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Friday, June 22, 2007

3 Weeks in Geek

posted by on June 22 at 13:32 PM

portman.jpg

Welcome back to the Week in Geek. Apologies for the hiatus, but geeks are busy and don’t always get around to writing these dumb posts each week. Also, there was that whole Freaky Friday thing, and some kind of drinking conference in Portland.

Anyway, enough excuses. The past three weeks have been chock full of all kinds of geek news, so let’s get started.

Apple posts iPhone Guided Tour videos, e-mails with “Dooooooood” as subject line increase by 900%.

AT&T adds 2000 temporary store staff to handle the expected crush of people with $600 burning a hole in their pockets.

AT&T says rate plans will be announced before 6/29, assuring we’ll know how much to get on that payday loan next Thursday.

Should IT departments be wary of iPhones on their networks? Huh? This guy thinks so.

Apple announced last week that anyone can develop applications for the iPhone, as long as those applications aren’t, you know, applications. In response, Mac application developers freaked right the fuck out.

iPhone to sport a glass screen instead of original plastic, making it more scratch-resistant and less shatter-resistant.

iPhone now polling 4th in 2008 Democratic presidential nomination.

iPhone expected to lead a revolution in touchy-touchy tech toys, ultimately leading to even more revolutionary devices like big ass tables.

New Apple phone also promises to revolutionize personal transportation and home entertainment.

AT&T and Apple stores have modified their hours for iPhone Day (formerly known as June 29th). Fuck yeah! Modified hours!

Man spots iPhone on a California train, snaps photo with his inferior piece of shit “cell phone.”

Apple announces iPhone battery life to be better than expected, stock goes up $4.

Wine Director at “prominent restaurant” describes first-hand iPhone experience. His restrained conclusion? “The Apple iPhone is a magical device that for the first time seemlessly blends art, architecture and electronics…,” and then something about Natalie Portman.

And that’s the news. Busy couple of weeks, no?

Watch this space next week for news from the front lines. Though really, I don’t see what all the fuss is about. It looks like a pretty ordinary phone to me.

iphone.jpg

RSS icon Comments

1

Duuuuude.

But seriously, no mention of the iPhone?

Posted by nootch | June 22, 2007 1:38 PM
2

I do have a guilty pleasure for big ass tables.

Posted by luddite | June 22, 2007 1:41 PM
3

Explain to me again why I should buy a gizmo that does what other gizmos have done for five years now, but costs twice as much? Because it's pretty?

I love that they pulled their ads and replaced it with new ones featuring a model with much larger hands. Perspective! http://l-rs.org/archief/003192.html via Boing Boing. Oh, and they're so full of DRM it's oozing out the portholes.

Posted by Fnarf | June 22, 2007 1:49 PM
4

I would expect that the monthly bill will exceed $100 based on my experience of owning a Blackberry. Using it just as a phone cost $50 a month and adding data capability (email, net) was another $50 a month.

Posted by elswinger | June 22, 2007 1:52 PM
5

the i phone is overrated and wont do anythign my ppc6700 does already.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 22, 2007 1:54 PM
6

I am looking forward to owning an iPhone.

Mind you, I'll be buying it for $100 at the same time that I get a new 50 inch HDTV for $300 in 2009, unlike the other suckers ... and using the optional cheaper new service for cell calls that will exist then.

Posted by Will in Seattle | June 22, 2007 1:57 PM
7

Ahhh, you know that pic is not the iPhone from Apple right?

Posted by Just Me | June 22, 2007 2:13 PM
8

Personally, I'll be waiting for this: http://www.openmoko.com

Posted by Angela | June 22, 2007 2:19 PM
9

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Posted by Mr. Poe | June 22, 2007 2:23 PM
10

Bellevue Ave: Except not be lame. :(

Posted by jamier | June 22, 2007 2:32 PM
11

Come on Fnarf. There are many issues with the iPhone - it's certainly the most over-hyped product in recent memory - but you can't seriously argue that there's nothing new about it. The basic features exist in some form on other devices, sure, but the interface is completely new, it has a real web browser (mobile IE is not a real browser. Nor, for that matter is non-mobile IE), visual voicemail, it's got that whole turny-flippy thing, etc. It's not that it does anything that hasn't been done before, it's that it does all of them better, or at least that's the promise/hope/propaganda.

