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Dan, we get it. Having the "right" gender balance in your relationship does not make you good parents. Now will you please stop with the dead babies?

I'm not cheering for gay rights when I read this, I'm feeling sad for stupid parents, parents with stupid partners, and children of abusers.

Posted by bitch on heels | June 19, 2007 1:02 PM

Yes, I think we've sufficiently proven that there are criminal parents out there, despite their being a man and a woman.

It's probably also true that adoptive parents have less of these stories than biological parents, simply because they are not only planned, but extraordinary efforts have been made through the adoption process.

If only people knew how babies were made and used birth control. Many adults still don't understand this concept.

Posted by Yes | June 19, 2007 1:16 PM

Keep 'em coming, Dan.

These posts will obviously come to an appropriate end when we are allowed to marry.

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 19, 2007 1:24 PM

@1 and 2, these are important because those opposed to gay rights whine all the time that gay parenting is child abuse, while ignoring the actually child abuse at the hands of the much praised mommy and daddy.

Posted by Blaire | June 19, 2007 1:25 PM

@1&2: Don't you realize that for every comment against Dan posting these, there will be at least 1 telling him to keep doing it? Give it up already, he'll post what the hell he wants. Make your own blog for fuckssake.

Plus, everytime I read a story like this I wonder "Is Dan reading this story, and then seething with rage at his social injustice?"

Cause I am not denied any rights (except maybe the right to equal pay...), and it makes my blood boil that someone like Dan can't have equality. The fact that *if* I wanted kids they would be protected and yet there are people who already have them and they are treated so poorly due to some horrible "standard" of families sickens me.

These posts just point out how flawed that "standard" is; because it is cruel and stupid to keep people (and their kids) as second class citizens, just like the people who kill their kids are stupid and cruel.

Posted by Original Monique | June 19, 2007 1:38 PM

while ignoring the actual child abuse? in all fairness, i don't think anyone is ignoring actual child abuse.

i think these posts are sensationalistic and use reasoning that i wouldn't recommend. that said, i understand perfectly why dan is posting them.

Posted by infrequent | June 19, 2007 1:52 PM

I just want to know, Dan. When does "Every Child Deserves a Mother and a Father: Tales of Heroic Parenting from America's Heartland" hit the bookstores?

Posted by Grumpypants | June 19, 2007 1:56 PM

Soon, Grumpypants, soon...

Posted by Dan Savage | June 19, 2007 2:01 PM

! & 2--they makes him happy, let the guy have his fun...

Posted by Boomer in NYC | June 19, 2007 2:03 PM

and support him!!! (i should have added)

Posted by infrequent | June 19, 2007 2:04 PM

@ Monique

I have just as much right to this forum as you do. If I want my own blog, I'll get one, for fuckssake, thanks for your advice. For now I'll just post here. And I know Dan will do what he wants.

Further, as someone who IS subject to both your lack of rights to equal pay and Dan's lack of rights to marry, my opinion stands unmoved by your outrage.

Dead children are just sad. I don't care who's parenting them. Would you want a religious right org to hunt down and post a bunch of cases of gay child abuse? There's a smug joke implied here that I don't like at all, and it's at the expense of abused children. I don't care who their parents are.

Posted by bitch on heels | June 19, 2007 2:18 PM

I get it. I guess that I agree with Dan's point and now I'm getting a little antsy with him making the point over and over and over again. I forget that some people need to hear it again and again to get it.

Posted by #2 | June 19, 2007 2:28 PM

I'm with #11. This is boring and pointless, not to mention a bit of a joke at the expense of the poor kids. And it is especially boring and pointles ON THIS BLOG, where you are preaching to the pro-gay marriage choir.

If you think this point is worth making, Dan, then pussy the fuck up and write a fucking editorial for the Seattle Times, or the Seattle PI, or even - gasp - a paper or magazine with national reach, like the New York Times or Washington Post or Newsweek or Time or fucking wherever.

But here? Boring. Predictable. Not clever. And making the same point over and over to an audience who is already with you.

