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Wednesday, May 30, 2007

The Tragedy of Heterosexual Parenting

posted by on May 30 at 14:55 PM

Over at Americablog John Aravosis has posted the complete text of a press release put out by Stephen Bennett, the sometimes spokesman for the Concerned Women of America—that’s right, the spokesman for all those concerned ladies. This particular press release is from some organization that I’ve never heard of—The Parents Group—and and it makes me want to go hunt through all the tubes on the Internets looking for more horrifying “Every Child Deserves a Mother and a Father” Slog posts.

Bennett has his panties in a knot because the White House released a picture of Dick and Lynn Cheney with their new grandchild, Samuel David Cheney. Little Sam is the first dude to see the inside of Mary Cheney’s vaginal canal in a long, long time—Mary is a lesbian, you see, and she had this baby with her lesbian partner, Heather Poe. And Bennett crapped his pants when he saw this photo and its caption on the White House’s official website:

His parents are the Cheney’s daughter Mary, and her partner, Heather Poe.

Says Bennett…

Heather Poe is Mary Cheney’s live-in lesbian lover. She may act like a parent, she may treat the baby as a parent, she may love this baby with all of her heart, but in this reality we all live in, Heather Poe is NOT the baby’s real parent. She has NO biological connection to the child whatsoever. Some man, the baby’s real Daddy, is the child’s other REAL parent….

President George W. Bush held several presses conferences calling for a Federal Marriage Amendment to protect the God-ordained institution of marriage between one man and one woman, while homosexuals pushed for the union of two men or two women to be equally recognized as real “marriage.”

However, the President’s number two, right hand man, Vice President Dick Cheney, clearly rebels against his superior, makes a public mockery of the President and the current Administration he is supposed to represent, and clearly holds to a different set of moral standards and beliefs.

When President Bush stood on the victory stage several years ago after being elected into office by values voters, Mary Cheney was on stage as well with her lesbian lover, Heather Poe. It was a slap in the face to the values voters who had just elected the duo into office. That wound has never healed.

I’m right there with you, Stephen. Seeing Mary Cheney and Heather Poe up on stage with Bush on election night 2004 made me burst a few blood vessels too. It pissed off every thinking queer in the country—but instead of being pissed at Bush for allowing those dykes to stand on that stage with him, we were pissed at those dykes for standing on that stage with Bush after Karl “My Daddy Sucked Cock” Rove’s gay bashing campaign.

But Stephen Bennett isn’t content to merely point out the hypocrisy of the Bush and Cheney families when it comes to gay rights. (“Gays we’re related to have rights, gays we’re not related to don’t.”) No, he has to haul out the every-child-needs-a-mother-and-a-father crap—and use the most slashing, hateful possible language.

While this little innocent child Samuel David Cheney deserves every fighting chance at life, the sins of two women, Mary Cheney and Heather Poe, have deliberately denied the Vice President’s grandson one of the most basic human rights of all: the right to a Daddy and a Mommy.

I say shame on the White House, shame on the President and shame on the Vice President for allowing such a caption to be “officially” added onto the White House website and such a beautiful photo of two happy grandparents and their new grandchild.

I guess we can tragically and officially say both the White House and Bush Administration have officially recognized the sinful sexual unions of homosexuals, as well as recognized and embraced the tragedy of the social experiment of homosexual parenting.

You can’t pick up a newspaper or turn on the television without being confronted by yet another tragic example of terrible heterosexual parenting. You want tragedy, Stephen? A heterosexual parent in Texas hanged her four children yesterday and herself. The foster care system is packed with children failed by their heterosexual parents—and many of these children are adopted by same-sex couples.

Samuel Cheney is going to be fine. Not only is his family wealthy and powerful, but little Sam benefits from the singular advantage that all children born to or adopted by same-sex couples enjoy: Sam is a wanted child. Gay couples can’t get drunk and adopt one night; lesbian couples don’t accidentally get themselves inseminated. While most opposite-sex couples that find themselves accidentally pregnant rise to the challenge and make great parents (mine included), a distressingly large number do not. That’s the tragedy of heterosexual parenting, Stephen, and its fruits are everywhere on display.

Drug dealing dead holds children and wife hostage in filthy house for four years.

Vegan straight couple starves infant son to death.

Mom and dad put two boys in cage and lock shock collars used by dog trainers on them.

Mom mutilates baby boy’s genitals—cuts his penis clear off—while dad’s at work.

Mom and Dad give baby fatal drug overdose—“a cocktail of pills, including Mylanta, Unisom, Zantac, Benadryl and Sudafed”—while on family vacation.

