Slog - Comments on Oscars On Tap http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap So, the official Academy Awards preshow will be starting in seconds. The red carpet is one of the only parts of the Oscars I don't give a shit about--even the best red carpet interviewers suck--so I'll just take this time to share my pre-show dreams and concerns. In my dreams, Peter O'Toole will be denied an sentimental Best Actor Oscar, Stranger Genius Award winner James Longley's Iraq in Fragments will win Best Documentary, and Beyonce will trip and fall on international television. In my nightmares, anyone other than Martin Scorsese or Paul Greengrass takes Best Director, and Jennifer Hudson's Best... Copyright 2008 Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:12:51 -0800 Sun, 25 Feb 2007 19:08:50 -0800 http://www.movabletype.org/?v=3.34 http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss Comment by annie say what you will about the carpet, but cate blanchett is now, officially, the only movie star.

]]> annie http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648956 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648956 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:18:44 -0800 Comment by impossible prince Ellen looks like Shirley Partridge, not that it is a bad thing.

]]> impossible prince http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648963 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648963 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:38:51 -0800 Comment by keshmeshi White shoes? WTF? I guess I should be glad Ellen isn't wearing sneakers.

]]> keshmeshi http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648966 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648966 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:48:55 -0800 Comment by Explorer omg you missed Sally Kirkland on the red carpet?! CRAZY

]]> Explorer http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648968 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648968 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:50:23 -0800 Comment by David Schmader Please tell me more specifics of Sally Kirklan's red carpet insanity.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648969 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648969 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:53:16 -0800 Comment by impossible prince Mark Wahlberg is still hot!

]]> impossible prince http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648970 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648970 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:56:25 -0800 Comment by keshmeshi I thought Pan's Labyrinth was Spanish.

Did anyone else cringe at Ellen's insinuation that Penelope Cruz is Mexican?

]]> keshmeshi http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648971 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648971 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:56:42 -0800 Comment by David Schmader Actually, Ellen went out of her way to acknowledge PC as Spanish.

And nope, Pan's Labyrinth is Mexican.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648973 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648973 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 17:59:10 -0800 Comment by Joey The Girl I like Amber Breslin way more than that creepy Dakota Fanning...but not as much as Will Smith's kid. He's just so damn charming.

I also have to say, this is the first year the Oscar ceremony is actually, truly keeping me entertained. I've actually laughed several times. And I haven't even opened the bottle of wine yet!

]]> Joey The Girl http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648974 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648974 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:09:32 -0800 Comment by Gitai How can you hate a 10 year old girl so much?

]]> Gitai http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648976 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648976 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:10:33 -0800 Comment by David Schmader I agree. That comedy musical number with Will Ferrell and Jack Black was deeply funny.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648977 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648977 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:10:56 -0800 Comment by David Schmader I'm just kidding. Abigail Breslin is adorable, I just don't want her to accidentally win an Oscar, so I'm hoping to sway public opnion with my excessive ill will.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648978 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648978 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:12:31 -0800 Comment by Fnarf Wait, that was funny, but the Snow White number, which was at least actually rehearsed, was awful? I don't understand.

]]> Fnarf http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648980 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648980 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:13:02 -0800 Comment by David Schmader Fnarf: The concept of the comedy number was brilliant, and made up for the sloppiness in my book.

Snow White's dream of Old Hollywood while on a blind date with Rob Lowe was an insane idea before either of us were born.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648981 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648981 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:16:22 -0800 Comment by Monique Jessica Biel looked like she could eat her co-presenter for his protein and no net carbs.


She looks great though, even with that fugly dress. Who was the chicken in a suit?

]]> Monique http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648984 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648984 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:20:54 -0800 Comment by robotslave Steeerike one!

]]> robotslave http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648985 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648985 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:23:46 -0800 Comment by genevieve DAMN! Arkin? Really? sheesh.

]]> genevieve http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648986 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648986 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:25:47 -0800 Comment by Fnarf But at least the Rob Lowe/Snow White bit had dancers who could dance. And talented people were nearby; Gene Kelly is briefly visible on the side of the stage. There isn't a soul within a hundred miles of that auditorium tonight who's worth a tenth of Gene Kelly.

Where's the Shiite truck bomb when you need one?

