Drugs Toad in the Hole
posted by on November 20 at 13:14 PM
Every Friday for almost a year, This Week on Drugs has endeavored to inform you of the most significant drug-related developments and shocking tragedies. But, alas, our caffeine-addled mind occasionally leaves a glaring omission. Last week was one of those times, when we failed to report a most egregious example of an innocent victim riddled in the drug war’s crossfire.
KANSAS CITY, Mo. — A 21-year-old man has been accused of using a toad to get high.Clay County sheriff’s deputies said David Theiss, of Kansas City, possessed a Colorado River toad with the intention of using it as a hallucinogenic.
Experts said it’s possible to lick the toad’s venom glands to achieve psychedelic effects.
Most pet stores don’t sell the Colorado River toad because the venom can sicken humans and kill household animals.
A toad, ladies and gentlemen, was minding its amphibusiness – eating flies, hopping, being generally gross – when this joneser came along and slobbered all over it. I mean, get that man some better drugs. Adding insult to injury…
The toad is in custody at a police crime lab.
In more predictable news, chicken-shit Democrats have provided college aid for murderers but not for toad-lickers.
Simpsons did it.
"Great police work. Becky, I want that report in the morning. The mayor's on my ass and blablahblah!"
As did Beavis & Butt-head
@1: actually it was family guy. =)
That mushroom guy would make a great DO NOT WANT meme
Watch the hilarious documentary "Cane Toads" to see more about the arcane practice of toad-licking.
Remember tho, there's a mushroom cap on the property taxes so that the ultra-rich can keep ripping us off anyway.
I loves that mushroom pic!
Actually, the Simpsons DID do it LONG before the crapfest known as Family Guy ripped them off, like everything else they do...
It was the episode Homer became a missionary to avoid the PBS pledge drive mafia and ended up on a tropical island.
That Family Guy was soo funny.
Well, I suppose licking toads is better than huffing the gas from fermented shit. Still, I think I'll stick with BC Bud.
Toads are not either gross. Toads are cool. Toad-lickers are dorks. Cops who arrest toad-lickers do not have enough to do.
The X-files did it first. They did the toad-licking-to-get-high-stint over a decade ago.
You jackasses. You have to collect, dry, and then smoke the venom for it to do anything. Licking is a myth.
http://www.erowid.org/animals/toads/
Look around for toad venom-smoking trip reports, too!
Oh, and The Simpson's toad licking episode is where we all get "Jeebus" too.
Also the X-Files episode was teh awesome.
Dave Barry wrote about it eons ago.
"Daria" also did it.
Someone needs to float the toad.
http://www.hfml.ru.nl/froglev.html
Everybody click on that link at the end, then click on "take action now" and sign the petition.
And then join the Drug Policy Alliance, sponsor of the petition. They are great.
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