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Uhhhh... Sounders?

Posted by Paulus | November 15, 2007 3:01 AM

hasn't anyone seen what European teams are named? Liverpool FC, Chelsea FC, Real Madrid, AC Milan.

Arsenal and Juventus are outlier names. Most are named after the cities or borroughs. Then the nicknames are added by the fans.

Posted by clarkj | November 15, 2007 4:31 AM

Seattle FC, nickname "The Sonics".

Posted by max solomon | November 15, 2007 9:12 AM

The "God, how I wish I were European so I could make some fucking money playing this sports."

Posted by Gitai | November 15, 2007 9:18 AM


Posted by Bellevue Ave | November 15, 2007 9:19 AM

The Seattle Footballs.

Posted by Mr. Poe | November 15, 2007 9:27 AM

Isn't it obvious? The Hipsters.

Posted by Mike in MO | November 15, 2007 9:28 AM

PC Seattle

Posted by fixo | November 15, 2007 9:31 AM

The Seattle Thighmasters.

Posted by It's Mark Mitchell | November 15, 2007 9:31 AM

As I sit here with my coffee, I think "The Seattle Buzzing Beans" sounds good to me.

Posted by Mike of Renton | November 15, 2007 9:36 AM

The Seattle Queens

Posted by whatever | November 15, 2007 9:38 AM

I still stand by my submission of "Bloodthirsty tri-headed unicorns of Valhalla"

Posted by Joh | November 15, 2007 9:38 AM

Seattle Slough

Posted by NealH | November 15, 2007 9:41 AM

The I-5'n White Guys.

Posted by I love my hourlong commute | November 15, 2007 9:41 AM

Puppets of FEAR.

Posted by kid icarus | November 15, 2007 9:42 AM

The Seattle Holy Crap Soccer Players Are Hot.

Posted by sean | November 15, 2007 9:46 AM

Am I the only person to remember The Tacoma Stars??

Yeah, yeah Tacoma is sooooo ooooo oooooo different from Seattle, we can't name our team The Seattle Stars because that would mean dirty Tacoma trash would think they could come to Seattle.

I suggest The Seattle Stars so there can be some fucking continuity with Washington Soccer teams.

Posted by Dee in SF | November 15, 2007 9:47 AM

Green River Killers

Posted by monkey | November 15, 2007 9:47 AM

In the spirit of MLS swiping European club names for effect (DC United, Real Salt Lake, FC Dallas)... just call them Seattle Rovers.

Posted by Gomez | November 15, 2007 9:54 AM

Tacoma trash should stay in Tacoma, Dee. If they want to watch soccer, they can watch The Big Green.

Posted by Mr. Poe | November 15, 2007 9:55 AM

I'm going to suggest a name that will surprise you with it's originality and germane qualities.


Now, can we rename the Sonics to OK! Go! already and kick them out the door?

Posted by Will in Seattle | November 15, 2007 9:57 AM

FC Attle.

Posted by RonK, Seattle | November 15, 2007 10:05 AM


Posted by dirty girl | November 15, 2007 10:05 AM

Seattle Steelhead

Posted by COMTE | November 15, 2007 10:10 AM

I'm going to second the suggestion from #14

Posted by me | November 15, 2007 10:15 AM

Not descriptive or inclusive enough. A good start would be "Chief Sealth, Emerald, Rat, Latte, Literary, Cancer Treatment, and Jet City Goal Makers and Preventers of Reciprocal Goals."

There are no sports teams with names like that. We would be the very first.

Posted by elenchos | November 15, 2007 10:16 AM

Come on, Green River Killers is brilliant.

Posted by Nat | November 15, 2007 10:17 AM

Seattle Hooligans.

Posted by DOUG. | November 15, 2007 10:18 AM

We can honor our cultural icons and call the team the Seattle Shotguns. Either that or the Prayer Warriors.

Posted by dirge | November 15, 2007 10:19 AM

The Dirty Jews.

Posted by heywhatsit | November 15, 2007 10:19 AM

Yes, Green River Killers FTW.

Posted by kid icarus | November 15, 2007 10:20 AM

For once I agree with Will. They've already got a name, Sounders.

American soccer teams with "euro" names make me want to rape and pillage. Your average Brit can and does spend a full five minutes turning over "Real Salt Lake" on his tongue in wonder and contempt. "Dynamo Houston" is almost as bad. They're not "United" anything, and they're not "Rovers" or "Wanderers" either.Technically they're not an FC.

I would accept a regional name, like Seattle Sodo (a la Paris Saint Germain, or Crystal Palace, also commemorating a demolished building). How about Seattle Royal Brougham?