Posted by I'm with #11 | June 19, 2007 2:44 PM

I dunno, I kinda like reading about dead babies. Or, more accurately, the stupid fucktards that accidentally kill their babies. I like it for the same reason I like Dan's advice column: so I can laugh at the fucktards (or kinky freeks, at the case may be) and feel better about myself. What's the problem?

Posted by A. Nony Mouse | June 19, 2007 3:13 PM

@11: Its sad that kids die in horrible ways, but it happens everyday all the time. I don't see how it's a joke when dan posts it and I don't think its at the dead childs expense. It's taking stories that are reported, and pointing out a hypocrisy that exists in our culture. That is not a joke, and its not abusing the dead child further.

Just like if people wanted to point out the hypocrisy of cultures that make women by making them wear lots of clothes to 'keep men from objectifying them', but then beat/rape/and subjegate them. Like "Every woman needs to wear a burka..."

And I may not wear a burka, but I do have outrage about those that are forced to wear it (or anything similar). And, not that you need it, I am sorry you don't have equal rights.

Posted by Original Monique | June 19, 2007 3:34 PM

If I knew that the same woman who killed her kid in Lake Stevens also said something negative about gay parenting the day before the little boy died, I might see your burka point. But as far as I know, she was just a dumb kid, not a dumb homophobic kid.

The joke goes like this: "And they say I'm a bad parent... I'll show you some bad parenting." Then #14 laughs at the fucktards, and the baby is still dead. Boy is that funny. I feel so much closer to equality now. Someone get me a civil union.

Posted by bitch on heels | June 19, 2007 3:56 PM

Raising awareness is important. Whether you agree with Dan's reasons for posting or not he makes visible tradgedies that would otherwise go unacknowledged.

Personally, I'm all for pointing out that good parenting isn't related to sexual preference.

Posted by clarity | June 19, 2007 4:42 PM

Just last week I read about Michael Savage calling gay parenting child abuse. I read about it here on Slog. This is the link:

When people like Michael Savage stop saying things like this then Dan will probably stop putting up posts like this. I hope the people yelling at Dan about this post are also sending angry notes to Michael Savage.

Posted by Gay Parent | June 19, 2007 4:49 PM

Is this infant's relatively brief period of suffering, which it was not even capable of understanding, really worse than allowing it to be raised to adulthood by this abusive moron? A minute or so, versus a lifetime, perpetuated no doubt through further generations every 20 years to infinity?

Posted by Fnarf | June 19, 2007 4:53 PM

It was fascinating (and totally sad) to read this story after witnessing a young mother doing the SAME THING with her infant at the local planned parenthood where i am employed. When our clinician told the lady that taping a pacifier in her child's mouth was very dangerous, and also likely to have harmful effects on his speech development among other things, she shrugged and said "I've been doing this since he was two months old, he's fine." She unfortunately visited our clinic too late.....let's hope she took the fucking birth control we gave her!
And back to the thread, I say keep posting Dan. I'm so fucking sick of hearing people's moral outrage about gay parents, abortion, gay marriage, birth control, etc etc. Where's the moral outrage over the stupid, lazy and completely inept cunt of a mother who tapes a pacifier in her child's mouth because she's too preoccupied to actually care for the child she probably didn't plan to have in the first place?

Posted by beks | June 19, 2007 5:14 PM

Raising awareness? Like Fox News raises awareness, maybe.

Good parenting? There's not a shread of good parenting mentioned, only bad. And let's apply some logic here: just because some straight people are bad parents does not mean that all gay people are good parents. (And this statement does not in any way imply -- more logic -- that some or all gay people are bad parents.)

Like I said at the beginning, we get it. Some people who have male/female parenting situations practice real child abuse.

The only thing potentially more masturbatory than telling Dan Savage what to post would be telling Michael Savage what to say on his radio show. But I'll call in and see how far I get. Maybe Dan would get further. (He could pretend to be a relative.) Have you advised him to address his commentary in that direction?

Posted by bitch on heels | June 19, 2007 7:53 PM

I agree with bitch on heels. I think she needs to come have happy hour with me. ;)

Posted by Shirley | June 20, 2007 11:05 AM

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