Chewy. Duh.

Donald Trump is clearly Jabba the Hut.

Hillary is indeed Leia, who as we know fights along side her lover Han during the original movies and then becomes a primary leader of the "New Republic" in the post-"Jedi" era chronicled in the various novels and comic books of the franchise's "extended universe."

During this time, Leia gives speeches encouraging moderation while Han and Luke (Bill and Rahm?) go off to fight back the remaining fragments of the Empire (Haliburton) with the help of Ewoks (Code Pink), Droids (TPMmedia), and Wookies (VoteVets).

Kucinich is an Ewok. No, really.

So...that means that Don Rumsfeld is Grand Moff Tarkin, right? And Al Gore is a sort of Lando Calrissian? I'd be interested to hear what Charles has to say about all of this...

Erik Prince is Boba Fett

And Mary Cheney as R2D2, with special guest star Jeff Gannon as C3PO

@5: No, Obama is Lando. I would have thought that was obvious!

Hey you guys, it really hurts when I have to roll my eyes that far back into my head.

Just sayin.

No Star Wars analogy works because in reality, all these people are raving dicks. And Bush is no Palpatine. And Cheney was never a good guy. It just doesn't work.
Which is funny because the new Star Wars movies tried to make an analogy for the Bush years in the political situations. The emperor did ascend to power by getting a willing senate to vote away freedom in exchange for a promise of security.
Hmm...
If you make Cheney Palpatine and Bush Vader, it almost works. Bush was never a good guy, but like Vader, he was a childish, easily manipulated, petulant dumbfuck.
But the Star Wars heroes? No one in power is scrupulous enough to qualify even for Han Solo status. Sorry, folks.

bill clinton can't be han solo!! he was before the emperor...so if we are in the new trilogy...maybe chancellor valorum? just an idea...or maybe obi wan...a leader in the old republic who is biding his time to return to fight? but han solo has to be a new figure in this fight...someone without history in the old republic...maybe barack obama could be han solo.

how bout hillary as Mon Mothma?

i'm surprised no one has mentioned that this would also make hillary cheney's daughter.
(and therefore a lesbian? hmm.. maybe there is something to this...)

Best comment thread ever.

Bill=Han
Hillary=Leia
Chelsea Clinton= Chewy

Either way, the Emperor has made a critical error and the time for our attack has come.

Many bloggers died while bringing us this information.

Will you please just go ask Mudede who's who and leave us out of this.

Hillary, undoubtedly, would have to be Belia Darzu.

Hmmm....I can't believe I'm getting into this...but...

Senator Palpatine was masterfully manipulative, intelligent, and well-informed.

Does that *really* sound like President Dubbya Bush? Mr. "I dont have time to read the paper"?

Quite clearly, Bush is Jar-Jar.

@8 - I was operating under the Bill Clinton as Han Solo premise.

Petraus= Admiral Ackbar
Larry Craig= Jar Jar
Iraq = Sarlac Pit
Nickels = Gommorean Gaurd
Obama= Yoda
Republican Congressmen= Rancor

Ok, enough of this nonsense.

The Emperor is Bush Sr.-He created Vader/Bush. Nuff said.

Bush is Vader. He's an evil fuck but in his heart, he means well. However, those good intentions are only meant to help people in a different ideological and economic bracket than the rest of us.

Cheney is Grand Moff Tarkin. He's got Bush /Vader on a short leash, and he's pulling a lot of strings behind the scenes.

Hillary is Princess Leia. Headstrong, a leader, and a bit obnoxious. Plus, I think Leia had a similar health plan for the rebellion. And yes, Bill is totally Han Solo.

Obama is Luke. Young, dashing, inexperienced, idealistic and yet to have his soul shattered by the empire.

Obi-Wan: Al Gore. He's old, occasionally bearded and has been out of the politics/Jedi game for years. Maybe he'll get back in the fight and take one for the team, just like Old Ben.

Dennis Kucinich is Chewie. The lovable, indecipherable sidekick that'll never get a medal for helping blow up the Death Star. Which is total bullshit.

Now lets never speak of this again.

i'm so fucking sick of star wars. people: IT'S NOT EVEN THAT GOOD.

could we use Dune as an analogy instead?

how about this: Osama Bin Laden is Paul Atreides, the Fremen are the Muslim Horde, the Oil Industry is the Spacing Guild...

Hilary is NO princess, she's obviously a wookie!

I would argue that shrub is in fact Tarkin, a leader so inept and clueless that he spends a gazillion galatic credits building a military instillation that can be blown to smithereens by a single photonic torpedo.

Also, he and Peter Cushing, who protrayed Tarkin in the first film, both have that scrawny chicken-neck thing going.

That would make more sense with the Cheny/Vader analogy, IMM.

Additionally, I would suggest that David Lesar, CEO & Chairman of the Board of Halliburton, would fit nicely into the Emperor Palpatine slot.

And Alan Greenspan would of course be Yoda: short, wizzened, hairy ears, given to spewing seemingly obscure, nonsensical utterances that others endlessly parse for the tiny nuggets of whisdom they might contain.

Isn't Obi-Wan Jimmy Carter? At some point, Obi-Wan, Like Carter, pussed out. But, when he comes back years later he's a stone-cold motherfucker and finally sticks it to the Dark Side.

@10 and @21 are the closest.

I like Bush Sr. as the Sith Lord. And Gore as Obi-Wan.

Obama WISHES he was Luke. I think Luke is still in hiding on Tatooine and has yet to reveal himself.

Karl Rove is Boba Fett, the (character) assassin.

Jimmy Carter, the elder statesman and Nobel laureate, is Yoda.

Am I really the only one who sees Hillary as Queen Whatever-the-Hell-her-name-is, the one Natalie Portman played in that awful movie with the Jamaican-accented mutant merchandising opportunity.

Mother of the real Queen. Chelsea's day will come!

...definitely Gore as Obi-Wan.

Geni @ 27,

I think her name was Queen Amigdala or something. And she was democratically elected which begs the question of who the hell elects a 17 queen, and how does one run for "queen" in the first place.

The catfights over the makeup and wardrobe during the primaries must be intense.

BTW if you watch the new Star Wars movies in Spanish on the DVDs, they're really quite good. Especially if you only catch every third word or so.

Norway elected its monarch, and i swear to god, the daughter of this king named her daughter Leia, so Norway has a real Princess Leia

These are all fantastic arguments, but Jonah S is obviously correct.

But we overlooked something here: who's Jar-Jar Binks? This is important people.

jar jar is John Gibson, annoying, stupid and even his "friends" hope he gets run over by a bus

Andrew, I love the Queen Amygdala reference. She's the filter for emotions! That explains her total lack of affect!

@ All the people referencing the newer, shittier trilogy: Let's just ignore it and maybe it'll go away. Saying Jar Jar's name gives him power.

Props to whoever said Boba Fett is Karl Rove.

Ginsberg can't be Yoda. Oprah is Obama's Yoda.

Geni @ 32,

She also may be involved in facial recognition and the fear response.

Score, Queen Amigdala!

@26: you beat me to it. Rove is Fett.

And you guys? It's Queen Amidala. First name Padme, last name Amidala. No 'G' anywhere. I can't believe you made me reference the later trilogy. My head hurts.

@29

(1) Norway's King was not elected. The Norwegian people voted to have a king, then a committee offered the post to him. There wasn't a ballot with three potential kings on it...

(2) Leah Isadora Behn is the daughter of Norway's Princess Martha Louise. Leah is not a member of the royal family, not a princess and not in line for the throne due to Princess Martha Louise's choice of spouse.

Just the facts.