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RSS icon Comments on BREAKING: Pope Hates In-Vitro Fertilization, Celibate Jury-of-One Still Out on Snowflakes

If it canít make a baby, itís not okay with the Pope.
Except when my 71-year-old mother married my 72-year-old step-father; that was okay. The priest was all smiles, in fact. That's to say, if only the Catholic Church were even consistently "baby-centered" in its idiocy. But it ain't.
Posted by A in NC | March 30, 2007 10:39 AM

Can I get this on a bumper sticker?

"Uh, straight people? If youíre going to ignore the Pope when he says idiotic, backwards, retrograde crap about you, then we really ought to ignore him when he says idiotic, backwards, retrograde things about me."
Posted by Alan | March 30, 2007 10:41 AM

The only pope I pay any attention to is The Pope Of Chili Town...

Posted by COMTE | March 30, 2007 10:46 AM

The news media seem to have an unwritten code about defering to the likes of the pope. The other side of that rule is that any non-believer must be portrayed in a negative light.
While I am thinking of this it reminds me of the unspoken rules about media coverage of political demonstrations. That is if tens of thousands of citizens are parading down the street for a redress of their grievances they must never show an aerial view or any picture that shows how many blocks it stretches back. If one person gets arrested that must be featured at the top of the report.

Posted by Sinner | March 30, 2007 11:01 AM

Pope Prada really hates his wiener.

Posted by Patrick | March 30, 2007 11:03 AM

Why thank you COMTE. Know you will always have my blessing.

Besides, maybe the hysterical news media is a good thing. It draws attention to that other Pope's gobbledygook. His claptrap views about straights are old hat. The stuff about gays is new fertile terrain for us to laugh at him about.

Posted by The_Pope_Of_Chili_Town | March 30, 2007 11:31 AM

Honestly, I think we're reaching the point when everyone but the media is ignoring the Pope.

At least the last pope did enough things to merit attention, like apologizing for torturing Galileo. And trying to make amends with the Orthodox and the Jews. I know that this Pope is only a caretaker pope, but he could at least try to be worthwhile. Maybe hold a clambake or something.

Posted by prometheusnox | March 30, 2007 11:41 AM

Breaking: Double standards exist, especially when it comes to the media!
(sorry, I couldn't resist)

Also, I hate to admit it, but I agree with the Dope on the in vitro issue. Granted, my rational is completely different. I'm basically against people making new babies in any way, in vitro or old fashioned F-ing. Until every orphan and or foster kid has a home, people have no business making new ones.

Posted by Mike in MO | March 30, 2007 11:44 AM

Yeah, it hardly seems surprising that a medieval religious institution rejects modern social trends and longs for the good old days. You know, back when they ran everything?

As far as I can tell, the reason the Catholic Church and its pontiff receive the sort of uncritical coverage that, say, Scientology does not has a lot to do with the large numbers of Catholics who read newspapers or watch television news.

Posted by flamingbanjo | March 30, 2007 11:45 AM

Has anyone asked the Pope why he shot at the allies in WWII? I mean he was in the Hitler youth.....

Posted by Andrew | March 30, 2007 12:49 PM

I care about what the pope says as much as I care about what any fat Nazi in a dress says, which is not a whole hell of a lot.

Posted by Giffy | March 30, 2007 12:56 PM

If only the Pope had read The Little Prince.

PRINCE: Sire--over what do you rule?

KING: Over everything.

PRINCE: Over everything?

NARRATOR: The king made a gesture, which took in his planet, the other planets, and all the stars.

PRINCE: Over all that?

KING: Over all that.

NARRATOR: For his rule was not only absolute: it was also universal.

PRINCE: And the stars obey you?

KING: Certainly they do. They obey instantly. I do not permit insubordination.

NARRATOR: Such power was a thing for the little prince to marvel at. If he had been master of such complete authority, he would have been able to watch the sunset, not forty-four times in one day, but seventy-two, or even a hundred, or even two hundred times, without ever having to move his chair. And because he felt a bit sad as he remembered his little planet which he had forsaken, he plucked up his courage to ask the king a favor:

PRINCE: I should like to see a sunset ... Do me that kindness ... Order the sun to set...

KING: If I ordered a general to fly from one flower to another like a butterfly, or to write a tragic drama, or to change himself into a sea bird, and if the general did not carry out the order that he had received, which one of us would be in the wrong? The general, or myself?


KING: Exactly. One must require from each one the duty which each one can perform. Accepted authority rests first of all on reason. If you ordered your people to go and throw themselves into the sea, they would rise up in revolution. I have the right to require obedience because my orders are reasonable.

PRINCE: Then my sunset?

NARRATOR: The little prince reminded him: for he never forgot a question once he had asked it.

KING: You shall have your sunset. I shall command it. But, according to my science of government, I shall wait until conditions are favorable.

PRINCE: When will that be?

KING: Hum! Hum!

NARRATOR: Replied the king; and before saying anything else he consulted a bulky almanac.

KING: Hum! Hum! That will be about--about--that will be this evening about twenty minutes to eight. And you will see how well I am obeyed!

Posted by Gitai | March 30, 2007 1:12 PM

In the same vein: Episcopalians consider birth control and in vitro fertilization to be good things. They accept that divorce can be better than the alternative. They have implemented an affirmative action program nationally and urge it on Dioceses.

That ain't news.

The Episcopal House of Bishops (analogous to the Senate) doesn't chuck the constitution and bylaws of the church to prevent a duly elected bishop from being consecrated, or to prevent other gay bishops from being elected.

That, apparently, is news.

Posted by JenK | March 30, 2007 4:44 PM

Wait, but isn't sex supposed to be all dirty, and babies conceived without it immaculate? Huh?

Posted by Noink | March 30, 2007 11:15 PM

You are correct in my opinion, Dan. Screw the media. Screw the Pope. Everybody take a chill-pill and just mind your own business.

Posted by lawrence clark | March 31, 2007 1:14 AM

hear, hear, Dan! This is one straight guy who opposes all the crap coming from the Pope in one lump sum. When he insults or tries to tell one section of the population that "they're wrong/immoral/whatever", he attacks us all. Wouldn't be so bad if nobody listened to him, but the Catholic church throughout its history has only ceded independent thought and action begrudgingly, if at all.

Now I gotta read that article on him in the new New Yorker, but only after I've eaten breakfast...

Nice post.


Posted by glasspusher | March 31, 2007 7:37 AM

At least he's consistant. Most of the "Life begins at conception" crowd doesn't see anything wrong with discarding leftover embryos from in-vitro.

Posted by Aexia | March 31, 2007 9:58 AM
no birth control, no blowjobs, no pre-marital sex, no yoga
Actually, I'm an atheist straight guy, and this exactly describes my life for the last ~5 years.

And unlike the priests who vow to not do any of the above, I haven't resorted to fondling little boys. Which is why I don't see how the pope, as head of the largest organized child-molestation ring the planet has ever seen, has any authority to dictate morality to anyone.

Posted by Carl | March 31, 2007 11:49 AM

A little late but...
"I know the Pope is infallible, but that doesn't mean he can't make mistakes." --Stephen Colbert from the Colbert Report

Posted by Lizzie | April 2, 2007 10:28 AM

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