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Thursday, June 7, 2007

Sharkwater: The Gospel

posted by on June 7 at 17:41 PM

The man who made the movie Sharkwater is first seen sitting on the bottom of the ocean, hugging a shark. The shark stays in the hug at least five seconds before it swims off.

Later, the man is on the roof of a building, discovering another rooftop full of hundreds of shark fins drying in the sun, in what is a major South American mafia trade. The bad guys scramble to take the fins out of sight and then they give chase. The shark-hugger runs.

There is another chase, too, a boat chase. The shark-hugger joins forces with a badass environmental vigilante who citizen-arrests shark poachers at sea. When the poachers get citizen-arrested by the shark-hugger and the vigilante-boater, the government whose laws they are violating protects them and arrest the shark-hugger and the vigilante-boater instead. A legal chase ensues.

Here’s what the poachers do: They catch the sharks. They pull them aboard. They chop off all their fins. They dump the stubby bloody sharks back into the water, where the sharks sink to the ocean floor and bleed to death.

Sharkwater says that 90 percent of the world’s sharks have been killed in recent years so that class-conscious people can eat fancy sharkfin soup sold to them through powerful organized criminals, and so that superstitious people can eat the ground-down powder of sharkfins although it has not been proven to have any health benefits.

Watch this movie. Start with the trailer above, and then here’s the making-of on YouTube (which includes the hug scene).

Sharkwater plays at SIFF Cinema, down in the bowels of McCaw Opera Hall, tomorrow (Friday June 8) at 7 pm and Sunday (June 10) at 7 pm.

RSS icon Comments


While he "hugs" the shark, the shark's ablility to breathe is restricted. Shark gills are only functional when water passes over them, which is why sharks are almost always moving through the water. When they are held still, they have to pump water over their gills to breathe, but many sharks have a diminished ability to do so.

Hug trees, not sharks. Jackass.

Posted by Chris | June 7, 2007 6:07 PM

Jesus fucking christ spraypainted on the hood of a goddamn Prius, has anyone ever missed the point more?

Have you seen the movie? No? Then your idiocy can be forgiven. No, wait, it can't. I've seen it, and I can tell you this:

1) The guy loves sharks. The guy worships sharks. The guy made this movie to PROTECT sharks. (Which is certainly more than you're doing by bitching about supposed shark suffering on a blog.) The guy knows more about sharks than you and I combined. I'm sure he's not "suffocating" the shark intentionally.

2) The sharks he interacts with are, almost exclusively, bigger and stronger than he is. I guarantee that no shark in this movie allows itself to be held or hugged any more than it goddamn well cares to. But then you'd know that if you'd bothered to watch the movie before calling it out as morally or environmentally or sharkishly objectionable.

3) You're going to complain about a guy loosely hugging a shark in a movie in which people HACK OFF SHARKS' LIMBS AND LEAVE THEM TO BLEED TO DEATH?! Seriously? Are you really going to do that?

Forest & trees, my friend, forest & trees.

Posted by Superfurry Animal | June 7, 2007 6:50 PM

Is anyone else kinda glad there are 90% less sharks in the world's oceans? I'm deathly afraid of open water, and though I think the source is something more akin to existential dread (not being able to see what's beneath me), or some nebulous idea of a sea monster, sharks definitely contribute to the reality/legitmacy of this fear.

Posted by md | June 8, 2007 6:07 AM

-- i agree with #2, those sea critters could do anything they wanted... if they choose to pause for a hug at the risk of "holding their breath" (or water), they will and it seems that they do. the guy knows what he's doing and i back his efforts to save these big fish.

Posted by Aaro)))n Edge | June 8, 2007 10:28 AM

@2: I'm just pointing out the seeming ignorance of the pose, if only in keeping with the Slog's snarky tone. Someone who worships sharks should know how they breathe, and should have the respect to leave them be. A "hug" is a human social construct, not a universal sign of love. I dig sharks, and I'm sure it's a great film, but I don't need to dry hump them to show my affection for them.

Posted by Chris | June 8, 2007 12:13 PM


Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 2:38 PM


Posted by Bill | June 12, 2007 2:38 PM

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