Posted by Fnarf | November 15, 2007 10:25 AM

I rescind my above submission, and request the team be named the "Phallic Geoduck Warblers"

Posted by Joh | November 15, 2007 10:26 AM

The Seattle Arsenal sounds pretty good to me.

Or, how about the Wapatoes?

Posted by Greg | November 15, 2007 10:28 AM

The Geoducks
The Brazen Hussies
The Weyerhauser (tm) Lumberjacks
Paul Allen Agonistes
Miss Lulu Regrets
The Morning After

I must say, Green River Killers is great.

Posted by Gurldoggie | November 15, 2007 10:30 AM

Green River Killers. I volunteer to wear the Gary Ridgeway mascot costume and get chased around the field by Dave Reichert. He'll need something to do after he loses the next election, right?

Posted by Hernandez | November 15, 2007 10:31 AM

Seattle's Little Urban Team


Posted by Heather | November 15, 2007 10:33 AM

What's with "Green River Killers"? Did I miss something?

Posted by Mike in MO | November 15, 2007 10:37 AM

-The Pitbulls
-The Storm
-The Suicide kings
-The Snake goats
-The I've-got-a-problem-with-everything
-Nickel's Posse of Rain Dawgs with lobster claws and T. Rex breath!
-The Pounders

I liked "the Seattle Footballers".

Posted by mongo like slog | November 15, 2007 10:38 AM

Los gabachos

Posted by SeMe | November 15, 2007 10:41 AM

One more: Patches Pals.

Posted by I love my hourlong commute | November 15, 2007 10:41 AM

I don't see why they can't still be the Sounders. The name has history, refers to something unambiguously local, and is alliterative.

Other possibilities:

Seattle Salmonbellies (OK, so it's already taken)
Seattle Salish (for the inevitable Native American angle)
Seattle Sucks (describing the team's performance and the average residents attitude about their city)
Seattle Storm (since we're probably losing the current team)
Seattle Software Developers
Seattle SLUT (sponsored by the streetcar)
Seattle Soccer (for the overly literal)
Seattle Strikers (combines relevant sports terminology with local labor history)
Seattle Process
Seattle Nice
Seattle SAD
Washington Whiners
Northwest Naysayers
Cascadia Kickers

Posted by Cascadian | November 15, 2007 10:46 AM

Here art thou, Mike in Mo:

Posted by informationalistic | November 15, 2007 10:48 AM

Seattle Suicides or The Seattle Reign?

Posted by A Toast to the Ghost | November 15, 2007 10:52 AM

I've been very excited about this announcement, but I was hoping they'd stick with Sounders.

Posted by Gabriel | November 15, 2007 10:55 AM

I thought Colorado was going to take the Arsenal name. Their stadium is built on the Rocky Mountain Arsenal, after all, and they've got some nonsense partnership with the actual Arsenal.

How about IF Seattle? Make it kind of Scandinavian...

Posted by Abby | November 15, 2007 10:59 AM

The problem with Sounders is that, at least for now, that name is taken. No decision has been announced on their future; it's possible they could stay in business but move elsewhere in the area (the Kitsap has been mentioned).

Posted by bigyaz | November 15, 2007 11:00 AM

"The Seattle Holy Crap Soccer Players Are Hot."


Posted by heh | November 15, 2007 11:02 AM

The Pitbulls! Why didn't I think of that?!?!

Also, thanks for the The Green River Killer link. Wow, y'all are twisted.

Posted by Mike in MO | November 15, 2007 11:11 AM

Seattle Chokers

We should name a team after Seattle's true pro spirit.

Posted by poster girl | November 15, 2007 11:12 AM

Not that you guys have any lack of inspiration, but I thought this was neat:

"The Green River Killers" is so great! My suggestion is sans irony and pales by comparison:

Elliot Bay Roughs

Posted by tabletop_joe | November 15, 2007 11:30 AM

I like the idea best of keeping SOUNDERS.

Though, SeMe, Gabachos is good. Would immediately increase Latino attendence.

Dollars to doughnuts, though, they go conservative rah-rah and select...


What does it mean? It means *everything*!

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | November 15, 2007 11:35 AM

Sega Sonic Hedgehog

Posted by Mark Kaufman | November 15, 2007 11:41 AM

I want their name to be the Sounders. :( I watched them in the Kingdome in the 70s! Remember when Pele came to town to play a game?

I am guessing the Portland Timbers fans don't want the Seattle MLS team named the Sounders, it's against their religion to root for a team named the Sounders. Bah.

Posted by Kristi in Kitsap | November 15, 2007 11:51 AM

Olympic Seattle

Posted by Oscar | November 15, 2007 11:56 AM

Seattle Beans
Seattle Starboeingsofts
Seattle Inevitable Quakes
Seattle Lahar

(I really like that last one).

