Sex Winning the War on Teenage Sex
posted by July 23 at 8:12 AMon
This weekend the Washington Post reported that a long, steady decline in teen sex—and teen pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections among teens—leveled off in 2001.
After decreasing steadily and significantly for more than a decade, the percentage of teenagers having intercourse began to plateau in 2001 and has failed to budge since then, despite the intensified focus in recent years on encouraging sexual abstinence, according to new analyses of data from a large federal survey…
Experts are unsure of the reasons for the change, but they speculated that it could be the result of a combination of factors, including growing complacency among the young about AIDS and the possibility that some irreducible portion of the teenage population can never be dissuaded from having sex.
We’ve spent a decade and hundreds of millions of dollars trying to talk teenagers out of having sex, and this seemingly irreducible portion of the teenage population shrugs off the abstinence message, stubbornly insisting on their supposed right to sex. These teenagers seem to believe that sex is a choice they can make for themselves and that there’s something “cool” or “hip” about making the government, which only cares about their physical and metaphysical salvation, look foolish and out of touch.
If this new report makes anything clear it should be this: the time for talk is over. The time for taking the gloves off has arrived. It is time to get serious about winning the war on teen sex. If the number of teens having sex won’t be reduced willingly, then it is time to reduce their numbers by force.
It is time to consider the chemical castration of American teenagers.
Some may say that chemical castration is an extreme measure. But premarital sex is always wrong. Remaining sexually abstinent until marriage not only prevents the transmission of diseases and teen pregnancy, it saves souls, and prevents hurricanes. (Say what you will about Sen. David Vitter—the “pro-family, pro-abstinence, anti-gay-marriage senator from Louisiana—at least he waited until after marriage before seeking out hookers to diaper him.)
We’ve spent hundreds of millions of dollars trying to talk teenagers out of having sex while their gonads and hormones shout at them to do just the opposite. Clearly talk isn’t going to win what is, at bottom, a war on teenage hormones. We have to start speaking the language hormones understand. We need to fight hormones with drugs that attack, block, and neutralize hormones.
No more negotiation. No more talk. It’s time to put depo provera and tamoxifen, the two most effective chemical castration drugs, in Doritos and Mountain Dew and lip gloss and Axe body spray.