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Thursday, June 7, 2007

The Liberation of Paris

posted by on June 7 at 8:23 AM

Paris Hilton is a free woman. She got an early release for “medical reasons.”

RSS icon Comments

1

Christ on a crutch. Is that how it works now?

Posted by Ziggity | June 7, 2007 8:28 AM
2

The lesson is, if you get sent to the pokey, cry all the time and don't eat the food and make yourself sick.

I'd like to be sentenced to Paris Hilton's house for 45 days too.

Posted by elswinger | June 7, 2007 8:29 AM
3

Next up: she'll be able to leave the house for partying, um, networking, because...that's what she does for a living. She parties. And gets fucked. By guy's who can't finish. Because she is so fucking ugly.

As we all know, she also refuses to swallow. She's not even good at getting it all over her titties. She's worthless.

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 7, 2007 8:35 AM
4

Here's a graphic to go with your headline, if you need it.

http://www.umkc.edu/lib/spec-col/ww2/Dday/images/98-2517.gif

Posted by elswinger | June 7, 2007 8:37 AM
5

Medical problem? Did she break her teeth on the prison bars?

Posted by oljb | June 7, 2007 8:39 AM
6

Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that what the infirmary is for?

THIS IS SUCH BULLSHIT

Posted by Griff | June 7, 2007 8:40 AM
7

Wow...that is pretty unbelievable. The sheriff, or whoever it is that runs the jail is going to get a lot of shit for this decision.

Posted by Brad | June 7, 2007 8:47 AM
8

It says on MSNBC that she's back to her 45 day sentence- with the time served, she'll serve 40 days of house arrest.

Correct me if I'm wrong- she was at the MTV Movie awards on Sunday, and even including the 2 hours she served today, I can't figure out how that adds up to 5 days...

Posted by Griff | June 7, 2007 8:54 AM
9

this is the greatest injustice in recorded history! i demand that bush be impeached!

Posted by maxsolomon | June 7, 2007 8:57 AM
10

Like Martha Stewart, the only reason she was put in jail at all is because she is a rich and famous woman, and if there's one thing the average American male can't handle, it's a rich and famous woman.

Posted by Sean | June 7, 2007 9:02 AM
11

Damn Sean, you caught me-

I couldn't possibly be pissed that minorities and lowerclass citizens are treated like shit in a penal system, while spoiled rich kids are above the law.

I couldn't POSSIBLY be pissed that this will send a clear message to the tweens of America that no matter how neglegent your actions, as long as your rich our corrupt system will cater to your every whim.

Nope, it's all because I hates me some uppity lady folk who can't stay in the kitchen, and make babies.

Posted by Griff | June 7, 2007 9:09 AM
12

Actually, Sean, I can't handle drunks with no sense of accountability getting into a car and plowing into a sidewalk cafe or a playground. But, hey, it's probably really a deep-seated misogynistic fear and an imposition of my phallus on social power structures.

Posted by Ziggity | June 7, 2007 9:10 AM
13

Ah gee, and here all this time I thought she was sent to the pokey (I know there's a pun in there somewhere) for violating the terms of her parole after getting busted on a DUI.

Griff@8:

Apparently, if you show up at 11:00 p.m. you get credit for a full day's incarceration. Same applies if you check out at 2:00 a.m. Can you say, "travesty of justice"? I'm not certain Paris can - it might strain her vocabulary.

And anyone want to take bets she's still going to try to spin the "this trying experience taught me so much about myself" B.S. she was spewing pre-sentencing?

Posted by COMTE | June 7, 2007 9:13 AM
14

Silver lining, people! She was going to serve a 23 (?) day stint in jail. Now, she won't be hitting the party circuit for over a month. Yes, she's out of jail. And that's bullshit. But with the outcry that this is getting, my bet is she really won't be seen in public for the full 40 days. Ultimately, less Paris.

Posted by Kate | June 7, 2007 9:15 AM
15

Paris Hilton = vapid whore
Sean = asshat
Griff = correct
Ziggity = correct
Mr. Poe = funny

Posted by monkey | June 7, 2007 9:16 AM
16

folks, calm down. she'll be going back, especially now that she thinks she can get away with her flagrant disregard of the law.

I am surprised that she wasn't confined to a medical or psychiatric facility. Generally, one would think if the medical issues were so bad, she'd need to get some serious treatment.


Posted by r | June 7, 2007 9:24 AM
17

Sean: Agreed -- I can't believe how many people don't see this and are so hostile towards Paris Hilton. There are MANY other (male) celebrities who did everything Paris did and much worse and have never done a day of jail time (Daniel Baldwin, a million rappers, etc).

Posted by jamier | June 7, 2007 9:24 AM
18

Ahh...equal protection under the law, but some protection is more equal than others.

