Just the other day, some guy at a bus stop did this at me: "Psh psh psh." Now I don't know what's worse: having a man loudly comment on my body, or having a man treat me like a stray animal.

Then I bought him a beer and we took this photograph. Then I framed it and gave it to my dad for Xmas. The end.

"hey faggot!"

and

"have some eggs."

http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/mis/447090150.html

However, the male experience is much different. I can't tell you how pleased I would be if someone holla-ed at me.

@17 - i inexplicably ended up at finn macs on monday night, and two newly-minted 21 year old hoochie bitches had signs pinned to their skanky dresses that read "i'm 21, someone fuck me".

So the guy you seek was probably at that bar.

Since I was a young girl I have always detested it when a guy yelled out a car window or tried to pick me up. It has always freaked me out and I find it very degrading.I do have a few girl friends and a sister who would get a thrill out of it and they all ended up marrying abusive creeps!
But that is just me : )

Girls are just as aggressive today so you are totally right!

Go to The Cuff. You'll learn real fast what the ladies go through.

Oh, but you have to be under the age of 25 to get the FA.

(i hope that's okay.)

Well, if you look anything like Anderson Cooper, you'll get a holla from me.

Also some are misguided about how exactly to do step 2 of the below.
1. Realise need to fuck.
2. Convince girl to fuck.
3. Fuck.
Education would be helpful in the form of bricks, perhaps with notes stuck to them?

I've also got a water pistol full of housepaint.

Threats and reasoning do nothing to get through to this type of bozo - you gotta go for his ride.

furthermore, it sounds like it is a big deal to him. but he doesn't want it to seem like it is, so he has to say it's not -- without sounding like he doesn't actually like them altogether.

it gave me a headache.

it wasn't cute. cute is: i've seen you at the library often, and i think i've developed a crush. why else do you think i keep thinking up questions about the antiquated dewey decimal system to ask you?

It does frustrate me beyond all reason when other women respond positively to that bullshit. But, as with many other things, there's not a damn thing I can do about it, except make sure that I don't reward those knuckledraggers with a smile or my phone number.

some, however, also put off a vibe that seems to suggest that women are too delicate -- that any holla should be illegal as if an act of violence. poor taste yes. illegal? i'm not so sure.

but there is another issue. the overt sexual nature of some of these hollas. because of this, the recipient might fear for thier safety. if you are walking alone, and someone else in a vehicle shouts something inappropriate, it's not just rude and/or insulting; it can actually cause fear. i think of the stories i've heard of guys following women for a while, or circling around just staring. that sort of behavior is a violation of a person's well-beling. the frequency in which such actions (not just words) occur makes it more of a problem.

since most guys (at least most guys i know) are not complete assholes, they don't holla out obviously inappropriate things. this means their experience with such situations is very limited, and this makes it hard to understand why it is so upsetting.

in addition, as k mentions above, some women actually respond positively to these things. though i'm not sure where k draws the line between appropriate and inappropriate...

just out of curiousity, what sort of act/comment would you consider harassment in it's least form (just over the line). "yo let's fuck." over the line. "there must some pussy under that ass." over the line. but both are way over the line.

and also PS I am Not talking about preludes to rape.

It differs according to the woman. Some are offended by a simple "Hello beautiful." Others, such as myself, reserve indignation for eyeball rape, being followed on foot/by car, creepy staring, obviously insulting gestures and sexualized comments.

Frankly, I think women need to pick our battles and beat down (not literally) the obviously creepy and offensive jerks out there. I hope sites like Hollaback will encourage women to recognize real harassment and stick up for themselves when it happens.

And I'm fairly certain that Fnarf is kidding. He's taken a stand against public harassers on Slog before.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27CNqGMP-lk

Now, the line is a bit more unclear when you are interact face to face. But here's a rule of thumb: if you would like to hit on a girl, don't start with her appearance. That too often is the first step down the road to Creepsterville, and it will set off red flags for any girl who's worth dating. Instead, introduce yourself, ask about her about herself. If she seems receptive and friendly, continue talking. If you have a connection, maybe she will hook up with you.

Seriously, sexuality exists in the world. Some people are going to appreciate your fine self in ways that would raise hairs in the Blue Nose Club, but I don't believe it's harmful. It's just guys being guys.

