna live forever.

Comment by w7ngman

w7ngman — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 10:58:54 -0800

#3, are you even watching porn at the same time? Or getting someone to lick your balls?

#6, I thought that was crap too. Even though it's not quite the same, it reminded me a lot of the argument that circumcision reduces risk of contracting an STD, which only makes sense if you're having unprotected sex in the first place.

Comment by barney

barney — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:04:46 -0800

I'll say it again kids, Karma is good.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:06:59 -0800

@13

I was referring to solo masturbation. And no, I don't watch porn. Gay porn is fucking gross.

Comment by tiffany

tiffany — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:08:07 -0800

that's stupid. there's no difference between jacking off and having sex, as long as you use protection.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:09:08 -0800

And by that, I mean there is nothing sexy about watching a guy pucker up his butthole while the other buries his face in it.

Comment by infrequent

infrequent — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:09:38 -0800

no difference? i'm not sure i'd go that far...

Comment by Mike in MO

Mike in MO — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:11:39 -0800

there is nothing sexy about watching a guy pucker up his butthole while the other buries his face in it

There isn't?

Comment by w7ngman

w7ngman — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:12:21 -0800

#5, no! Not at all!

Or, if that doesn't convince you...

Everything causes cancer!

Comment by treacle

treacle — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:12:35 -0800

As if we boys needed any more reason to jack off. But hey, wtf, works for me. Onanism, YES!

Also, Mr. Poe @3 clearly has an atrophied imagination.

Comment by tiffany

tiffany — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:16:18 -0800

jizz is jizz. who cares how it comes about? no difference.

Comment by apres_moi

apres_moi — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:16:27 -0800

This information should be shown to every fucking senator and representative. Can we bring back Joycelyn Elders, who got fired for just saying that masturbation is healthy.

"We know that more than 70 to 80% of women masturbate, and 90% of men masturbate, and the rest lie."

Comment by Aislinn

Aislinn — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:18:41 -0800

Mike in Mo @9: I'm nothing if not a humanitarian.

w7ngman @20: Don't worry, I'm convinced. There are worse ways to go.

Comment by w7ngman

w7ngman — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:20:01 -0800

#15, straight porn can be pretty tasteful. Maybe some straight anal porn would do? If the girl is covering up her naughty bits, and isn't manicured, you could just pretend it's a dude cupping his balls.

Just trying to help!

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:27:51 -0800

Different folks, different strokes. I have no problem with a dude wanting to eat my ass, but the whole "what's good for you is good for me" thing doesn't exist in my world. If you think I'm going to return the favor, or kiss you again for the remainder of the night...think again.

Comment by elenchos

elenchos — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:31:34 -0800

Instead of porn you could try masturbating to the irrational rantings of a strident and doctrinaire feminist-environmentalist. Especially if you can locate any pictures of her giving the finger while staring you down with her cruel, wrathful eyes, yet smiling just a little because she is enjoying making you suffer.

I mean, I don't know myself but there's this freak dude that I barely know who tells me this is worth a try. Only a suggestion.

Comment by mmbb

mmbb — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:43:32 -0800

@8 NapoleonXIV:

You're killing kittens! You're killing kittens!

Comment by Hernandez

Hernandez — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:47:32 -0800

That was a private conversation, elenchos. I didn't give you permission to share it with the group.

Comment by elenchos

elenchos — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 11:59:56 -0800

@29

I'm positive we never discussed it. But I can understand if you're confused considering how many guys have told me they have the exact same fantasy. Who can blame them? It's hot when she gets like that.

I mean I've heard some people think it's hot when she gets like that.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 12:04:30 -0800

Ladies and gentlemen, elenchos and his raging clue for ECB.

Comment by elenchos

elenchos — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 12:19:07 -0800

See how it is?

Mr. Savage was trying to have a frank discussion about some important health information that all men need to know. I was offering mature and constructive input on that serious topic. And what do we see from 'typical slogger'?

Immature attempts to razz each other by deliberately misinterpreting what you say. It's immature man. I said nothing of the kind. I was just sharing something that I thought could help if you were like my weird friend. You're immature. God.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 12:42:01 -0800

Being mature on Slog is immature.

Comment by David

David — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:04:27 -0800

Who knew I was being so healthy 5-6 nights a week?

Comment by Doug

Doug — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:24:06 -0800

A "hand-y-Dan-dy" health tip . . .

Comment by infrequent

infrequent — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:29:30 -0800

@33 wait, is that one of those you are being intolerant if you are not tolerant of intolerance things? cause if i'm mature on slog, that means i'm being immature, which is mature, which is immature. maybe it's more like the i always tell the truth but i just told a lie one.

Comment by Greg

Greg — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:56:52 -0800

I wanted to add something hopelessly juvenile (for a change), but #5 made me all flustered and I forgot what I was going to say.

Comment by Mike in MO

Mike in MO — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 13:57:48 -0800

@ 34: why so infrequently?

Comment by catalina vel-duray

catalina vel-duray — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 14:09:25 -0800

When I think about you, I touch myself.

Comment by Will in Seattle

Will in Seattle — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 14:51:14 -0800

Basically, when you read the underlying papers, it comes down to: use it or lose it.

Sex works just as well as masturbation, but can have other risk factors ....

Comment by Jake

Jake — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:17:20 -0800

So why doesn't my insurance reimburse me for my randyblue.com membership dues?

TOTAL. CORPORATE. BULLSHIT.

Comment by Bellevue Ave

Bellevue Ave — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:44:17 -0800

This is nothing to worry about.

Comment by Tory

Tory — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 15:58:45 -0800

I could definitely see this study being founded by some National Porn Association of America, haha.

Comment by left coast

left coast — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 17:11:45 -0800

@41, sexulus.com, fight the power.

Comment by RHETT ORACLE

RHETT ORACLE — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 18:33:05 -0800

Help! where is my sexual Rosetta stone to decipher:

Sex works just as well as masturbation, but can have other risk factors ....

Ya' mean like embryonic formation? Or chlamydia?

Comment by Will in Seattle

Will in Seattle — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 22:45:50 -0800

@45 - yes. Mostly the latter.

Comment by Tim

Tim — Sun, 20 Apr 2008 00:36:31 -0800

Seriously, which creepy old researcher or lonely grad student thought this one up?

...Sitting in the lab one day, kicking around some new research topics...