Dad murders daughter by crashing his twin-engine plane into the home the child’s grandmother.

Mom and dad use 100,000 volt stun gun on their 18 month-old son—again and again.

Susan Smith, Andrew Yates, Scott Peterson—I could go on and on.

But, hey, I don’t doubt that children abused, neglected, abandoned, and murdered at the hands of their heterosexual parents take comfort in knowing that they were abused, neglected, abandoned, and murdered by their REAL parents.

So pull your fat fucking nose out of the Mary and Heather’s business, Stephen, and look to the plight of children living in the Bible Belt. Child abuse, neglect, abandonment—the more religious a state, the greater the danger it seems to pose to children. What did Jesus say about eyes and specks of sawdust and great planks?

RSS icon Comments

1

Hmmm. Now, if he'd write about the Bush twins not serving in combat in Iraq, that might be something ...

Posted by Will in Seattle | May 30, 2007 2:59 PM
2

You Go Girl!

Posted by Lesbian Mom | May 30, 2007 3:03 PM
3

Bush(Rove) by far is the most manipulative sack of shit out there. Notice how this guy instantly assumes Bush is the unwilling victim here of bad bad Cheney. I mean Bush is the president, right? Why do these idiots absolve him of any responsibility?

Posted by D. | May 30, 2007 3:06 PM
4

You missed the fact that he slighted foster and _any_ adoptive parents. Stephen "Assface" Bennett basically said that adoptive parents are worth anything either. What a blowhard.

But on the other hand, if this does anything to fracture the GOP or disenfranchise the "value voters", let the man march.

Posted by Som Guy | May 30, 2007 3:10 PM
5

If there IS a god these people will get what they deserve. And if there is NO god... well then these people will get what they deserve.

Posted by monkey | May 30, 2007 3:15 PM
6
Drug dealing dead holds children and wife hostage in filthy house for four years.

Goddamn zombie drug dealers. Now those fuckers should never be allowed to have kids.

Posted by Judah | May 30, 2007 3:16 PM
7

How does Bennett classify heterosexual couples who adopt children? Are they not parents of those children because they didn't create them from their own sperm and eggs?

What a dickshit.

Posted by Carollani | May 30, 2007 3:21 PM
8

After alcoholic dad, alcoholic/drug-dealing stepdad, and just plain asshole stepdad #2, I'm beginning to think two mommies might not have been all that bad.

Posted by Jordyn | May 30, 2007 3:24 PM
9

Why don't you contact him directly, Dan? I'm sure the douchebag has an e-mail address.

Posted by Gomez | May 30, 2007 3:31 PM
10

There's no use in making rational arguments with superstitious religious extremists. They are irrational and ugly in their ignorance; like stubborn children who throw tantrums & hold their breath until they get their way.

Posted by special K | May 30, 2007 3:47 PM
11

Wow. What a power-tard. My step dad isn't tied to me by blood, but he's been a great parent. What happens when my lil' sis' and her girlfriend want a kid? That douchebag would rather kids whent to that guy who stuck his baby in a microwave. Thanks for fighting the good fight, Mr. Savage.
-Woodbun

Posted by Woodbun | May 30, 2007 4:08 PM
12

Wow. What a power-tard. My step dad isn't tied to me by blood, but he's been a great parent. What happens when my lil' sis' and her girlfriend want a kid? That douchebag would rather kids whent to that guy who stuck his baby in a microwave. Thanks for fighting the good fight, Mr. Savage.
-Woodbun

Posted by Woodbun | May 30, 2007 4:08 PM
13

"She has NO biological connection to the child whatsoever."

Um, I was adopted (by heteros). Is he trying to say that since there is no biological connection that they aren't my real parents? My dad would be super pissed to find that out after all of these years.

Posted by kim | May 30, 2007 4:15 PM
14

Don't you EVER stop, Dan! Keep that loud voice of yours going!

Posted by Sachi | May 30, 2007 5:22 PM
15

Does Stephen Bennett have kids? What if they end up gay?

Isn't raising children in a homophobic household tantamount to child abuse?

Posted by Jake | May 30, 2007 5:42 PM
16

@13 - As a fellow adoptee this caught my attention too! how disturbing after all these years to learn that my parents doting, feeding, clothing, sheltering, and generally loving me to death, was all a charade! They weren't REAL dammit! I am so sad. I should have been aborted.

Or, maybe Mr Bennet is just an unconscionable DOOOOOSHBAG who never had a good mommy and daddy (or daddy and daddy) himself.

Posted by longball | May 30, 2007 8:57 PM
17

Children do not need "a mother and a father", they need CARING ADULTS and more is better. People like this guy just have no idea what they are talkig about and jump to their self-righteous conclusions.

