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Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Rub Out Cancer

posted by on April 16 at 9:54 AM

From the BBC:

Men could reduce their risk of developing prostate cancer through regular masturbation, researchers suggest. They say cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly.

And they say sexual intercourse may not have the same protective effect because of the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted infection, which could increase men’s cancer risk.

Have at it, boys.

RSS icon Comments

1
The protective effect was greatest while the men were in their 20s.

Phew! Me and my hairy palms are safe.

Posted by tsm | April 16, 2008 9:57 AM
2

Excuse me for a while...

Posted by MikeSF | April 16, 2008 10:03 AM
3

Masturbation is fucking boring.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 10:09 AM
4

More bad news for the Mormons.

Posted by Fifty-Two-Eighty | April 16, 2008 10:10 AM
5

So, if there are carcinogens in semen, am I increasing my risk of cancer by swallowing it?

Posted by Aislinn | April 16, 2008 10:26 AM
6

"And they say sexual intercourse may not have the same protective effect because of the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted infection, which could increase menís cancer risk."

that's fucking retarded bullshit. you aren't going to contract an infection from your mutually monogamous partner.

Posted by max solomon | April 16, 2008 10:27 AM
7

Yeah, but sometimes it's fun to let it build up.

Posted by Chip Chipmunk | April 16, 2008 10:29 AM
8

I'm curing cancer! I'm curing cancer!

Posted by NapoleonXIV | April 16, 2008 10:33 AM
9

Aislinn @ 5 made me cure a little cancer.

Also, cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly, that's my story and I'm, er, sticking to it...

Posted by Mike in MO | April 16, 2008 10:38 AM
10

Like I needed a reason.

Posted by Jersey | April 16, 2008 10:46 AM
11

I'm covering all the bases on this. If this is correct on both counts, married men shouldn't need to get tested for prostate cancer. Add a sentence about the benefits of beating off to Internet porn, and this Nobel prize material.

Posted by left coast | April 16, 2008 10:54 AM
12

Hah! I'm gonna live forever.

Posted by Reverse Polarity | April 16, 2008 10:55 AM
13

#3, are you even watching porn at the same time? Or getting someone to lick your balls?

#6, I thought that was crap too. Even though it's not quite the same, it reminded me a lot of the argument that circumcision reduces risk of contracting an STD, which only makes sense if you're having unprotected sex in the first place.

Posted by w7ngman | April 16, 2008 10:58 AM
14

I'll say it again kids, Karma is good.

Posted by barney | April 16, 2008 11:04 AM
15

@13

I was referring to solo masturbation. And no, I don't watch porn. Gay porn is fucking gross.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 11:06 AM
16

that's stupid. there's no difference between jacking off and having sex, as long as you use protection.

Posted by tiffany | April 16, 2008 11:08 AM
17

And by that, I mean there is nothing sexy about watching a guy pucker up his butthole while the other buries his face in it.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 11:09 AM
18

no difference? i'm not sure i'd go that far...

Posted by infrequent | April 16, 2008 11:09 AM
19

there is nothing sexy about watching a guy pucker up his butthole while the other buries his face in it

There isn't?

Posted by Mike in MO | April 16, 2008 11:11 AM
20

#5, no! Not at all!

Or, if that doesn't convince you...

Everything causes cancer!

Posted by w7ngman | April 16, 2008 11:12 AM
21

As if we boys needed any more reason to jack off. But hey, wtf, works for me. Onanism, YES!

Also, Mr. Poe @3 clearly has an atrophied imagination.

Posted by treacle | April 16, 2008 11:12 AM
22

jizz is jizz. who cares how it comes about? no difference.

Posted by tiffany | April 16, 2008 11:16 AM
23

This information should be shown to every fucking senator and representative. Can we bring back Joycelyn Elders, who got fired for just saying that masturbation is healthy.

"We know that more than 70 to 80% of women masturbate, and 90% of men masturbate, and the rest lie."
Posted by apres_moi | April 16, 2008 11:16 AM
24

Mike in Mo @9: I'm nothing if not a humanitarian.

w7ngman @20: Don't worry, I'm convinced. There are worse ways to go.

