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Life Despair, Thy Name is DIESEL…

Posted by on April 20 at 10:42 AM

Death of our biosphere? Bring it on! Fashionable footwear is the answer!

Indeed, expensive shoes will spare us all from the terror of global warming…and fill chilly European city squares with fun and cheerful Fruitloops birds! (Follow that nose!) We are assured of this via this jaunty DIESEL ad, which I’ve ripped from some wretched style rag that I don’t read…

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So, fret not, sad world! Shoes! Shoes are the answer!

Doomed. That’s what we are. Pull out your Visa card and kiss your ass goodbye.

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1

And the model is not even hot!

2

Have they not read the Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy? Shoes lead directly to a downward spiral to the END OF THE WORLD.

3

The parrots are nice, and the model is hot.

But won't Venice be completely underwater if the earth warms up so much that tropical birds start making their home there?

4

well...the feet ARE big...

or is that an example of forced perspective?

5

Just because I believe Al Gore, do I have to be offended by these ads? I think they're kind of clever...

6

The Froot Loops bird is a toucan. These appear to be parrots.

7

far be it from me to wax heavy, but to say that i am very concerned about environmental issues would be a gross understatement. i'm terrified. and it wasn't al gore, thank you, i've been painfully aware of these issues forever. tree-hugger? that's me. patchouli-stinking pacifist? all the way. (i never talk about it publically, i know, privately, however...) so this ad, with its total lack of urgency and implications that SHOPPING...well. it's very glib. and i'm the king of fucking glib, so i know. should you be offended? that's your choice. it doesn't offend me. it makes me very sad. it's about as clever as filling the square with floating new orleaneans with the same caption. ha ha. let's shop.

8

At least Piazza San Marco will be healthier with parrots instead of the current residents: disease-carrying pigeons.

9

SeMe, don't badmouth the pigeons. Pigeons carry diseases bc they live in a filthy city. The parrots would carry the same disease - not that these "diseases" you speak of would ever affect a human. And, they are smart.

Hell, the parrots would probably shit bigger and attack humans.

10

I assume, then, that we all find it completely unremarkable that the shoe man is squatting down for a nice sidewalk poo?

Or piazza poo, I guess. Is it OK just because there's no-one else on the piazza, or do we all get the urge to poo on pavement when the parrots arrive?

11

It won't be so bad since global warming guarantees Venice will be completely underwater. Then his supermodel poop would just wash away in the Italian waters.

12

Poor guy,
spent so much on his shoes,
he can't afford to buy socks.

Bet his feet are a slimey mess after a day or two of walking around that piazza scrounging for 'tips'.

It's all good, as long as we can bomb the shit out of everyone.

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