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This is why I refuse to touch Red Bull. Hell, one can is enough to induce hummingbird-ness

I stopped drinking coffee for a couple weeks, and survived the withdrawal syndrome... Then I had a vivid dream about drinking a cup of coffee, so I indulged that morning, and spent the next three hours cracked out of my mind. Never have I been so convinced that if pot is illegal, so should coffee be.

Um, make that caffeine--of any sort.