Slog - Comments on Real Men Aren't Afraid to Suck Straws

Comment by Paul Barwick in SF

Paul Barwick in SF — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:21:48 -0800

"all the men had moved from being high school football players to college football cheerleaders."

Well, that sorta skews the study, don't you think? Not that there's anything wrong with being a male cheerleader.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:28:21 -0800

Woo! Party on!

Comment by clueless frat boy

clueless frat boy — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:31:32 -0800

I dont get it. How can our team be all hetero, and playing for the other team at the same time? Makes no sense, these guys all love what football is about, scoring in the end zone, tight ends bringing it home, a huddle with the guys to plan our moves against the other guys, a good foul free snap between the legs, that kind of stuff. I think you gayz are reading too much into our fun.

WHOOO COUGS! beat those other teams, beat 'em to a froth!!!

Comment by Just Me

Just Me — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:38:29 -0800

Dan had sex with a girl??? EEWWWW!!! GROSS!!!! (LOL!!)

I never even had the curiosity to try it. It is all meat for this kid; all meat all the time!

Comment by Kevin Hamm

Kevin Hamm — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:41:36 -0800

No, for real? You can't suck a straw, it's girly, but put that beer bottle, the long-necked, thick, sweating nectar-filled glass dick and just gently sip the foaming flow from it while everyone watches you.

The martini is much less phallic, but 'real men' love beer in bottles. Go figure.

Comment by browntown

browntown — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 15:48:27 -0800

that is super hot. However, having been in research for over two years, it's a bummer to see that this survey didn't have a more robust sample size. I like the generalization/conclusion this study arrived at, but I'd accept it as truth if it were done better.

Comment by NapoleonXIV

NapoleonXIV — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:00:39 -0800

It's not about the size of the sample, it's about what you do with it.

Comment by laterite

laterite — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:09:54 -0800

clueless frat boy, you do know that by using the word "froth", you've revealed where your tendencies might lie, right? And stop cheering for the Cougs; I've found that UW frat guys exhibit your behavior far more often.

Comment by curious straight girl

curious straight girl — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:12:33 -0800

one thing i don't understand about gay sex:
i am a straight female. taking it up the ass HURTS. i can never get beyond getting the tip in. how the hell do you do it? and in gay porn, why do the men taking it up the butt always have a flacid penis/

Comment by Gitai

Gitai — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:18:33 -0800

No surprise here. Living in Seattle skews the sample, but when I was whoring around in college, I slept with tons of straight identified guys.

Comment by clueless frat boy

clueless frat boy — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:29:44 -0800

for laterite:
I dont get what you're saying, but thats cool: i don't mind the dawgs(though I would, if they are in fact teh gay) Butt you know who I Really hate is the BEAVERS, try reading something into that one, smart guy... all our chicks here are hot for football guys, as it should be.

Comment by max solomon

max solomon — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:30:06 -0800

did circle jerks count? i bet they did.

i thought that was kind of gay, but its not in the same category as taking it up the ass.

i'd put same sex behaviors in this ascending order:

1. circle jerk
2. getting blown
3. kissing a guy
4. fucking a guy in the ass
5. blowing
6. getting fucked in the ass

if any of this happens outside of prison, eventually you cross the gay line. or at least the autogynophilic line.

Comment by tsm

tsm — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 16:43:15 -0800

Discussing sex with a guy is gay. Discussing sex with a woman is straight, even telling a woman "Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to suck a cock" is straight. Sports are gay, especially contact sports, unless you're the only guy on both teams, in which case it is straight. Gyms are always gay, because afterwords, in the locker room, you're showering with guys, and that is gay. Watching pornography alone is neutral, like eating a sandwich. It's neither straight nor gay. Watching pornos with one or more other guys in the room, no matter how many other women are also in the room, is gay. Watching porn, even gay porn, with one or more women ONLY is straight.

- King Missile, "Gay/Not Gay"

Comment by FredE

FredE — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 17:01:26 -0800

first of all a m-f-m isnt the same as having sex with a man, i mean, you're having sex with another man present but not having sex WITH the man. unless of course you actually do.

secondly drinking a girl drink doesn't make a man gay, but it makes him look wimpy and so unattractive to most straight women. a guy is more likely to drink a girl drink when he's out with his wife or girlfriend if they've been dating for a while but never on a first date and never when out with the guys.