Posted by east coaster | May 30, 2007 9:27 PM
18

With all due respect to the previous 17 posters, I mean that guy is a total a-hole, I have to disagree with Dan on one point. All those bad hetero parents do not invalidate his point however badly articulated it might be. All those people you described are heavy "sinners" by Bennet's standards. He's trying to say that the less sin around a child the more likely they are to be "proper" adults. The irony is that, bible true or not, being gay sin or not, almost all of the same-sex couples present a genuinely cleaner lifestyle. A more "biblical" environment if you will, but guys like Bennet are to interested in separating the sheep from the goats to realize they are not the shepards.

Posted by Skeezer | May 30, 2007 11:05 PM
19

Question, Dan: do you ever send your mini-essays to whom it was written for?

Posted by Steve | May 30, 2007 11:21 PM
20

Adotive parents aren't as good a birth ones? Ok than that means one of my cousins needs to go back to her abusive birth mom who she barely remembers. I'll also have to stop thinking of her as a cousin. One of my friends will have to go back to her alcholic, abusive, drug using mom. And another of my friends will have to go back to Russia and see if his mom is even alive.
That is so messed up. I know so many families who aren't at all blood related but give their kids so much love that it should never even matter. They'd never abuse or hurt their children in anyway, unlike some birth parents.
I'm about to go into a full on rant, so I'll stop here.

Posted by Sarah | May 31, 2007 6:08 AM
21

Dan, I noticed the links on this post mostly lead back to this page itself, and I was interested in finding the original stories, is there any way you could post links to actual articles for those missing, I tried googling but failed...

Posted by neeraja | May 31, 2007 6:22 AM
22

Let the Republicans eat their own.

Posted by Tiny Ballerina | May 31, 2007 6:35 AM
23

Too bad people have to sort through your sensationalism to get to your real and true point: good or bad parenting can happen in any type of family.

This stuff belongs on the liberal side of Fox News though: "the more religious a state, the greater the danger it seems to pose to children"

WTF? Dogmatic religion isn't the problem, asinine government isn't the problem, small towns aren't even the problem really (though they scare the shit out of me).

PEOPLE ARE THE PROBLEM. Some of us are just fucked up. Blame it on more bad parents, nature/nurture whatever.

Posted by Ryan | May 31, 2007 7:27 AM
24

Ryan @ 23:

If people are the problem, why are the problems overwhelmingly (and over a long period of time) concentrated in particular areas (such as Texas)? I don't mean to suggest that Dan's hypothesis must necessarily be the only one, but if I certain subsection of the population consistently engages in a particular type of behavior more than the rest, there must be an explanation.

Posted by David | May 31, 2007 7:44 AM
25

@10 I agree wholeheartedly.

This guy is just another of many, many people who are suffering from a cultural psychosis that, left unchecked, leads to violence and horrific acts of inhumanity. Don't try to argue with him - it only gives credibility to his psychosis. Instead just try to explain that an intelligent person understands how damaging this kind of mental illness can be, advise him to get treatment before he harms himself or others, and then walk away before your day is ruined.

Posted by Cat | May 31, 2007 8:23 AM
26

Wait, is this the same Stephen Bennett who was gay himself until the age of 28? Who calls homosexuality "SSA" (same-sex addiction, not to be confused with "SBM," which is not Serious Bowel Movement but the (wholly analogous) Stephen Bennett Ministries, Inc.), as if “SSA” were some sort of medical condition like ADD or an STD? The same Stephen Bennett whose entire “ministry” is devoted, so sayeth his website, to “compassionately ministering to those affected” with homosexuality? If so, this man is indeed an Evangelical RoboDouche in need of some serious Mockery and Scorn.

Posted by Wender J. Crinklebank | May 31, 2007 8:39 AM
27

Oh holy shitballs.

Mr. Bennett is also responsible for NotOurKids.com, a website/movement devoted to "protecting America's youth and educating parents about the dangers of homosexual activism and indoctrination in America's public schools." Because we all know that is running rampant in the public school system, all that homosexual activism and indoctrination.

Why, just the other day in my daughter's preschool class they had a visit from Polly McBeavereater, a 6'3" butch gal in a hairy clam costume, who -- with various visual aids and a slideshow narrated by Marlo Thomas -- instructed all the little girls in her class on the Evils of the Penis.

I didn't think anything of it until I found NotOurKids.com. Lord I'm stupid.

