I thought the Public Intern thing looked like fun. Now I pity you.

I LOVE THE PUBLIC INTERN!! I would watch this TV show every week.

Beats me. I used to be a dog owner and no one, not the books I read nor a series of vets, told me to do that.

the act itself not so bad (i.e. get over it y'all). far better than, as one poster has already noted, your dog scooting around your carpet, leaving behind the aforementioned battery acid 'aroma'

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

Bon voyage, Public Intern. We'll miss you.

I called you out in Aladdin's a while back. Sorry about that.

But this is going too far. I see Public Intern as sweet and good neighborly. This has crossed the line into utterly disgusting. A cruel torture of the Public Intern, like a sick frat house hazing gone awry.

Next you'll be waterboarding the poor guy. When will it ever end?

Public Intern is a hero.

I used to be a vet tech. It is quite a smell.

Though, the procedure is kind of satisfying. Like squeezing a big ripe zit. :D

I'm a student of the Benjamin Nicholas school of poetry.

thankfully this was the only dog i'd own with angry ass sacs.

your dog is letting go of big old ripe farts scraped off the face of a turd

your dog is letting go of big old ripe farts scraped off the face of a turd

your dog is letting go of big old ripe farts scraped off the face of a turd

Here is an informative page on that topic. It's literally called "The Anal Sacs Page." How bluntly apt, don't you think?

Our cockerspaniel had to have this done, and the vet said that if we took the dog for walks more often it wouldn't be as big of an issue.

Eventually, our beloved cocoa got internal infections because of these and had to be put down because the sickness from the infections had spread through his body. He really suffered.

"Hi mom," is say.

"Sam, he's dead."

"What, mom?"

"Cocoa's dead."

"What are you talking about?"

"We killed Cocoa."

"You what!?"

"We had to put him down."

"What the fuck, mom. Great way to start the conversation."

"We killed him, Sam."

"Mom, seriously. You don't just say that."

*click*

My mother is quite the dramatic person.

I'm over it now.

But the moral of the story here, of course, is make sure to squeeze your dog's anal sacs!

The "acting out"? The dog dragging her bed into the front yard and enthusiastically humping it in front of God and the neighbors. Since she's not dragging her ass across the yard, my mom just lets her hump. It's truly a sight to behold, especially when she makes eye contact.

I wonder how many people got those little purse dogs and found out about anal glands the hard way (preferably all over their $500 Coach dog carriers)?

Sheesh.

Anal glands shouldn't require expressing. They should express on their own when the dog defecates. In some dogs, though, they don't express normally on their own. This causes discomfort for the dog, which is why you'll see the scooting (which sometimes releases the glands, and sometimes doesn't).

Proper diet and hydration can fix the problem in some dogs. In others, it's a genetic problem and has to be done for them. Smaller breeds do seem more prone. . . seems like I saw a lot of poodles and spaniels with the problem. But it can be an issue for any dog if their stools aren't the right consistency.

Holy Jesus Napoleon, that is the best ever.

Even better that you used my favorite poet. (Langston Hughes for those who didn't recognize it).