And yeah, it's awfully damn pretty. Since when is that not a desirable feature? Design is important.

So yeah, you can do these things in some form on some other phones (how many can do all of them, though?), and you can mount plenty of (generally speculative) criticisms about the iPhone, but "it's nothing new" ain't one of them.

Posted by Anthony Hecht | June 22, 2007 2:32 PM
12

So, when will PC Geeks get their own Slog column?

Posted by COMTE | June 22, 2007 2:36 PM
13

i am so tired of all this iphone hysteria

Posted by investigatory journalist | June 22, 2007 2:41 PM
14

Hey, I linked to that Surface thing.. Isn't that enough?

Posted by Anthony Hecht | June 22, 2007 2:41 PM
15

The iPhone will fucking rule. I will take great care of it for a week. Then I will drop it once. Then it goes downhill. Whatevs. Itz ma phone, makin ma calls .

Posted by Mr. Poe | June 22, 2007 2:44 PM
16

$600 for 2 year old technology and a 2 year contract is a pretty bad deal, IMO.

Posted by Tiffany | June 22, 2007 2:49 PM
17

10: the ppc6700 isnt lame because for people who buy a pda for utilitarian purposes it fulfills all you could need. I suspect the iphone is pda-lite for kids and hipsters who buy things to impress one another.

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 22, 2007 2:53 PM
18

Well, a "turny flippy thing", that's worth $600 right there. But wouldn't you be just as satisfied with ten cents worth of sparkly plastic jewels?

Did you miss the Google Maps announcement that they're available on PPCs and one model of Blackberry now, with full GPS? Does the iPhone have GPS? I mean, sure, that's not as cool as a turny flippy thing, but still.

I'm not sure what "not a real browser" is supposed to mean; I'm a Firefox bigot myself, but I use IE all the time as well, for applications that require it. It's not my fave, but it, you know, works.

I'm just not seeing it. Now piss off with your tech talk and let me get back to my 78s and my windup Victrola!

Posted by Fnarf | June 22, 2007 2:56 PM
19

Sure sure, I'm not saying it's worth $600, or even $200, I'm just saying it does sport some new ideas and features.

Not a real browser means that IE is a nightmare. It "works" in the sense that it can display some web pages, but it displays many of them incorrectly, and probably has cost me something like a bazillion of the most irritating hours of development to work around it's innumerable bugs and it's insistence on ignoring perfectly reasonable standards. That browser has held back progress in web development by years. Fuck IE. It's the George Bush of software.

Posted by Anthony Hecht | June 22, 2007 3:07 PM
20

As a true geek apple shit just piss's me off.

Posted by CodyBolt | June 22, 2007 3:09 PM
21

safari is a true browser? oh rly!

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 22, 2007 3:13 PM
22

I already spend a hundred bucks a month so that I can watch The Sopranos (oops - I guess I'll have to start staying awake through Big Love with the gf), I can learn about the planets and lazy-ass pandas on Discovery, and I get to watch B-52's drop the same bombs on the same places over and over again - hello? Do a show on this, for cripes sake: http://www.vectorsite.net/avcmast_1.jpg Those leather bi-plane helmets from WWI: Dapper. I once saw the dieting people on the cruise on the reality tv show on FitTV get a surprise basketball game sprung on them as a challenge. Gold! Jumping in the air a little every single time they bounced the ball. Not necessarily skillful, but synchronization of any sort is meritorious. I'm off topic, but it's kinda like I'm calling you up and telling you. That's my 100 bucks worth.

I got a phone, man. Just doesn't send pictures. Or receive them. The plan. Not the phone. Phone's nice.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | June 22, 2007 3:20 PM
23

Lets just agree to use Lynix

AMIRITE?!!11

Posted by CodyBolt | June 22, 2007 3:20 PM
24

Lynx, CodyBolt, not Lynix.

Posted by Tiffany | June 22, 2007 3:28 PM
25

Oh is that what you're calling it -- "development to work around its innumberable bugs". C'mon, we all know you're just looking at porn. "Something about the way it's displaying this embedded video isn't quite right -- more research!"