Any woman who hasn't learned how to shut them up with a smart remark -- surprisingly easy to do -- isn't ready to play in public. It's like wandering out into the street.

The idea that women should at all times be treated with delicacy and concern is ten times more sexist than the idea that a delicious booty is a thing to behold. The idea that we've all somehow agreed to pretend we never even look is freshman women's studies baloney.

And if you can't tell the difference between a sexy comment in the street and sexual harrassment, or sexual violence, you're crazy.

This is ok to you?

“What’s up with your pee-hole, baaaaaby?”

Because it's not ok to me. Any jackass who says that, homeless or no, deserves to be smacked down. Yes, some women are oversensitive, but most aren't. Most have to put up with creepy bullshit a lot. And who's socialized not to fight back? Women, that's who.

I suggest rather that men who think they have a right to holla at women to humiliate them are the ones who are not capable of keeping their "appreciation" of my budunkadunk to themselves are the ones who are not ready to play in public. Why is it up to women to put up with crappy behavior? "Boys will be boys" is the most pansy-assed, buck-passing excuse possible. Yeah, asshole behavior is going to exist, that doesn't mean we should just shut up and take it.

But Fnarf raises a good point as he demonstrates that many men will not even go so far as to condemn shameful behavior by their own gender. Ladies, we SHOULD be ready with a snappy come-back. I find that ones about penis-size to be most effective. For instance: "I've heard about you! Cock the size of a golf pencil, right?"

Is it threatening, creepy, and generally in poor taste for a total stranger to comment on my "pee-hole" or tell me about his "hard-on"? YES. IT IS NOT OKAY. Do I think it should be illegal? Obviously not. That's stupid. And do I scream princess rape if a hobo in Belltown tells me that I "look very nice tonight, young lady"? OF COURSE I DON'T. (Thank you, genteel hobo!)

Demanding respect is not asking for "special treatment." Men are welcome to demand verbal respect as well, but they don't have to, because women don't go around screaming at men about our engorged vaginas. And raping them. And stuff.

Being hollered at is disgusting and often scary. If you do it to me I will yell at you and then make fun of you on the internet. That does not make me a princess. THE END.

Try reading #56. Like exelizabeth, I started getting harassed when I was very young, 10 to be exact. Where exactly was I going to magically get the confidence/wit/assertiveness to deal with that bullshit at that age? It's taken me ~17 years to even start to figure out how to deal with it.

I would love for more women to be empowered to fight back. Unfortunately young girls/young women are the ones most likely to be harassed and they're the ones least likely to be able to deal with it. So what is the solution? Making it illegal obviously isn't going to fly, although I see an argument for jailing and prosecuting men who harass minors.

And, no, my confidence (no longer) gets shattered by those nimrods. Nevertheless, the boys will be boys argument is bullshit, especially as it harms girls and women who are still in a place where it negatively affects them.

So, what's your take on workplace harassment? Should women just come back with witty rejoinders rather than complain to human resources/go to court?

And if men did have to deal with that shit, y'all would be simpering puddles of self-pity.

I also had cars slow down when I was walking alone down the street at night to check me out before making the same discovery.

You're right, it's fucking creepy. I'm not sure that it turned me into a "simpering puddle of self-pity," though. It mostly just made me start thinking about the best direction to take off running if they got out of the car.

I've been hit on by gay men too but that was never anywhere near as creepy. They were almost without exception reasonably polite and complimentary.

The problem I have with statements like the one at Hollaback (" A compliment is not a compliment if it makes the recipient feel bad.") is that it makes it sounds like it's primarily an issue of hurt feelings when it seems like it's more a problem of fear for one's safety, and also because it makes it the line between appropriate and inappropriate behavior entirely dependent on the subjective reaction of the hearer. On some level the same compliment coming from a wildly unattractive person and a wildly unattractive one (I'm not talking about rude shit yelled from cars here, mind you) might be taken differently, depending, but that doesn't seem to be what this is really about.

re: all this "should you retort back" discussion. if you feel someone has gained power over you by yelling something at you, yell back, fight back, whatevs. but if you find it humorous and brush it off, don't yell back. it's all personal preference! and just because you don't choose to retort back doesn't mean you're letting men belittle you (necessarily), or that you were abused as a child, or that you have low self esteem. sometimes you just chuckle and get on your way and remember that when you walk in occidental park around lunch time you better be wearing a turtleneck.