Comment by Irena

Irena — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 17:07:55 -0800

Wow, suddenly football seems really sexy.

Straight guys who mess around with other guys aren't gay, but they are very, very hot! I just don't understand why any man wouldn't want to have sex with a guy at least once. Men's bodies are divine...

Okay, I'm biased. But at least try the mechanical equivalent. You won't regret it!

Comment by max solomon

max solomon — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 17:14:24 -0800

@15:

you sound like my wife. are you my wife?

Comment by RHETT ORACLE

RHETT ORACLE — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 17:55:49 -0800

You want straight guy sex - make a couple of trips on any sort of seagoing vessel. Especially one with cadets.

James Dean, when questioned about his sexual preferences, asked: "Should I go through life with one arm tied behind my back?"

Well, if he didn't say it - he should have. Maybe Marlon said it.

Comment by no more pseudos

no more pseudos — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 18:36:32 -0800

What kind of effete pusillanimous "others" does this guy hang around with? It can seem to others -- when ordering a margarita at the 'wrong' location -- that you are dull, living vicariously through your drink."

People who think my blended margarita ordering ass is dull and or gay can suck my straight white dick.

Comment by me

me — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 19:43:57 -0800

RE: Dan's comment about:

Guy has same-sex sexual experience=gay
Woman does the same=still straight

Reason? Sexism. Women acting like straight men? Arguabley, no problem. Men acting like straight women? Big problem.

The bias against gay men is really a bias against women and femininity.

I will note, however, that many straight women aren't too keen on the LUG thing at all. Men are a-okay with it, generally. And I don't really think it's that common.

Comment by Original Andrew

Original Andrew — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 21:00:47 -0800

curious straight girl @ 9,

Ok, I'll field this one. Being a good bottom takes practice (for most anyway), lots and lots of practice. This means starting out small--one or two fingers--then working your way up. Always use gallons of lube and a high quality condom. Don't forget to breathe! And go S L O W, at least at first. It's best to just leave it in for a minute or two before your guy starts jack-hammerin' away.

Now men have this walnut-shaped do-hickey called a prostate, and anal sex is the best way to stimulate it. I'm a top, so hitting that magic spot the right way is my special job. Hit it right, and your partner will see fireworks--guaranteed. I have no idea if women have a prostate (Sorry, gals!), but I certainly hope so 'cause it makes the whole thing worthwhile.

There are lots of reasons why men are limp while getting it in porn. They may in fact be straight. But delayed gratification seems to be the name of the game in porn, so they almost always hold off to the very end (even though the people watching porn may only need about six minutes if that).

Comment by Irena

Irena — Fri, 09 Nov 2007 21:45:59 -0800

@20,

You definitely don't need a prostate to see fireworks! Or so I've been told...

Comment by Wolf

Wolf — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 07:30:52 -0800

I want one of these "football players." Preferably furry and bearded. Take me, you brute!

I mean, uh, score! Go team!

Comment by Jim

Jim — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 10:45:35 -0800

What I noticed in the excerpt that you posted was that a threesome was defined as gay activity without any requirement that the guys were involved with each other.

Now, it may be true that the actual study required more contact than indicated in the excerpt, but I would be leery of drawing conclusions about gay football players based on the prevalence of two jocks banging a cheerleader at the same time.

As another poster noted, it is also questionable practice to draw broad conclusions based on a tiny sample size like this.

Comment by Bud

Bud — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 11:33:42 -0800

At #23, In a MFM threesome, it's all about whether there's any crossing of swords or balls-to-balls contact. If the balls don't touch, you're straight as an arrow, even if you're turned on by both the other guy and the girl. But if the balls should accidentally graze against each other, for example, then you're a flaming homo. By the way, regarding the wordsleery/wary/weary -- was that a Freudian slip? Haha.

Comment by Irena

Irena — Sat, 10 Nov 2007 14:22:29 -0800

@16,

No, Max, I'm not your wife. Hope you're taking her advice, though!

Comment by violet_dagrinder

violet_dagrinder — Sun, 11 Nov 2007 07:18:55 -0800

Yeah, the one-drop rule is utter bullshit. Where is the discussion of bisexuality here?

Why can there never be shades of gray for men?

Some of those married cocksuckers are actually in love with their wives, and have had good sex lives with them at some point. Why is the assumption that they're closeted? Wouldn't the more reasonable first guess about these guys be that they're bi?

Pfft.