Slog - Comments on Little Hoods

Comment by Adam on Alki

Adam on Alki — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:26:36 -0800

Ahhh! They start 'em so young!

Comment by Just Me

Just Me — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:33:37 -0800

Dan, you must demand the death sentence. Anything less and the terrorists will win!!!

Comment by mattymatt

mattymatt — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:39:46 -0800

What? Srsly? Ferreal? Is this a joke? It's kind of insane if it's true -- that there's some adult running around your neighborhood in the dead of night with an army of Oliver-Twistian child bandits.

Comment by YO

YO — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:43:17 -0800

Ugh...

I bet those kids parents are straight.

Comment by atlsea

atlsea — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:45:55 -0800

See what happens when you go off to commit sodomy at the Davenport in Spokane? All hell breaks loose.

Only closeted Republicans are allowed to have their private butt sex and pumpkins too.

Comment by Bauhaus

Bauhaus — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:54:31 -0800

What kind of neighborhood is it that has adults out supervising their small children destroying someone else's property at night?

Comment by Donna The Dead

Donna The Dead — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 15:57:33 -0800

Is this a hate crime or am I reading too much into it?

Comment by lymerae

lymerae — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:02:54 -0800

Um, dunno if I'm imagining things, but I assumed Dan & Co manufactured this as a joke and as a way to get rid of their no-longer-needed pumpkins. Child vandals, really?

Comment by Seriously

Seriously — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:03:30 -0800

Oh wow. Notice how the adult filming it keeps saying to the kids, "no names, don't use our names" to keep them from identifying each other?

Comment by Raphael - voting Della

Raphael - voting Della — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:07:45 -0800

some of the posters here are almost beyond gullible

Dan and Co. set this up - yes it is a joke - yes it is shameless self PROMOTING

no it is not a hate crime - is it Strange, of course

Comment by wench

wench — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:14:15 -0800

Funny, I always wondered who it was who destroyed all the pumpkins. Now I know. ;)

My bet is on one of the Sloggers. 'Fess up, now.

Comment by Phred Meijer

Phred Meijer — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:14:59 -0800

Maybe it was stefan sharkansky and his brood, after another night of undertipping waitresses.

Comment by Irena

Irena — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:16:21 -0800

It was probably that creep across the street with the grave! JEALOUS!!!

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:17:53 -0800

Yes, R, it's all about self-promotion. Because I stand so much to gain from this. Like, um... riches. Untold riches.

Actually, I think it was our neighbors. I recognize one of them. And we'll get 'em back. They have chickens. Maybe I'll wring some necks in the dead of night.

Comment by Drew

Drew — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:20:22 -0800

Its like a herd of Jawas attacking the pumpkins. Best Star Wars parody ever!

Comment by Irena

Irena — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:21:51 -0800

And then post a video of yourself choking the chicken?

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:23:03 -0800

Exactly.

Comment by No Names!

No Names! — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:24:02 -0800

You think that was your neighbor? Hmm. That guy's voice sounded way too poor-white-trash to be from your neck of the woods.

Comment by weird

weird — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:29:52 -0800

Maybe it was the long absent Ecce Homo. That's pretty petty though, if it's not a joke.

Comment by Natalie

Natalie — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:36:03 -0800

I'll never get that 1:22 back. If those kids weren't such weaklings the video would have been much better. By better I mean shorter.

Comment by Raphael -- go Della

Raphael -- go Della — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:36:44 -0800

so sorry Dan - GOD - midnight trashing from neighbor to neighbor

what a hood

perhaps someone who works at the Weekly?

or just a fool or two with kids who likes the true spirit of bad ass Halloween?

lucky they didn't topple your outhouse as well

Comment by Paul In SF

Paul In SF — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:43:19 -0800

We need to track those vandals down. Maybe we can get Dog Chapman to do it. I understand he has some time on his hands now.

Comment by Jack

Jack — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:46:00 -0800

Dan - free legal advice, never threaten malice to the neighborhood pets - big time bad stuff in this state

rotting pumpkin does not = killing pet chickens

Comment by KELLY O

KELLY O — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:47:57 -0800

#20 - is 1:22 that much to lose? On the internet?
You remind me of my dad yelling at the microwave, "C'mon, I don't have ALL MINUTE!"