Yeah, IE is a pain in the ass. All software is a pain in the ass. Microsoft does some things really, really well, and some things it deliberately puts huge amounts of effort into making as stupid and fucked-up as possible. So does Apple. So does Adobe (nobody, NOBODY is as bad as Adobe). So does everybody. You get used to it. It's just a computer. I can read the Slog in anything, and that's all that matters, right?

Posted by Fnarf | June 22, 2007 3:30 PM
26

I'm not a huge fan of this touchy-touchy trend in technology. I don't like smudges all over my stuff. If you touch my apple monitor I will cut off your hand. And the iPhone doesn't look all that crazy-cool. I don't understand the hype.

Posted by Carollani | June 22, 2007 3:34 PM
27

Lynx? Jesus. Bring back Gopher while you're at it. Archie? Veronica? Anyone with me? Pre-web? Hot stuff. Dunno why it never caught on.

Posted by Fnarf | June 22, 2007 3:35 PM
28

after going to the apple site to see it's tour

1. I cant watch the tour because of apples quicktime crap.

2. going to another site I see that the iphone has no text entry method beyond the touch pad itself. i can't wait to try that out...hahahaha

Posted by Bellevue Ave | June 22, 2007 3:47 PM
29

I'm with you Fnarf. Loved me some Gopher.

Yeah, all (most) software sucks in some way, but IE sucks BALLS in nearly every way, and it's practically deliberate. I heard they actually disbanded the IE development team for a couple of years, because, you know, they ruled the market and there were no advancements to be made in browser technology. IE 7 is far better than 6, but still sorely lacking.

Microsoft does do some things well - Xbox.

Posted by Anthony Hecht | June 22, 2007 3:50 PM
30

Sorry fnarf, I'm too busy trying to dial-up a bbs on my 1600 bps external modem to comment.

A N N SSS I
A A NN N S S I
A A N N N S I
AAAAAAA N N N SSSS I
A A N N N S I
A A N N N S S I
A AN NN SSSS I

RRRRRR U U L ZZZZZZ !
R R U U L Z !
RRRRRR U U L Z !
R R U U L Z !
R R U U L Z !
R R UUUUUUUU LLLLLL ZZZZZZ .

Posted by COMTE | June 22, 2007 3:53 PM
31

That was supposed to say "ANSI RULZ!" in well - ANSI, but I guess these new-fangled Intertubes don't do that anymore...

Posted by COMTE | June 22, 2007 3:55 PM
32

Hey gopher is still being used, ya know.

gopher://gopher.quux.org/1/

Posted by Tiffany | June 22, 2007 4:05 PM
33

It's true. Back in 2003-2004 MSN had to make their own toolbar to add features to IE, because the IE team was just four guys doing security fixes. That's what monopoly gets you. Thank God for Firefox.

Posted by carlos | June 22, 2007 4:11 PM
34

I'm pre-Griffey Sr. (I was busy watching Julio Franco playing shortstop at Memorial Stadium), but I hand it to Griffey the Younger for turning my trasnplantdom into Mariners fandom. '95 sealed the deal for a lot of us, I'm sure. Seattle fucking over New York City?

The guy was (and still is - as we're all the same number of years older now, ya crusters) a natural and fluid combination of muscle, instincts, skill, desire and mental make-up. Having played sports as a younger man and continuing now as the ever-so-classy weekend warrior, I'm envious of his stamina, tenacity and desire to play, amazed that Griffey still has that effortless stroke, and that a guy of his age still scares the shit out of kids of the age he once was. Props to him.

And Gomez, I agree about FSN's vulturing of the whole shitbang. They're fucking vultures; but because they're goddamned starving vultures. They wouldn't be so nostalgic about all these old-timers if they were filling the seats with This Year's Model.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | June 22, 2007 4:30 PM
35

Ignore. Or, enjoy.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | June 22, 2007 4:34 PM
36

in the world of annoying software, no one tops realplayer. why is keeping notifications turned off so hard? fuck them. if so many sites weren't locked in it would have no place on my hd.

Posted by donte | June 22, 2007 4:39 PM
37

The best part will be when it gets scratched.

Or dunked in a tall glass of hard cider ...

Posted by Will in Seattle | June 22, 2007 4:44 PM
38

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Posted by oxvlg gxoqlpak | June 25, 2007 3:16 PM
39

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Posted by oxvlg gxoqlpak | June 25, 2007 3:18 PM

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