Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« More Morning News | Touchy Touchy Record Industry »

Friday, August 10, 2007

MILFing the K-Fed: Terrible Happening the Fifth!

posted by on August 10 at 9:23 AM

Last night somebody reported here that something called a “Kevin Federline” has made a bold and terrifying litigious move to snatch Britney Spears’ children out of her ever-crazier and unfit grasp, on the basis that she’s a coot-flashing, chain-smoking whore who shall surely end up drowning them in the bath tub so’s they can all to go live happy in heaven with the Jesus Man.

But in a shattering newish development, an explosive and mundo pervy love triangle of Jerry Springer proportions seems to have developed between K-Fed, the Britster and the woman whose wretched womb is responsible for unleashing the horror that is Spear’s upon the universe: Britney’s very own mother (yes, and it seems she actually had one)…LYNN!

Sources that often totally make shit up confirm that Britney had a nuclear-style melt down at dear old muther, accusing her quite candidly of sampling her ex’s sausage! “You’re such a filthy backstabbing bitch, that you’re no doubt fucking my ex husband just to bug me!!!” or something is almost exactly like what Britney actually said to her poor mother about the situation. Exactly just how accurate these accusations are is a matter for the courts, Britney’s future team of psychiatrists, the CDC and TMZ to decide, but frankly it doesn’t look good, for there is already a hit song about the sick and alleged affair. Britney’s mother’s mouth is full of K-Fed’s rancid sperm just now, and she is unable to comment at this juncture. Updates after the swallow.

britney-kevin-crack.jpg

RSS icon Comments

1

WOW! most comments EVER! i demand a raise.

Posted by adrian! | August 10, 2007 4:08 PM
2

no comment.

Posted by infrequent | August 10, 2007 4:16 PM

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).