Posted by paralogist | June 7, 2007 9:27 AM
19

Wait, so you're saying that because male stars get away with it, Paris should be exempt?

As the old saying goes: "Two wrongs don't make a right"

I think you need a refresher course in the first grade.

Posted by Griff | June 7, 2007 9:28 AM
20

According to accounts published just yesterday, she was spending her time in jail reflecting on how to change peoples opinion of her. What part of spoiled little bitch isn't covered by someone getting out of prison after serving less than 1/5 of an already shamefully light sentence because she doesn't feel good. Damn.

Posted by HolyCrap | June 7, 2007 9:37 AM
21

Hey all you haters, quit it with your hate-speech.

#3, that was horrible.

Posted by Don't hate me because I'm beautiful | June 7, 2007 9:48 AM
22

well there goes that book. it can't be that exciting with only 3 days in jail. anyway, this all makes me think of oz.

Posted by um | June 7, 2007 10:02 AM
23

well there goes that book. it can't be that exciting with only 3 days in jail. anyway, this all makes me think of oz.

Posted by um | June 7, 2007 10:02 AM
24

Her medical problem was that she was cold and only had three blankets and had to use one of them as a pillow.

For some reason I'm thinking of the Princess and the Pea.

Posted by Fnarf | June 7, 2007 10:07 AM
25

Maybe she had to leave a cell open for Lindsay Lohan once she leaves rehab...

I'm disgusted that the LA Sheriff's department basically mishandled childish manipulation a la "I can't eat that..."

Posted by Laurie D. T. Mann | June 7, 2007 10:19 AM
26

Now I have to find something else to be interested in. I am outraged!

Posted by ljg | June 7, 2007 10:27 AM
27

Please don't compare Paris to Martha Stewart. Martha was prosecuted for a crime that the feds couldn't prove. So, they tacked on a crime that she was definitely guilty of -- lying to investigators. By the way, how is that a crime? She wasn't under oath for fuck's sake.

Paris is a fuckwit who thinks she's entitled to put other people's lives on the line by driving drunk. Oh, and she's entitled not to have to pay any penalty for it.

Posted by keshmeshi | June 7, 2007 10:31 AM
28

Damn! I was getting so used to not hearing about PH. Three whole days. Sweet! I'll remember them well.

Posted by bauhaus | June 7, 2007 10:35 AM
29

Poor old, rich old Martha Stewart's arrest and trial were completely strategic. If you recall, those events took Enron right off the front page.

Posted by Bauhaus | June 7, 2007 10:39 AM
30

maybe she needed her oc's. (oxycontins).
She was bothered by the "jail noise" and the bright lights. Nothing a little oxy can't take care of.

Posted by duncan | June 7, 2007 10:43 AM
31

i'm usually non violent and i mostly don't raelly care..but honestly, what with all the other bullshit that goes on in this world, THIS bullshit makes me want to listen to public enemy all day and go outside and slap somebody

Posted by reverend dr dj riz | June 7, 2007 10:50 AM
32

It's official.

There is no Rule of Law.

Just one law to hold down the middle class and the poor, and a get out of jail free card for the rich.

Sad sad day for America.

Posted by Will in Seattle | June 7, 2007 10:51 AM
33

I know what news story is going to take up 40% of Scarborough Country tonight.

Posted by elswinger | June 7, 2007 11:02 AM
34

Well, alcoholism is a medical condition, so are eating disorders, veneral diseases. I guess when you are rich enough to have a Harvard doctor and Harvard lawyer, both on retainer I would assume, then anything is possible.

Posted by phenics | June 7, 2007 11:11 AM
35

From the article: "She served a total of five days -- the normal stay for a violation of this kind."

Just like Martha Stewart, the court gave her an unusually large sentence - 45 days or 9 times the normal sentence in this case - because of her wealth and fame.

If any of you hypocrites actually cared about class-blind justice, you'd acknowledge the discrimination against both of these women. As it turns out, your bitching stems from envy and prejudice rather than principle.

Posted by Sean | June 7, 2007 11:19 AM
36

monkey @15:
Only asshats still use the term "asshat".

Posted by Sean | June 7, 2007 11:26 AM
37

I think we all know who Sean really is.

Nice try, Paris. Your days of slogging under the pseudonym of 'SEAN' are OVER!

Bitch!

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 7, 2007 11:26 AM
38

If this was her first offense on a DUI, she could have got up to six months. All she originally got was a slap on the wrist and a suspended license. She was convicted of driving recklessly and with a suspended license.

It is true that if she were just an ordinary rich person,rather than a celebrutante, she probably would have got off, but if she were poor and couldn't afford a lawyer, she would have done the max and been put in general population.

I think the original 45 days was fare considering how many stupid teenage girls look up to her.

