Comments on Oscars On Tap

say what you will about the carpet, but cate blanchett is now, officially, the only movie star.

Ellen looks like Shirley Partridge, not that it is a bad thing.

White shoes? WTF? I guess I should be glad Ellen isn't wearing sneakers.

omg you missed Sally Kirkland on the red carpet?! CRAZY

Please tell me more specifics of Sally Kirklan's red carpet insanity.

Mark Wahlberg is still hot!

I thought Pan's Labyrinth was Spanish.

Did anyone else cringe at Ellen's insinuation that Penelope Cruz is Mexican?

Actually, Ellen went out of her way to acknowledge PC as Spanish.

And nope, Pan's Labyrinth is Mexican.

I like Amber Breslin way more than that creepy Dakota Fanning...but not as much as Will Smith's kid. He's just so damn charming.

I also have to say, this is the first year the Oscar ceremony is actually, truly keeping me entertained. I've actually laughed several times. And I haven't even opened the bottle of wine yet!

How can you hate a 10 year old girl so much?

I agree. That comedy musical number with Will Ferrell and Jack Black was deeply funny.

I'm just kidding. Abigail Breslin is adorable, I just don't want her to accidentally win an Oscar, so I'm hoping to sway public opnion with my excessive ill will.

Wait, that was funny, but the Snow White number, which was at least actually rehearsed, was awful? I don't understand.

Fnarf: The concept of the comedy number was brilliant, and made up for the sloppiness in my book.

Snow White's dream of Old Hollywood while on a blind date with Rob Lowe was an insane idea before either of us were born.

Jessica Biel looked like she could eat her co-presenter for his protein and no net carbs.

She looks great though, even with that fugly dress. Who was the chicken in a suit?

Steeerike one!

DAMN! Arkin? Really? sheesh.

But at least the Rob Lowe/Snow White bit had dancers who could dance. And talented people were nearby; Gene Kelly is briefly visible on the side of the stage. There isn't a soul within a hundred miles of that auditorium tonight who's worth a tenth of Gene Kelly.

Where's the Shiite truck bomb when you need one?

I know! I'm always wrong, and I'm always sure that this is the year I'm going to be right. This is why I'm scared Abigail Breslin is going to win Best Supporting Actress.

One Martin Scorsese is at least equal to one Gene Kelly.

Think that's Abigail's lucky monkey in her lap?

Any five minutes of "American in Paris" is worth more than Scorcese's entire career.

Interpretive dancing by MUMMENCHANZ. (sp?)

SEVENTEEN nominations?

I knew he'd only won one, but damn, Randy, I didn't realize it was that bad.

Fnarf, I'm breaking up with you, your love of "Cattle and Cane" be damned.

Fuck Randy Newman. Gross.

Randy's got a split personality. His film stuff tends to be pap, but damn, his first half dozen records or so are head-crushingly good.

David, you can't break up with me now, I just did my nails!

Listening to these douchebags congratulate themselves for their moral leadership on global warming is puke-inducing. Al Gore is too real a guy to be hanging out with these idiots.

Robotslave speaks the truth.

CANDIDATES NEED --- $$$$$

HOLLYWOOD HAS ---- $$$$$$

douchebag, be careful, Dan has a trademark on that old passe put down of cleaning the vagina

or are straight men now douching a lot these days?

Randy Newman keeps making the same song over and over again. The first 20 times he did that type of song it was good maybe even great. But now?.....no dice.

Like I said, split personality. His early records are... well, they're a bit different from the movie songs.

Al Gore isn't a candidate, and if he does declare, he won't get a significant percentage of his campaign donations from Hollywood. No one does.

Jack Nicholson is 2 pork sandwiches away from being the next Brando.

I'm not sure which was more disturbing--the commercial turning people into M&Ms, or the writer of the Departed seeming to teeter VERY close to an emotional breakdown before the orchestra played him out with Gentle Piano...

Every time Randy Newman farts, another catchy tune is born. His is the best pap in the business. Why begrudge him his talent?

We should all hope the Academy doesn't insult Martin Scorsese by giving him an Oscar for a mediocre effort.

True that Robotslave. True that.

I vote for the people turning into M&Ms.

Suggestion: why not just let Jack Nicholson ACTUALLY host next year--he's been trying to for years from the front row...

Shall we all wonder to guess what Tom just whispered into his former boss's ear?