Chow Like Smith Childless?
posted by October 31 at 11:00 AMon
Then you better get in there fast.
I was blogging last night from Smith, Linda Derschang’s newish place on 15th, simultaneously attempting to digest anti-gay GOP state rep Richard Curtis’ 15 page police report and a beet salad, chicken pot pie, and pot de creme. And I learned some welcome news about Smith when I was paying up: Later this week a tasteful railing will be installed around Smith’s bar—and you know that means, Seattle.
Once the Liquor Control Board drops by, checks out the rail, and gives the okay under-21s will be welcome at Smith. My son, age nine, is going to be be psyched. He’s sick of hearing his dads rave about all the Smith burgers and pots de creme and devils on horseback that we’ve wolfed down while he’s been away on play dates and sleepovers. But now he’ll get to join us a booth or one of the communal tables for a burger. Good news.
Yes, yes: We over-21s are losing a precious grownups-only watering hole. But admitting under-21s didn’t exactly ruin Six Arms, did it? And grownups still have exclusive use of Linda’s and Liberty and the Comet and the Eagle and dozens of other bars all over town.
But in the interest of promoting harmony between child-free and the child-full communities as we prepare to share Smith, let me say this to my fellow Capitol Hill parents: If you can’t control your fucking kids, dumbfucks, don’t take your fucking kids into fucking restaurants.
Just as responsible pit-bull owners—both of them—are angered by the behavior of irresponsible pit-bull owners, responsible parents—the kind of parents that keep their kids under control at all times in restaurants—are angered by parents that bring out-of-control brats into restaurants. My kid is under control in restaurants because his parents don’t want to ruin your meal anymore than his parents want some other parents’ kids to ruin their meal.
So, I’m sorry, but I’ll be bringing my kid to Smith. With the exception of the Great Cake Licking Incident at Septeime a several years ago—it’s a long story—my son is good in restaurants and bars. You won’t even notice him sitting with us in the booth near the beer cooler, Smith regulars, I swear.