Posted by elswinger | June 7, 2007 11:41 AM
39

really, someone should murder her...the one thing that she has in common with the rest of humanity is that she can be killed.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 7, 2007 11:53 AM
40

According to what I saw here and elsewhere, on entrance, Ms. Hilton was 5'8" and weighed 115 lbs. If she refused to eat for 5 days, they were probably afraid she'd seize or go into cardiac arrest in the jail.

Or maybe the media bribed the sheriff to release her, so they'd have something to print that didn't require them to, like, you know, work for a living and find news or something tawdry like that.

I just remember what happened to a woman of my acquaintance a couple years ago. She lost her job, spent 30 days in jail, had her license suspended, and basically got the shaft for doing far less than Ms. Hilton - she was apprehended driving slightly over the legal DUI limit. This was a first offense, and she wasn't already driving on a suspended license or otherwise completely flouting the law. She served the 30 days, too, even though she had young kids at home. The law is applied a trifle differently to those whose grandfathers aren't worth over a billion dollars.

Posted by Geni | June 7, 2007 11:57 AM
41

Gotta get some things straight: FAIR is when things are on a level playing field; FARE is what you pay the cab driver.

Claiming that justice in this country has an inability to be "class-blind" is pure bullshit. I've known public defenders who were twice the attorney those Harvard-educated idiots representing PH are. Girlfriend just had shitty representation which was unfortunately influenced by the media spotlight.

Paris Hilton violated her probation. (Parole is what you get when they release you from prison, probation is what small-timers get after a DUI.) The fact that she got any time at all in county lock-up was nothing more than a way for the judge to teach her a lesson about perjury & recidivism.

Even though she is a skank - I'd love to slap the asshole who coined the word "celebutante" - she was not treated any more or less fairly than any other offender. We just had to watch a whole fuckload more about the entirely ridiculous mess than was necessary. Her attorneys actually did a real shit job. Mine would've gotten her the 5 days on EHM - she'd be back out on the boulevard partying already.

I would like to give her the benefit of the doubt and think that she will never drive drunk or without a valid license ever again, and that's the lesson I believe the court was trying to teach her.

Posted by ChillyMama | June 7, 2007 12:44 PM
42

Putting her in her place
(a poem by commenters on Slog)

"She parties. And gets fucked"
"she is so fucking ugly"
"she also refuses to swallow"
"vapid whore"
"spoiled little bitch"
"fuckwit"
"She's worthless"
"she can be killed"
"someone should murder her"

Posted by Sean | June 7, 2007 12:58 PM
43
Wait, so you're saying that because male stars get away with it, Paris should be exempt?

As the old saying goes: "Two wrongs don't make a right"

I think you need a refresher course in the first grade.

Yes. There are plenty of wrongs with the justice system -- DUI penalties are too lenient, drug penalties are too harsh causing the jails to fill, black people get much more harsh sentences and hire conviction rates, rich people can hire more competent lawyers and can avoid conviction, etc.

The fact is that if Paris Hilton was a white man or an anonymous white woman, she almost certainly would not have been sentenced to 45 days in jail.

Paris Hilton wasn't sentenced for driving with a suspended license, she was sentenced for being a public slut.

Posted by jamier | June 7, 2007 1:56 PM
44

"She parties. And gets fucked"
"she is so fucking ugly"
"she also refuses to swallow"
"vapid whore"
"spoiled little bitch"
"fuckwit"
"She's worthless"
"she can be killed"
"someone should murder her"

A-fuckin'-men! Preach it!

Posted by Not Mr. Poe, but probably Mr. Poe | June 7, 2007 2:00 PM
45

"She parties. And gets fucked"
"she is so fucking ugly"
"she also refuses to swallow"
"vapid whore"
"spoiled little bitch"
"fuckwit"
"She's worthless"
"she can be killed"
"someone should murder her"

A-fuckin'-men! Preach it!

Posted by Not Mr. Poe, but probably Mr. Poe | June 7, 2007 2:01 PM
46

Thanks for speaking up, Sean. I'm no fan of Paris, either, but what the fuck is with attacking her sexuality and calling her a "bitch"? We can criticize the criminal justice system without resorting to sexist fucking language.

Posted by Jill | June 7, 2007 3:45 PM
47

Watch for the new reality show. Paris locked in her house. Live for 40 days... You know MTV...
I'm sure it would be watched more than Big Brother. Hell I'll bet they already have a deal to release a DVD..

Posted by newave | June 7, 2007 11:34 PM
48

Well I for one am soooooooooo very happy to have her 'beauty and excitement' back out on the street for my enjoyment. Now if only she can stay out of the driver's seat and not kill someone's kid when she is out providing her services.

Posted by ladylulu | June 8, 2007 1:35 AM
49

MSN I NIIPET
MSN

Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 2:07 PM
50

MSN I NIIPET
MSN

Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 2:07 PM
51

MSN I NIIPET
MSN

Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 2:07 PM

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