Slog - Comments on What You Must Do http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do To the two white women in this office who constantly complain to me about the high number of black men who hit on them, the solution is very simple and can be achieved in a matter of months. Lose lots of weight. Do this, get yourself thin, and as the sun will surely set at the end of this day, those black men will surely stop busting moves on you. There it is.... Copyright 2008 Fri, 02 Feb 2007 11:57:15 -0800 Sun, 04 Feb 2007 20:27:13 -0800 http://www.movabletype.org/?v=3.34 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Comment by Jen Graves Charles, I hope you're not referring to me. Because I said I *liked* it. The two best comments in the last month: "You know she was on Baywatch," spoken to both me and my partner on the street, and "The sun has risen!" during a walk to work. That last is my favorite.

And you should add that your explanation to me when we last talked about it was that I look fit to work on a plantation.

]]> Jen Graves http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607966 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607966 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 12:07:59 -0800 Comment by Special K I have experienced this as well, though I am thin... I think black men are just more comfortable flirting then white men are. They seem to enjoy themselves, not taking it too seriously, just having a good time. Whereas most white guys, I'm sorry to say, are afraid. Until they've had a few drinks that is.

]]> Special K http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607968 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607968 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 12:09:00 -0800 Comment by k t jen, can we get a plantation-hand pic of you? i'm not able to imagine it.

]]> k t http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607986 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c607986 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 12:13:29 -0800 Comment by Violet_DaGrinder "The sun has rise."

Dayum!

]]> Violet_DaGrinder http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608022 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608022 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 12:46:36 -0800 Comment by Violet_DaGrinder "The sun has risen."

Dayum!

]]> Violet_DaGrinder http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608023 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608023 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 12:46:47 -0800 Comment by Biff Check out the chapter on sex in the book Black and White Styles in Conflict by Thomas Kochman. Then all will be clear.

]]> Biff http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608070 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608070 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 13:30:12 -0800 Comment by just the other day...
"Damn girl, you gotta boyfriend?"
"I sure do"
"Is he black?"
me, confused, smiling,.. "What?"
"Only a brother could handle that!"

]]> just the other day... http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608085 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608085 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 13:39:21 -0800 Comment by Amy Kate Charles, I was not complaining. I was only saying, in reference to my new hairdo, that it's interesting that the black men in my neighborhood who usually have something to say about me when I pass them on the sidewalk are now mum.

]]> Amy Kate http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608096 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608096 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 13:53:48 -0800 Comment by jamier HAHA! This is my favorite slog post ever!

]]> jamier http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608144 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608144 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 14:40:48 -0800 Comment by Orson To: Jen Graves, Special K, just the other day, and Amy Kate

Question: Is there a difference between your *response* to the black male come-on vs. the white male come-on? (Assuming here that the white male is not "afraid" to make a come-on).

Certainly all white males are not "afraid' as "special k" comments. The psycho-sociology here is clear: Special K and her sisters are more likely to run from the white male come-on because their "good girl" conditioning is triggered by a white male - the father figure; while they are attracted to the black male come-on (and other "bad boys") because it resonates with their repressed "good girl" sensuality.

I'm sure that black males know that white males are their equals as sexual-sensual beings - why not? But they also know that they have an advantage with the "good girls" they meet. Who can blame them? It's rather nice to feel that glow of sexual affirmation from a woman.

My message to the women above and their sisters is this: accept your own sensuality so your lover's skin color is not such an issue.
Tell the men you find attractive, "I choose you."

]]> Orson http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608150 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608150 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 14:47:23 -0800 Comment by jamier PS It sounds like The Stranger could use some diversity training...

]]> jamier http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608154 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608154 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 14:48:59 -0800 Comment by Superfurry Animal Orson wrote:
"The psycho-sociology here is clear: Special K and her sisters are more likely to run from the white male come-on because their "good girl" conditioning is triggered by a white male - the father figure; while they are attracted to the black male come-on (and other "bad boys") because it resonates with their repressed "good girl" sensuality."

This is HILARIOUS. Hey, Orson: Where did you get your Ph.D. in Psycho-Sexuality, Bong-Loader U.?

You've made my Friday. Seriously.

]]> Superfurry Animal http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608194 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608194 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 15:17:50 -0800 Comment by Fuckin' Sick of Harassment This post is bullshit. If folks did a little studying on the issue (which I have in the form of legal research paper) you would know that street harassment is done by men of all races equally.

Also, I actually tried Charles' experiment. I lost weight, 20 lbs, when I lived in NYC thinking that the street harassment would stop. It didn't. And the racial breakdown stayed the same.

]]> Fuckin' Sick of Harassment http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608221 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608221 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 15:27:03 -0800 Comment by Amy Kate Who wants to be skinny (and then be hit on by white guys all the time)? Not me. 'Fuckin' Sick of...': check out http://www.hollabackpnw.blogspot.com for solidarity. My best defense is noise isolating ear buds (they work like earplugs). And this new, wild hair... it's confusing them into speechlessness.

]]> Amy Kate http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608259 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608259 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 15:55:16 -0800 Comment by DOUG. This thread is offensive on so many levels.

]]> DOUG. http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608295 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608295 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 16:24:00 -0800 Comment by Suz This post is true on so many levels!

I will say this about brothers, you always know if they are interested in you or not! I love that.

]]> Suz http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608384 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608384 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 17:41:39 -0800 Comment by DTS Hey Doug, lighten up and go read the Uptight Seattleite.

]]> DTS http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608455 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608455 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 18:54:02 -0800 Comment by catnextdoor I've got a few extra pounds and I love to say it- the black men looooooove me. It's cool though, if you're not into it just respond with some humor and they'll laugh off the decline. Right, Charles? I recall a man asking me once, "C'mon baby, dont you want a big black rug to walk all over?" I said, "Naw, I've already got a cat and he's black too!"

Black men arent the problem, it's the hispanic lovers that drive me crazy. They just stare. I'd rather they would just SAY something. Fucking ANYthing. Staring is creepy, any sane gay boy will tell you that. I'd like to weigh in how to deal with the hispanic construction workers in the trucks before spring starts.... how does a lady blow them off without seeming racist or creeped out?

]]> catnextdoor http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608462 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608462 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 18:55:29 -0800 Comment by postergirl #12: "Where did you get your Ph.D. in Psycho-Sexuality, Bong-Loader U.?"
LOL

]]> postergirl http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608535 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608535 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 21:05:34 -0800 Comment by Victoria I have to say I get hit on more or less equally by all races, save asian guys..figure that out. Getting hit on respectfully? I can count the times that's happened on one hand. Ahem: see below.


http://bitchphd.blogspot.com/2006/06/fuck-fear.html

]]> Victoria http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608572 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608572 Life Fri, 02 Feb 2007 22:14:12 -0800 Comment by Gloria Same, Vic. For some reason, (straight, at least) Asian guys don't speak up.

]]> Gloria http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608782 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c608782 Life Sat, 03 Feb 2007 12:24:48 -0800 Comment by Cate I don't know if that's true in general, but it's certainly true for me. I got hit on by black guys frequently when I was heavier (only creep-tastic ones, though). Now, hardly ever.

I always figured it was because they figured a fat chick would have lower self esteem.

]]> Cate http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c611079 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/what_you_must_do#c611079 Life Sun, 04 Feb 2007 20:27:13 -0800