Posted by Aislinn | April 16, 2008 11:18 AM
25

#15, straight porn can be pretty tasteful. Maybe some straight anal porn would do? If the girl is covering up her naughty bits, and isn't manicured, you could just pretend it's a dude cupping his balls.

Just trying to help!

Posted by w7ngman | April 16, 2008 11:20 AM
26

Different folks, different strokes. I have no problem with a dude wanting to eat my ass, but the whole "what's good for you is good for me" thing doesn't exist in my world. If you think I'm going to return the favor, or kiss you again for the remainder of the night...think again.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 11:27 AM
27

Instead of porn you could try masturbating to the irrational rantings of a strident and doctrinaire feminist-environmentalist. Especially if you can locate any pictures of her giving the finger while staring you down with her cruel, wrathful eyes, yet smiling just a little because she is enjoying making you suffer.

I mean, I don't know myself but there's this freak dude that I barely know who tells me this is worth a try. Only a suggestion.

Posted by elenchos | April 16, 2008 11:31 AM
28

@8 NapoleonXIV:

You're killing kittens! You're killing kittens!

Posted by mmbb | April 16, 2008 11:43 AM
29

That was a private conversation, elenchos. I didn't give you permission to share it with the group.

Posted by Hernandez | April 16, 2008 11:47 AM
30

@29

I'm positive we never discussed it. But I can understand if you're confused considering how many guys have told me they have the exact same fantasy. Who can blame them? It's hot when she gets like that.

I mean I've heard some people think it's hot when she gets like that.

Posted by elenchos | April 16, 2008 11:59 AM
31

Ladies and gentlemen, elenchos and his raging clue for ECB.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 12:04 PM
32

See how it is?

Mr. Savage was trying to have a frank discussion about some important health information that all men need to know. I was offering mature and constructive input on that serious topic. And what do we see from 'typical slogger'?

Immature attempts to razz each other by deliberately misinterpreting what you say. It's immature man. I said nothing of the kind. I was just sharing something that I thought could help if you were like my weird friend. You're immature. God.

Posted by elenchos | April 16, 2008 12:19 PM
33

Being mature on Slog is immature.

Posted by Mr. Poe | April 16, 2008 12:42 PM
34

Who knew I was being so healthy 5-6 nights a week?

Posted by David | April 16, 2008 1:04 PM
35

A "hand-y-Dan-dy" health tip . . .

Posted by Doug | April 16, 2008 1:24 PM
36

@33 wait, is that one of those you are being intolerant if you are not tolerant of intolerance things? cause if i'm mature on slog, that means i'm being immature, which is mature, which is immature. maybe it's more like the i always tell the truth but i just told a lie one.

Posted by infrequent | April 16, 2008 1:29 PM
37

I wanted to add something hopelessly juvenile (for a change), but #5 made me all flustered and I forgot what I was going to say.

Posted by Greg | April 16, 2008 1:56 PM
38

@ 34: why so infrequently?

Posted by Mike in MO | April 16, 2008 1:57 PM
39

When I think about you, I touch myself.

Posted by catalina vel-duray | April 16, 2008 2:09 PM
40

Basically, when you read the underlying papers, it comes down to: use it or lose it.

Sex works just as well as masturbation, but can have other risk factors ....

Posted by Will in Seattle | April 16, 2008 2:51 PM
41

So why doesn't my insurance reimburse me for my randyblue.com membership dues?

TOTAL. CORPORATE. BULLSHIT.

Posted by Jake | April 16, 2008 3:17 PM
42

This is nothing to worry about.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | April 16, 2008 3:44 PM
43

I could definitely see this study being founded by some National Porn Association of America, haha.

Posted by Tory | April 16, 2008 3:58 PM
44

@41, sexulus.com, fight the power.

Posted by left coast | April 16, 2008 5:11 PM
45

Help! where is my sexual Rosetta stone to decipher:

Sex works just as well as masturbation, but can have other risk factors ....

Ya' mean like embryonic formation? Or chlamydia?

Posted by RHETT ORACLE | April 16, 2008 6:33 PM
46

@45 - yes. Mostly the latter.

Posted by Will in Seattle | April 16, 2008 10:45 PM
47

Seriously, which creepy old researcher or lonely grad student thought this one up?

...Sitting in the lab one day, kicking around some new research topics...

Posted by Tim | April 20, 2008 12:36 AM

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