Posted by Lou | November 15, 2007 11:59 AM

Maybe Kickers instead of Strikers? Then they could be a lower-division German team.

Posted by Abby | November 15, 2007 12:00 PM

When I hear the name Sounders, I automatically get a negative association with the act of Sounding.

Look it up on xtube.

Posted by UNPAID BLOGGER | November 15, 2007 12:09 PM

Seattle Passive Agressives

Seattle Salmon Slingers

Seattle Sound

Posted by cooper | November 15, 2007 12:11 PM

Seattle Passive Agressives

Seattle Salmon Slingers

Seattle Sound

Posted by cooper | November 15, 2007 12:11 PM

Well, given the usual above, I've actually got a name that represents the community perfectly: the Seattle Ambivalence.

Posted by Gomez | November 15, 2007 12:23 PM

Seriously, Sounders is the way to go. Moving all that great, if relatively little known, history of the past and current team to Kitsap sounds like something only a cock would do.

Posted by InExile | November 15, 2007 12:39 PM

Most of us want them to be the Seattle Sounders, actually.

Posted by Will in Seattle | November 15, 2007 12:44 PM

Seattle Cyclenistas
Seattle Smack
Seattle Dark Cloud of Death
Seattle Sonics - Football Titans of the World (Sonics FTW for short)
Seattle Subcultures. "Joe" would be the mascot

Posted by Anonymous | November 15, 2007 12:47 PM

Seattle Portable Meth Labs

Posted by Lou | November 15, 2007 12:59 PM


SC Seattle Sounders!

(SC= Soccer Club)

Posted by DeJay | November 15, 2007 1:04 PM

You guys are all close...The Oklahoma City Sounders.

Posted by Sam M. | November 15, 2007 1:33 PM

No, that's the OK Go! Sonics!

Posted by Will in Seattle | November 15, 2007 1:40 PM

The Ballard Ball-Kickers

Posted by butterw | November 15, 2007 2:14 PM

Seattle Riot
Seattle Buzz
Seattle Silent Seethers
Seattle Blue Screens
Seattle Mascots Which Are Not In Any Way Evocative of Ethnic Stereotypes

Posted by tsm | November 15, 2007 2:15 PM

The Seattle Freeze.

Posted by I love my hourlong commute | November 15, 2007 3:44 PM

Seattle Bytes

Posted by Joe | November 15, 2007 4:16 PM

The Seattle Salmon, with colors pink and silver.

Posted by RonS | November 15, 2007 4:40 PM

Seattle Sounders

4 League Championships, and a ton of history connected to that name.

Posted by Sean | November 15, 2007 4:52 PM

How about the Seattle Savages? Their nickname could be "The Dan's."

Posted by MirrorMan | November 15, 2007 5:35 PM

This sums up what is wrong with football (soccer) in America! All this razzmatazz nonsense! Just call it Seattle! Why jazz it up with a corny sounding name that sounds silly! This kind of influence on the game is what is starting to ruin it in England with the focus on momey and not the fans.

Posted by Boro Betting Boy | November 16, 2007 1:07 AM

@76: Seattle sports teams, like pretty much all American sports teams, have names and mascots. That's just what we do. It's our thing, kay? Don't be hatin' just because we've got our own style, man.

Posted by Greg | November 16, 2007 10:24 AM

The "Gulls"

The "Drews"

The "Black Glasses"

The "Muffin Tops"

Posted by erik | November 17, 2007 7:52 AM

Greg nobody is hating your style my friend! I just think plain old Seattle FC or SC as you like to call it Soccer would set a trend Stateside! It's like us calling our teams Liverpool Lions or Manchester United Mohawks! Just a bit daft in my opinion!

Posted by Boro Betting Boy | November 22, 2007 7:40 AM

Seattle Rage
Seattle Stars
Seattle Soldiers
Seattle Snipers
Seattle Strikers

Posted by mike | November 22, 2007 8:28 PM

I've gotta say.. we should definitely set the trend by going with SC SEATTLE instead of FC SEATTLE. This is america, we already have an FC SEATTLE, but they wear helmets and are known as the seahawks.

Posted by stubble | November 26, 2007 2:44 PM

I like the "Green river killers"
Seattle murderous rampage?
Seattle Grind (come out to the AIC song as well)
Seattle serial killers?
Seattle timbersheep?
Seattle lemmings?

Posted by not sounders | November 26, 2007 9:01 PM

I think that the "Seattle Birkenstocks with Socks" sounds nice.

Posted by Rooney for President | November 26, 2007 9:17 PM

Seattle junkies
Seattle mountaineers
Seattle hikers
Seattle REI shoppers
Seattle dealers
The Green Manlishi's

Posted by not sounders | November 26, 2007 9:18 PM

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