Posted by Wender J. Crinklebank | May 31, 2007 8:51 AM
28

What we need to understand is that these people have the mentality of a suicide bomber. Mockery is as lost on them as attempts at reasonable debate. They are on a mission from God and want to purge the world of evil, and while some will not admit it, would resort to violence to do so. Their utopia is a sanitized grid where society exists as a perfectly repeating cycle with no social evolution whatsoever, and people live out their days in sexually castrated, ritual devotion to God, and only engage in family entertainment. The idea that this is even possible is in itself ridiculous. An oppressed, sexually frustrated society quickly becomes cruel, violent and perverted, although it may be well hidden. This kind of delusion is worse than ignorance, it's a mental illness and is entirely counterproductive to the survival of humanity.

Posted by Cat | May 31, 2007 10:19 AM
29

Dan, can I politely and humbly suggest that while we all agree that Stephen Bennett is indeed a Mega-Douche, you consider taking a break from writing about how evil hetero parenting negates conservative arguments against gay parenting?

The reason I ask this is that between you and David Shmader, the last couple of days of slog have been filled with a horror show of child abuse-themed stories, some serious and some alledgedly humorous.

Not everybody will agree with this, but I think all of us who are parents are damaged a little bit whenever we read, much less write or dwell on, these types of stories.

Especially because with slog, you're so clearly preaching to the choir. When you bring this stuff up in Savage Love it's awesome because you *are* writing to folks who might be on the fence about gay parenting/marriage.

Please don't take this as a request to shut up or anything like that. If you wake up in the morning, and gotta talk about hypocrital right wing fuckwads and have to use horrific news stories to do so, so be it. But you might be doing your personal well-being a disservice.

Posted by Big Sven | May 31, 2007 10:48 AM
30

"If people are the problem, why are the problems overwhelmingly (and over a long period of time) concentrated in particular areas (such as Texas)?"

In fighting words:
This is a pretty closed-minded gross generalization of a society made simply because you do not actually live there. It's trite to lob accusations based on cultural differences and to think you know the answer to all of the issues facing their society. Problems which predate organized religion and official government.

In reality:
I agree with you. WTF is up with middle of this country? No clue. I and am far too freaked out when I go there to really attempt to understand the culture or it's issues. The entire time I think they are going to tie me up and drag me behind a truck for looking gay at any moment. I'm not even that effeminate or even gay. I'm just afraid they will see the skinny jeans and t-shirts and hear me ordering vegetarian food and that will be enough.

These are not rational fears though. In fact, the only time anyone has ever driven up in a pick up truck and yelled "die faggot," at me was in fucking Auburn before a show.

The point:
Hate crimes, family crimes, bad parents, rape, war, and whatever else might show up on SVU predates the Bible, Jesus, Texas, Republicans and almost anything that you can blame shit on to make yourself feel better about being human.

Posted by Ryan | May 31, 2007 10:56 AM
31

so ya i'm adopted. does that mean that the 2 people with no genetic ties to me and who have raised me since i was 2 days old aren't my parents? oh god, i feel so lonely.

nice, Bennett

Posted by shelbis | May 31, 2007 12:07 PM
32

Big Sven @ 29: Thank you.

Posted by OddlyEnough | May 31, 2007 12:25 PM
33

Stephen "MegaDouche" Bennett needs to re-read his Bible, and find me the passage that explicitly condemns two women rearing a child. I'm waiting...

And Stevie? I was reared by two women, until I was 11. I was never harmed or traumatized - until my mother tired of life in the closet, and married the first man who asked her - a drunken, abusive, child-molesting asshole. But bigawd, it was a "family values approved" marriage between one (asshole) man and one (closet-case) woman!

Posted by Geni | May 31, 2007 12:37 PM
34

Sending troops to Iraq is one sure fire way of depriving tens thousands of children their mommy or their daddy. (That's domestically and internationally.)

Murder is way more offensive to god then sex...even bad sex.

Posted by Rachel | May 31, 2007 1:37 PM
35

Way to go Dan :)

Posted by 2 Lesbian Parents | May 31, 2007 2:41 PM
36

That picture of the proud grandparents is so poignant I put it on my own blog. You can read the pride all over their faces.

Imagine if they saw this baby harmed in any way either through lack of resources, a war, or prejudice. If only our leaders thought of the future the same way they do when they think of their own grandchildren.

Posted by John Wright | June 1, 2007 7:49 AM
37

Shouldn't Bennets children,(he has 2) be deserving of a father who is hetrosexual? Bennet is a self confessed "Cured Homosexual". He admits to sleeping with over 100 men before being cured! This guy is so full of self hatred I'm surprised he hasnt self combusted. Wouldn't it be great if he got together with Ted Haggard and adoted a Cambodian baby?

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38

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