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Saturday, November 17, 2007

Morning News

posted by on November 17 at 8:34 AM

posted by news intern Brian Slodysko

Not resigning anytime soon: Hugo Chavez revises Venezuelan Constitution, mandates sweeping socialist reforms.

Sedition: 15,000 Pakistani troops headed towards Pakistan’s northern border to quell extremists.

Lynnwood PD corruption: FBI tailed deputy chief as he ditched shredded papers in dumpsters prior to raid of his home.

Breaking news: Giuliani pushed for increased health care coverage as mayor of New York, not as conservative as he says.

Back to the table: Studios forced to negotiate with writers as shows switch to re-runs.

One small step above LaRouche: Ron Paul supporters raided by FBI for minting “Liberty Dollars” bearing Paul’s likeness.

Catch a bus this holiday season: Gas prices expected to hit all time seasonal high.

Department of no shit Sherlock: Scientists say pesky issue of global warming must be addressed, suggest U.S. and China sign Kyoto Protocol.

This week in steroids: Prosecutors waited until Bonds broke Aaron’s record before proceeding with indictment.

An inconvenient pain in the ass: Al Gore going to White House to be honored by man who stole election from him and still won’t sign Kyoto Protocol.

Harvard football player: kicks the shit out of people on the field, sings Pavarotti in his spare time.

RSS icon Comments

1

It's LaRouche, not Larusch. LaDouche is also an acceptable pejorative.

Posted by tsm | November 17, 2007 9:20 AM
2

Already taken care of.

Posted by Brian | November 17, 2007 9:23 AM
3

Sullivan may say "ooh, unfair, unfair", but Ron Paul really does need to address the fact that his campaign is bringing out tons of America's creepiest weirdos from the caves they've been living in since Ruby Ridge. Montana Freemen, white power loons and neo-Nazis, Federal Reserve abolishers, militiamen, black helicopter people, the nuts stockpiling weapons against the invasion from Canada, alternate currency freaks -- it's the whole underbelly of paranoid right-wingery.

Paul has always derived support from them, but if he wants to pretend he's on a national stage now, he needs to cut them off at the knees. I hope he doesn't, and somehow wins the nomination, because it would be funny to see Clinton get 80% of the vote.

Posted by fnarf | November 17, 2007 12:22 PM
4

Wonderin' if Bush'll furnish the Gores with Air Force One so they won't have to fly commercial to Oslo for the Nobel ceremonies on December 10. Or am I Marie of Roumania? [ref. Dorothy Parker]

Posted by RHETT ORACLE | November 17, 2007 3:49 PM
5

So I take it Charles will approve of Chavez's move? I mean it IS for Socialism.........

Posted by New Deal Demoncrat | November 17, 2007 4:59 PM
6

You can lead a Gore to culture, but you can't make him think.

Posted by Natalya | November 17, 2007 8:06 PM
7

@6 - good riff.

For full text of the Marie of Roumania reference, see:

http://www.quotationspage.com/quote/126.html

Posted by RHETT ORACLE | November 18, 2007 11:11 AM

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