Celeb Jay-Z Goes Down In a Firey Ball of Terror Maybe! Or, Wait…It Was All a Bunch of Crap!
posted by May 4 at 10:44 AMon
Rumors have been swirling this morning that rapresario Jay-Z ( aka Sean Carter) was in a plane crash this morning.
Not worried? Wait! It’s gets worse!
TMZ has confirmed that a small plane registered to a citizen of Dublin, GA crashed near Asheville, NC in the Smoky Mountains. The FAA tells TMZ that the four-seat propeller plane did go down this morning, but could not provide any additional details.
And according to sources creepy and unnameable, Jay-Z has allegedly chartered exactly such a plane, and when last heard from, he was en route to Vegas to watch some manly sporting event thingy that I don’t know anything about.
Is Jay-Z alive? Is he not alive? Was he on that damn plane at all? And what does Sanjaya think about all this?
Hang in there, Jay-Z! The rescue party’s a-comin’!
The terrible rumor is but a terrible rumor. And don’t be smug little haters about it either, please. I was genuinely concerned. (He owes me a back rub.) And Jay-Z not being a twisted burning corpse is a GOOD thing.