Comment by JOHN IN SLC

JOHN IN SLC — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:49:26 -0800

Dan has an outhouse? Is this in the city or very rural sort of woods, typical NW place?

Comment by zucchi

zucchi — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:50:23 -0800

Dan, how did you find out about the evidence on the YouTube?

Comment by Lesley

Lesley — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:52:08 -0800

Dan-
How did you happen to come across the video on Youtube? It's only tagged with "Savage".

Comment by Michigan Matt

Michigan Matt — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:53:56 -0800

This is yet another reason I'll never move to Seattle--too much gang-related crime. Oh, the horror!

Hysterical.

Comment by GW

GW — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:57:15 -0800

I thought it was funny. And those cute kids probably had no idea why they were there, but they just thought it was fun to bash pumpkins. Curious who the guy taking the video was though.

Comment by wench

wench — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 16:58:14 -0800

C'mon, the guy says "no names," but he films the kid's face clear as day? Oh, and I like the fake accent. =)

Comment by zucchi

zucchi — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:00:40 -0800

#28 Maybe so, if it was DJ himself with his friends. Otherwise, DJ might get upset. I would, if it was my handiwork's untimely demise.

Comment by pdl

pdl — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:14:59 -0800

I think it was SuttonBeresCuller!

Comment by Zander

Zander — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:23:42 -0800

Obviously, these jack-o-laterns weren't ripe. Traditionally, they should be allowed to rot for a week to add that disgusting squishy distegration factor.

Comment by jseattle

jseattle — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:30:39 -0800

Sigh. You can tell by the sound of the roaring jetplane that it is really Capitol Hill. As to whether it is really vandalism, you be the judge.

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:32:39 -0800

I received an anonymous email tipping me off.

Comment by RainMan

RainMan — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:37:29 -0800

Dan, instead of strangling the chickens how about force feeding them the remains of the pumpkins? Poetic justice at its best.

Comment by Just Me

Just Me — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:44:18 -0800

Of course it is Dan and Co!!! You can hear Dan talking in the background. And we all knew it, we were just playing around in the spirit of the moment. Some of you need to pull the rods out of your asses and have some fun for once on Slog. You are starting to act like a bunch of Republicans.

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:53:36 -0800

Actually, it happened while we were out of town. I have receipts to prove that I was in Spokane at the time of the crime.

Comment by Michigan Matt

Michigan Matt — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:58:01 -0800

I'm so confused! Are we supposed to be angry?! How should I feel? Should we send hatemail somewhere, Dan?

Perhaps Desperate Housewives will help . . .

Comment by atlsea

atlsea — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 17:59:45 -0800

See, I told you all this stuff always happens when doing the nasty at some upitty hotel in Spokane while doing the nasty.

Karma.

Comment by Paul In SF

Paul In SF — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:05:29 -0800

strangling the chicken? I always choke mine. Have been doing it that way since I was 13 or so.

Comment by zucchi

zucchi — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:12:35 -0800

I'd reuse the stakes... for the chicken. Revenge!

Comment by clarity

clarity — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:27:44 -0800

You know, parents really need to learn how to be parents not "best friends". It creeps me out that a parent would take their small children out to vandalize someone else's property. I may have toilet papered a house or two in my day but I was 13, the other kids were 13, and my parents had nothing to do with it. Know why? Because they were parents and real parents don't act like 13 year olds.

Comment by Mike in MO

Mike in MO — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:29:27 -0800

This reminds me of a story from my wild youth. We drove around town stealing pumpkins to smash and throw at each other until we found "The Great Pumpkin." Easily 100 lbs and about three feet across. We loaded it into the back of my tiny pickup and went out to some deserted area to demolish it. We decided that the best way to kill it was to run it over, not realizing the damage a 100 lb pumpkin (solid, not carved) would do to the bumper of a rust pick up.

Well, you can probably guess the rest. The Great Pumpkin got the last laugh on that one...

Comment by Just saying

Just saying — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:37:40 -0800

Wasn't Smashing Pumpkins the name of a band from the early '90s?

Comment by Wolf

Wolf — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 18:49:32 -0800

Assuming this is for real--doesn't something like this make you feel violated somehow? I mean, they're on your property messing with your stuff.

I'd be out for BLOOD.