]]> Fnarf http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648987 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648987 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:26:20 -0800 Comment by David Schmader I know! I'm always wrong, and I'm always sure that this is the year I'm going to be right. This is why I'm scared Abigail Breslin is going to win Best Supporting Actress.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648988 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648988 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:27:14 -0800 Comment by David Schmader One Martin Scorsese is at least equal to one Gene Kelly.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648989 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648989 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:28:13 -0800 Comment by Explorer Think that's Abigail's lucky monkey in her lap?

]]> Explorer http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648990 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648990 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:29:15 -0800 Comment by Fnarf Any five minutes of "American in Paris" is worth more than Scorcese's entire career.

]]> Fnarf http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648991 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648991 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:30:50 -0800 Comment by Explorer Interpretive dancing by MUMMENCHANZ. (sp?)

]]> Explorer http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648992 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648992 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:31:47 -0800 Comment by robotslave SEVENTEEN nominations?


I knew he'd only won one, but damn, Randy, I didn't realize it was that bad.

]]> robotslave http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648993 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648993 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:32:31 -0800 Comment by David Schmader Fnarf, I'm breaking up with you, your love of "Cattle and Cane" be damned.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648994 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648994 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:32:54 -0800 Comment by Monique Fuck Randy Newman. Gross.

]]> Monique http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648995 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648995 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:33:11 -0800 Comment by robotslave Randy's got a split personality. His film stuff tends to be pap, but damn, his first half dozen records or so are head-crushingly good.

]]> robotslave http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648998 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648998 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:40:10 -0800 Comment by Fnarf David, you can't break up with me now, I just did my nails!

Listening to these douchebags congratulate themselves for their moral leadership on global warming is puke-inducing. Al Gore is too real a guy to be hanging out with these idiots.

]]> Fnarf http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648999 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c648999 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:41:17 -0800 Comment by David Schmader Robotslave speaks the truth.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649003 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649003 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:45:08 -0800 Comment by eric CANDIDATES NEED --- $$$$$

HOLLYWOOD HAS ---- $$$$$$

douchebag, be careful, Dan has a trademark on that old passe put down of cleaning the vagina

or are straight men now douching a lot these days?

]]> eric http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649005 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649005 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:49:39 -0800 Comment by Monique Randy Newman keeps making the same song over and over again. The first 20 times he did that type of song it was good maybe even great. But now?.....no dice.


]]> Monique http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649007 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649007 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:50:16 -0800 Comment by robotslave Like I said, split personality. His early records are... well, they're a bit different from the movie songs.

]]> robotslave http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649008 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649008 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:54:14 -0800 Comment by Fnarf Al Gore isn't a candidate, and if he does declare, he won't get a significant percentage of his campaign donations from Hollywood. No one does.

]]> Fnarf http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649009 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649009 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:54:36 -0800 Comment by Joshica Jack Nicholson is 2 pork sandwiches away from being the next Brando.

]]> Joshica http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649011 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649011 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:56:17 -0800 Comment by Andy Niable I'm not sure which was more disturbing--the commercial turning people into M&Ms, or the writer of the Departed seeming to teeter VERY close to an emotional breakdown before the orchestra played him out with Gentle Piano...

]]> Andy Niable http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649012 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649012 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:57:34 -0800 Comment by Sean Every time Randy Newman farts, another catchy tune is born. His is the best pap in the business. Why begrudge him his talent?

We should all hope the Academy doesn't insult Martin Scorsese by giving him an Oscar for a mediocre effort.

]]> Sean http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649014 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649014 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:58:30 -0800 Comment by Monique True that Robotslave. True that.


]]> Monique http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649015 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649015 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:58:53 -0800 Comment by David Schmader I vote for the people turning into M&Ms.

]]> David Schmader http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649016 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649016 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 18:59:08 -0800 Comment by Andy Niable Suggestion: why not just let Jack Nicholson ACTUALLY host next year--he's been trying to for years from the front row...

]]> Andy Niable http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649018 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649018 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 19:03:04 -0800 Comment by Andy Niable Shall we all wonder to guess what Tom just whispered into his former boss's ear?

]]> Andy Niable http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649025 http://slog.thestranger.com/2007/02/oscars_on_tap#c649025 TV Sun, 25 Feb 2007 19:08:50 -0800