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Monday, March 17, 2008

Memo To The Person Who Owns The Car I Walk Past Nearly Every Day

posted by on March 17 at 10:25 AM

Dear Person Who Etc.,

You have a bumper sticker that reads:


I just wanted you to know that owning a car is not Living Simply So Others May Simply Live. It is in fact the exact opposite.

Thank you for your kind attention,
Paul Bobby

RSS icon Comments


Uh oh! I smell a than-thou-off!

Posted by elenchos | March 17, 2008 10:31 AM

Unless this person lives in said car and never drives it.

Posted by Mahtli69 | March 17, 2008 10:32 AM

Give me the exact coordinates and I'll do the keying.

Posted by Mr. Poe | March 17, 2008 10:32 AM

Perhaps not, but there may be some other things he/she does or does not do that would be considered living simply. Until you know what you are talking about, best not talk about it.

Either way though, bumper stickers are basically just a form of masturbation. It's not like they convince anyone of a particular point of view. They just tell everyone what the owner's point of view, as if anyone cares.

Posted by cmaceachen | March 17, 2008 10:41 AM


I'm curious, how does the Stranger distribute it's countless stacks of free bar-ad rags each week? Last I checked it wasn't by bicyle or shade-raised pack mule.

High horse much?

Posted by Jeff | March 17, 2008 10:47 AM

How about "Buy goods so that others may simply have jobs".

Posted by giffy | March 17, 2008 10:53 AM

Plus, unless I'm mistaken, the Stranger prints in Yakima, which means a bunch of driving across the pass every single week with a very large load of paper, which I hear is heavy. And yes, if you live on the hill and work there you can get away with not owning a car. But there are lots of reasons a person might need one. Listen to music ever? I can guarantee you that most people schlepping equipment to under-attended, starting-at-midnight Seattle gigs can't do so on the bus. As one example...

Posted by Hmm | March 17, 2008 10:55 AM

The SLOG sure is becoming anti-car lately.

Posted by Curtains | March 17, 2008 11:03 AM

Just because a car was in the city doesnt mean the person actually resides or works there. Living outside of the convenience of the metro bus lines does not necessarily make a person a carbon spewing McMansion owner, which most of the Stranger's staff tends to assume

Posted by owen | March 17, 2008 11:11 AM

huff, huff, and puff, I am so cool

spare us

we all need to do better in a thousand ways, and, judgmental finger pointing is all too christian for me

I bet this person recycles every scrap and bottle, even old clothes, yeah

Posted by Adam | March 17, 2008 11:12 AM

It's all relative. You don't have to go hunter-gatherer to make a difference. If this car-owner avoids airplane vacations she may be living a lot more sustainably than lots of "car-free" urbanites(myself included).

The obsession with car ownership is divisive and trite

Posted by jonglix | March 17, 2008 11:12 AM

@8 - "Lately"? Where have you been? Stranger staffers have been virulently anti-car for quite a while now.

@7 - Good point. I think it's great that more and more people can get by without driving (or at least with only minimal driving, as is my situation), but when those folks constantly hate on the car-driving masses, it just makes them look like pompous enviro-snobs.

Posted by Hernandez | March 17, 2008 11:15 AM

Somebody needs to be Peeped.

Posted by Will in Seattle | March 17, 2008 11:21 AM

Jesus Christ, dude, you don't even know this person. Get a life.

Posted by Get the Lead Out | March 17, 2008 11:32 AM

Paul, you're a douchbag. I'm now officially sick of The Stranger. I never thought it would happen. Sure, I'll read Savage Love and I, Anonymous, but you've ruined it for me Paul. Your Holier Than God attitude has made you the new Hutch.

So, how long before you start sending out "Prayer Warrior" missives with your own unique brand of douchebaggery?

Posted by Brad in Seattle | March 17, 2008 11:38 AM

Some noxious SMUG emissions from another self rightious martyr.

Come live an in Eugene, and bitch yourself to death like everyone else down here.

Posted by OR Matt | March 17, 2008 11:45 AM

Brad in Seattle, take this bumper sticker off your car before things get hairy.

Posted by Mr. Poe | March 17, 2008 12:01 PM

Breaking News: There is a hypocrite amongst us!! Oh, the horror!!!

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Posted by Julie | March 17, 2008 12:07 PM

If I could create a bumper sticker for the comments on this post, it'd be 'Sock puppet so that others can't put the bullseye on your back.'

Constant's implied point is a good one. Keep in mind: Neither he nor the Stranger is actively claiming here to be anything they're not, but the owner of this car and bumper sticker clearly is.

Posted by Gomez | March 17, 2008 12:39 PM

Self righteous prick.

Posted by Rotten666 | March 17, 2008 12:42 PM

Yeah, sorry Paul, but Jesus. We'll all be dead within 100 years -- one car won't kill us any faster/slower.

Posted by Jason Josephes | March 17, 2008 12:49 PM

Leave the bumper sticker alone. IF we started the crunching the numbers of the technologies and resources available of our society ... the only real solution to the planets problems is ... mass suicides.

Go ahead, any takers? Preach all you want about cars and sustainability, but 6 billion people WILL NOT be sustained on organic farming ... period. Yes I buy my organic produce mostly, but I'm man enough to admit that it is a LUXURY that I can afford for the momment.

We have real problems, and playing the holier than though card is only going to alienate people.

Posted by OR Matt | March 17, 2008 1:49 PM

Wow, talk about being self righteous,

Here's an idea, how about you live by example, thus slowly influencing the people around you by the way you live and maybe they will come around to your way of thinking by seeing how you live your life and then they will influence the other people around them etc.

Unfortunately for you, this involves actually sacrificing your self righteous ego and may take years to actually accomplish.

Posted by Brian in Seattle | March 17, 2008 2:18 PM

i own a car and i work at the Stranger AND i commute in everyday in my car. i'm even thinking about buying a second car so my husband can commute to his job solo as well!

yay cars! i love gas!!!

Posted by dawn | March 17, 2008 2:54 PM

I hate those stickers.

Posted by David E. | March 17, 2008 7:39 PM

Jesus, does no one here appreciate irony?

Never mind. This is the best defensive-overreaction thread I've seen in a while. My favourite is the stern: "Leave the bumper sticker alone." Or... or you'll have to mess with ME!

Posted by Irena | March 18, 2008 6:03 PM

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