Life Misaddressed
posted by on February 12 at 13:59 PM
This just arrived at editor@thestranger.com, and I’m pretty sure it wasn’t meant for me or Frizzelle. Ksyusha is looking for the person, and I don’t think I’m the person, nor is Christopher. But maybe you are the person? If so, feel to exchange with Ksyusha letters.
Hello!My name is Ksyusha. I saw that you are lonely and consequently I have decided to write to you. As you very much interested me. I as am lonely to me of 29 years I live Russia. My country very much greater, but I to you about shall not tell as you about it and heard. I shall a little tell to you about myself very interesting and and the sociable girl. At me is many friends and girlfriends, but unfortunately I cannot find to myself the person. And consequently I have decided to write to you. If I you than that have interested that I shall be very glad to exchange with you letters. Certainly if you write to me that I shall send you many my pictures as I shall be glad to see set of your pictures.
Here my e-mail address: KSYUSHAVERSHININA@GMAIL.COM
I can't see her eyes. What color are they?
Come on Dan, you know you want her! LOL!!
Oh Ksyusha...
You already broke my heart. When I think about all I did for you, all the money I sent, all the access I gave you to my bank account, and for what? You never showed up at the airport, you won't answer my letters, you never even return my phone calls! If it wasn't for all the topless photos you emailed me, I would have nothing to show for our time together. And now I hear you're making time with Dan Savage?
Oh Ksyusha, how can I live with this misery?!?! Take my credit cards, take my home, take it all Ksyusha, just please...come back...please.
Dan, won't this get you in trouble with your wife who works at the Stranger, or your husband who's home with the kid?
Does she charge by the hour or the blow job?
oh that's good, but I can top that; here's an actual email I received from my "friend" Pipi:
get us more pics, Dan! It's your duty!
Fuck her the way Tom Cruise would. However he does it, I'm, uh, not sure.
@8 - like this
I've been trying to figure out this one I got earlier: "Find local girls in your city who want to get fucked by the same man".
Who is this man, and why would I care if girls want to fuck him. Is this some new fetish I am not aware of, whereby one enjoys porn featuring 'the same man' fucking random women.
My spam blocker must be working, because I never get anything like any of these emails.
My spam blocker must be working, because I never get anything like any of these emails.
I worked in a cubicle next to a fella who fell for not one, but two, of these online Russian babes.
Highly entertaining.
@13, in a row or at once, cuz honestly, I might fall for the latter.
russian women understand heels.
Go for it, dude. I'd do her.
On the non-lighter side, however, for an educated woman living in the former Soviet Union (mostly Russia), moving from there to here will literally double your life span, reduce violence against you (yes, even spousal abuse), and reduce your risk of HIV/AIDS and TB.
Of course, moving to Sweden, Denmark, or Norway would work even better than that. Or even Canada.
So, did you write her back? Dude, don't leave us hanging! tells us how this ends!
Does Christopher Frizzelle like the ladies?
As a Russian myself, I can see that the letter is written with perfect Russian idioms and grammar. Online translation, unfortunately, sucks.
Interesting to note.
russian women understand legs too
Word for word, exactly like an e-mail I got a couple of years ago. And I'm sorry to say, I was in such a low emotional state that I carried on a correspondence with her (or someone like her) for several weeks. Luckily friends slapped some sense into me and I had a PI with a contact in Russia check her out. Total scammer. Fortunately, I didn't send her any money...
Could it be related to your Savage Love column about the 70-year old man who paid large amounts of money for a 29-year old Russian virgin?
@ #6, you know Pipi too?!! that horny dog!
You could at least ask if she has a brother who is also looking.
On a side note, I got some delicious borscht at Cafe Yarmarka in Post Alley today - probably better than Second Ave Deli in NYC. No hot Russian women there today, although come to think of it, I don't think I've ever eaten Russian with a Russian woman.
@ 20: no shit, I was totally wondering about that. thanks!
This is a scam. My friend Thor got a few of these emails back in 2004. He sent over $300 was promised she would move to the USA. Well come to find out its the Russian Mob using this as a front for making money from ppl whom think its actually a woman.
Keep in mind this before replying.
Let's take up collection and have the new intern send her weird love-letters ghost written by Ch. Mudede. We'll start tame, and eventually have her sending pictures posing naked with livestock among old brutalist soviet buildings. I'll kick down the first 20 bucks!
That's an interesting e-mail letter. I feel a little bit jealous however, since I received exactly the same letter yesterday (I'm living in Greece). Couldn't resist to make a "KSYUSHAVERSHININA" search in google first, to find out that I'm Dan's rival. It seems that this "lady" likes to make many friends, and to "travel" a lot.
Excellent use of "consequently," by the way.
@6: So what is a "normal gay" anyway? I wanna know if any of my gay friends are normal!
Hello.
My name is John Paul, I live in Quito, Ecuador. If you want to know more of my beautiful country, you can write and what not imagine that you and I can share.
My email address is:
jp.espinell@engineer.com
jespinell@sote.petroecuador.com.ec
Hello.
My name is John Paul, I live in Quito, Ecuador. If you want to know more of my beautiful country, you can write and what not imagine that you and I can share.
My email address is:
jp.espinell@engineer.com
jespinell@sote.petroecuador.com.ec
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