My Virginity

Hometown: My penis

Age: 27

Died: My birthday, 2008, in my bedroom in my mom's house.

Unit: not applicable

Incident: My virginity was on night patrol inside my pants having set up a perimeter of anime cartoons on VHS tape around the virginal region. I had the biggest boner ever, as usual, ha ha! My mom's friend the divorced manicurist found me and used an improvised alcohol device nearly overwhelm my virginity, until her morale suddenly broke and she ran from the room in tears. My wounded virginity was rushed to Donnie Marburg's house, where after several hours of intense debate it was determined that the combination of ejaculation and momentary but definite contact with some part of a (presumably) female genital organ had been fatal, and my virginity was pronounced dead.

the humorous thing is that 800k views and what does he actually have to show for it? Eli's mouth firmly planted on his unmentionables?

Chris Crocker sucks figurative cock.

This is the least annoying Chris Crocker video yet. I encourage him to keep all his videos no longer than this one.

Chris is very pretty - god what a hit in the Seattle fag bars he would be

Cum visit, Chris, it seems Dan would steer you around town

NOT as protector

well.. if i ever see him at any bar i'm in i WILL slap him sillier..

Oh shit!

Gay icon vs. gay icon!

I would pay to see that.

I find it hilarious how some people don't understand his marketing technique.

It seems to scare a lot of people.. but he thrives because he's hated, and might I add that it isn't as though he woke up one morning and was a hit. He's been working at his craft for years now. I remember his first set of videos being huge viral hits.

Who knows if the media will ever accuratley portray him, but thankfully I believe he has a sense of humor about the chaos surrounding his name.

Who is this person and why do I care?

I thought we were over this bullshit.

Chris Crocker is destined to be one of the most famous persons of this era. It is only beginning.

At this point his fame is just a tease.

He projects in video like a nova, he will be cast in a movie and become a super star. Just not quite yet.

Get ready. His Kama is that of an ancient person, his rewards in this life are just ahead.

He will help make Obama the President.

I am not a fan of any sort. I monitor creative energies.

Sometimes I really, really think I'm going to do something prison-worthy one day.

he would make a surprisingly attractive woman.

I wish I were as pretty as Chris Crocker. Gawd.

#12 Mr. Pooe

Getting paid to do old guys? Possible offense called simple prostitution.

Not prison, though - county slammer.

I'm not going to add to his page views.

Please feel free to describe it in a tediously detailed manner, though.

If you wish.

I bet more people hate him than like him, which is why his markeability is the fail..

I dunno - since I really don't care that much, I haven't really explored it - but has anybody floated the theory that this entire thing is some sort of elaborate joke/performance art thing to begin with? Or is there bonafide proof that this person is "real"?

Chris Crocker? I thought it was Joan Van Ark...

Real - small town - lives with mom

I saw this earlier in the post about two YouTube videos and thought "A million people watched some somewhat-pretty chick who kind of looks like Chris Crocker blink?"

Is that REALLY a physically-male person? It looks more like a bad try at a new Barbie Ugly Kingdom Princess doll.

Yikes.

What exactly is this "chris crocker"'s claim to fame? Betty's illegitimate "lil muffin?"

@20 - Really? Been to the town? Met his mom? Please tell us more. Sounds like you have the scoop.