welcome back, brendan!
Sounds like Faye doesn't like gay people.
"Your paper is very predictable in Seattle my friend."
Challenge: She should predict the content of next week's paper...in Seattle.
Faye sounds like she is not a former boozer at all. She sounds like she is a current boozer. But once again another quasi-psyco "spiritual" person who is putting curses on people. Just like the Christians.....
I can help, Brendan. There is a quick and easy way to rid yourself of this curse. Sit down with a pair of headphones and listen to "Abba Zabba" by Captain Beefheart. But you've got to really listen, man. It will be taken care of.
PS Do not listen to any Scorpions before the curse has been lifted. This will make matters much worse, and I'd be forced to demand a fee for any further consultation.
i'm grateful SOMEBODY has finally put a terrible curse on brendan...i've been frankly too busy. now his scarf will rot and fall off.
"We'll print a correction in the next issue, Faye."
Yeah, why get all upset about our saying you used to be an alcoholic? We'll apologize. No big deal, right? Sheesh...
Thank you, this totally made my morning. I wish I were in that audience. The article wasn't that mean at all. Yeah, she sounds like she's on the sauce though, haha. Sounds like Miss Cleo was teaching her trade to her fellow inmates.
There is another saying in Gypsy Blood you may also know: "Oooga Booga, Ooooga, Oooga." It means "I am making all of this shit up as I go along."
It is very powerful.
And it appears Brendan did do some research into “metaphysical performers” beforehand… he can obviously spot an amateur cold reading an audience.
She does have a point about Judas Priest, though.
I want to know who Brendan's gay poser boyfriend from the 1980's cover band was.
"Tell your boyfriend I said hi and Judas Priest Kicks The Scorpions ASS!"
She sounds like she come right out of the movie Heavy Metal Parking Lot.
She apparently doesn't see the connection between responding to ad hominem attacks and making ad hominem attacks.
i have seen her balls. they are huge.
How, um, spiritual.
She sounds like a load of crap- doesnt mean she is one, but the way she writes and her misspellings dont help her much.
Speaking of typos- you've got one in the article online, thought I'd point it out.
Finally: curses dont suck, they only suck for those who MAKE them suck.
This is the best thing I have ever read.
It's a false choice! Reasonable people can love both the Scorps and Judas Priest. Just sayin'.
Hurm, if she was REALLY psychic, shouldn't she have foreseen Brendan was going to write a negative review of her "performance" and called him out on it DURING the show, rather than several days afterward?
Wait, wait - I'm sensing this woman has a great deal of anger bottled up inside; perhaps a traumatic childhood encounter, possibly with a close relative that fostered severe self-esteem issues, leading to many years of self-destructive behavior, before she finally got her shit enough together to get off the hooch, lose some weight, and start a career as a "psychic entertainer"?
Hey, this psychic shit is eeeaaaassyy!
How much does that back room at The Rendezvous rent for, anyway?
"You just opened a door to shit" is my new favorite threat/comeback/greeting.
Oh my god, that is so many kinds of awesome, I don't even know what to do.
Good luck Brendan!
my favorite part from her blog: "Now I must punish you Brenden...in the name of all women who are large in stature and tattooed!( and talk to the dead) . When I see him out and about I am going to Lick his face and curse him with the spit from 7 genrations back. Then I am going to hold him down and give him a tattoo...a nice big one on his little fucking head...that says I Love Fat chicks with Big TATS!!""
That poor, rabid woman. Her email would actually be quite frightening if only she used spellcheck, capitalized the beginning of sentences and proper nouns, and decided once and for all whether Brendan's name is spelled with an "o" or an "e".
I would like to comfort you, Brendan Kiley. Oh wait, are you gay? Can you introduce me to your 80's cover band friend? He sounds hot.
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