Comment by violet_dagrinder

violet_dagrinder — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 19:27:26 -0800

Yeah, maybe whomever did that thought it was funny, but. . . I wouldn't take it that way, if it were my yard. Not with an adult involved.

Maybe that makes me a giant douche, dunno.

Comment by Explorer

Explorer — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 19:51:56 -0800

To the point raised @ 43, I wonder if the parent involved here is also one of those Capitol Hill "conscientious modern parents" who can't bear to tell their kid 'no' when passing by Red Balloon.

Comment by Ivan Cockrum

Ivan Cockrum — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 20:10:09 -0800

If it's just a neighborly prank, all well and good, but Dan, the fact is that posting identifying photos of your home opens you to pranksterism and worse from star stalkers or those in strong disagreement with your views. Just sayin' be careful, y'know?

Comment by santa claus

santa claus — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 20:29:04 -0800

I like to sneak around my neighborhood in the night when all the Christmas decorations are put out. My target: those electric reindeer. I always position them so once reindeer is humping the others.

It's all in good fun and yes, it's sad, but dammit, it's tradition.

Comment by carolina bob

carolina bob — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 20:45:15 -0800

I'm moving to Seattle soon from North Carolina and I had planned to move to Capitol Hill, but these roving child gangs sound like a serious problem. I thought I saw bad child gangs when I went to Russia, but it was nothing compared to this!

I think I'll move to Federal Way, where people treat each other right.

Comment by Mr. Poe

Mr. Poe — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 20:50:14 -0800

AAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!!!!1!

No, really. That's funny, Dan.

Comment by mmbb

mmbb — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 21:07:13 -0800

Dan says, "I have receipts to prove that I was in Spokane at the time of the crime."

I would be more interested in actual proof that you filed a police report. Please scan and post a censored copy of said report.

Comment by JessB

JessB — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 21:19:52 -0800

@50 LOL That's great man.

Comment by PA Native

PA Native — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 21:41:30 -0800

Longest and slowest punkin smashing ever.

Comment by redletter

redletter — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 22:04:53 -0800

Those kids seriously need to eat their Wheaties.

*is so unimpressed*

Comment by Jill

Jill — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 05:43:52 -0800

Hmm, I DID hear a laugh mysteriously similar to the one on my favorite podcast...

Comment by Moltarr

Moltarr — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 06:13:34 -0800

Some of my warmest memories of my dad are those where we were committing vandalism together. Blowing crap up with firecrackers, shaving cream in mailboxes, and throwing hostess Sno-Balls onto a tennis court! So bad, but so fun.

There are some real category-5 fuddy-duddies here. "How could an adult do this? My goodness!"

Comment by gEoRGE BusH

gEoRGE BusH — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 08:55:33 -0800

i bet there mammy had luv handLes.

Comment by poster girl

poster girl — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 09:34:18 -0800

Those kids are lucky to have a dad who will pull shit like that. Bravo!
Now who could it be? Certainly not the family across the street who had the dead Trick or Treater display.
Everybody: don't move to Seattle because with your voter's resignation you get a stick jammed up your ass.

Comment by Alice

Alice — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:07:31 -0800

hi,

i must be one of your denser readers, because i'm really confused right now. when i first read this, i burst out laughing... the text you put with the video is so deadpan i instantly thought it was a joke... you know, like you took your kid out with a friend and let them bash the pumpkins for fun and shits and giggles, and waved a flashlight around. and of course you taped it because it's hysterical and cute. "the authorities have been notified"... awww cute! but now it looks like you're being serious? someone you don't know actually vandalized your pumpkins? i'm not used to devoting so much thought to your column and i'm already bored of teh debate, so can someone just clear this up? was it a joke?

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:15:38 -0800

We dined with the perps last night, Alice. Hatchet buried.

Comment by pain

pain — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:24:53 -0800

did you get revenge last night by serving them their family pets?

"Enjoying the rosemary roasted chicken, Bob? Well I'm sure you enjoyed Clucky's company when she was alive too! Bwahahahaha!"

Comment by cochise.

cochise. — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:32:34 -0800

@62 you killed them? with a hatchet?

Comment by Dan Savage

Dan Savage — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:52:32 -0800

Yes.

Comment by M

Mon, 05 Nov 2007 11:53:45 -0800

You dined with them? Did they contact you or did you track them down? And dining with those obnoxious kids?? The world has gone mad.......