News My American Cousin
posted by August 2 at 10:33 AM
onI recently learned from a friend who returned from Zimbabwe, that a few clever chaps in Harare (the capitol of Zimbabwe) had not too long ago come up with a trick that could make a long line at a petrol station instantly vanish. They’d drive in a pickup truck to the front of the line and inform the station’s attendants that they were delivering a corpse to a funeral. The attendants would then look at the back of the pickup, see a casket, and permit the driver to proceed to a pump. The casket was, of course, empty.
Because the trick was so effective, everyone started using it. Because the attendants weren’t born yesterday, they became suspicious of the sudden high number of men and women jumping the line with the backing of a casket. To counter the trick, the attendants began demanding visual proof of the corpse—open the casket; no corpse; go to the back of the long, long line. As you can imagine, the next step for the clever was to produce an actual corpse in the casket.
This Zimbabwean corpse in the casket has an American cousin. It’s the dummy used by solo riders in the commuter lane.
Fed up with backups and endless brake lights, some drivers are zipping through the HOV lane with a secret: That person in their passenger seat isn’t actually breathing.Last week Trooper Tony Brock pulled over a Black Diamond man for cruising in the Highway 167 carpool lane with a dolled-up mannequin as his fellow rider.
It wasn’t the first time Brock had seen drivers resorting to creative schemes to bypass rush-hour gridlock.
The dead and dumb are not always useless.
Comments
I know someone who got a massive ticket for this in Boston's carpool lane.
The things people do.
I think it's been clear for a while now that the dead are useful. After all, W rode 3,000 corpses to Iraq and reelection.
congrats charles on a post that 1) makes sense 2) doesn't blatantly go for the race or social card and 3) doesn't include a random picture you found.
I'm reminded of the recent (-ly aired in the US) episode of Doctor Who, where desperate highway travelers kidnap people off the street in order to get HOV privilege.
i'd see if i could get my friend to lie down in the coffin. then it would be really funny for him to shout "boo" when the attendant opened the coffin lid.
Charles, congratulations on the incredibly obscure Abraham Lincoln reference! Which came first, the title or the post?
@ 6: Awesome.
Charles, this was a great post. Thanks for this!
Yay, coherent, funny and interesting post!
ddv, totally agree.
Sstarr, if you think that's incredibly obscure you have an inflated sense of your own knowledge.
As someone who commutes to and from the eastside on a regular basis, I've gotten pretty creative about avoiding traffic and bottlenecks on 520 and I-90. I use surface streets, shortcuts and have been known to purchase a small amount of gas at the station right before the east entrance 520 bridge in order to cut through the on ramp back up. But, anyone who knowingly violates HOV lane etiquette is just low, and deserves a swift kick in the nads along with a hefty ticket. I see it all the time ...
it never ceases to amaze and disgust me (whenever i'm in seattle) to note so many people driving by themselves while commuting to and from work.
Jesus Christ. Learning to ride a motorcycle is hard, but it isn't that hard. All I can think of is that people do this stupid shit because cheating is their kink.
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