Religion “Month of Sundays”—Now with Scientology!
posted by June 19 at 14:37 PMon
We neglected to include the Church of Scientology in our “Month of Sundays” feature package. Since we don’t want anyone—least of all the lawsuit-happy Church of Scientology—to get impression that L. Ron’s cult isn’t a “real” religion, we accepted a reader’s kind offer to attend a Church of Scientology service and write it up for us.
32. Church of Scientology
601 Aurora Avenue N.
Seattle, WA 98109
I blow past the little “reception” desk, hoping to look like I know where I’m going. Quickly busted, I’m soon on a guided tour of the place.
The church is small and better suited for a family dentist office. There’s the small reception area/bookstore. There’s a hallway with large glossy posters of the Church of Scientology’s new building, currently under renovation. The young woman showing me around tells me they’re very excited about the new digs and I can see why. It’s beautiful and it’s huge. A monumental step up from this place.
Before I know it, she’s led me into a small room with only a desk and an extra chair for a one-on-one conversation. Shit. I imagine that this is where everything is going to unravel. Either she’ll smell a rat and send me packing, or I’ll go home with the entire L. Ron Hubbard library. Neither occurs. She just wants to know a little more about me and if I have any questions. I ask if this is Mr. Hubbard here, pointing to a large, black and white photo above her desk. It is. Mr. Hubbard smiles at me intelligently, like he’s trying to figure me out. Thankfully, I’m saved from further questions because it’s time for Sunday Service.
The service room is extremely small, so any anonymity I’d hoped for is gone. As I enter the room I find myself repeating my lies to the minister, a young, handsome man with a fashionable mint green neck tie. He welcomes me and I take my seat.
The service itself basically consists of us reading aloud The Creed of the Church of Scientology and the Prayer for Total Freedom. I find both to be almost totally logical, even agreeable. At their core, both speak of recognizing and protecting basic human rights and liberties. A young man a few seats away nods and says “Awesome.”
The minister thanks us for coming and I’m left with two impressions: First, that it’s a shame about all the wacky aspects of Scientology (the origin of humans on Earth for one thing), because if it were a religion based solely on the simple fundamentals I’ve heard in this little Sunday session, I might actually be able to get behind it—and second, that if I were an actual believer, I’d feel pretty ripped off by such a short, elementary service. JACK HOLLENBACH