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Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Oh, Paula… Paula… Paula…

posted by on January 31 at 14:03 PM

For those of you buzzing over the news that walking trainwreck COURTNEY LOVE is being considered as a possible replacement for walking trainwreck PAULA ABDUL on American Idol… well, you never really believed that did you? Unfortunately, Courtney apparently bought it, and Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe spoke to US Weekly today, confirming that Ms. Love has indeed been punk’d.

“I did not call Courtney Love and am afraid someone may have misrepresented me. Courtney Love is a very talented artist, but the judges for American Idol are Paula, Randy and Simon. We have no plans to add to or replace any of them,” said Lythgoe.

NO DUH. Replacing Paula with Courtney is like replacing Pete Doherty with Kate Moss. But I have to admit, after Paula’s weirdly hyper, jaw gnashing performance last night—and sudden disappearance—can a replacement really be that far away?
Here’s one of the better, and more surprising auditions of the night, CHRIS SLIGH, with Paula having a goofball freakout at around the 2:07 mark. SO WHAT DO YOU SAY, SLOGGIES? What kind of alcoholic/prescription cocktail is she on, anyway?

RSS icon Comments

1

she's on Vicadin and coffee.

Posted by postergirl | January 31, 2007 2:29 PM
2

I wonder when making fun of Paula for her symptoms of RSD will become passé.

Sure she's not Michael J. Fidgety, but still it's more sad than funny.

Posted by seattle98104 | January 31, 2007 2:31 PM
3

oh and that dude's gonna win it.

Posted by seattle98104 | January 31, 2007 2:35 PM
4

Cut his hair, and I'd hit that.

Posted by chubby chaser | January 31, 2007 3:05 PM
5

Not so fast folks. Chris Sligh attended Pensacola Christian College and the mighty hater-haven Bob Jones University. He's my pick for this year's "American Idol Contestant to Denounce 'Gay Lifestyle' Publicly for Little or No Reason."

Posted by h0rati0sanzserif | January 31, 2007 3:13 PM
6

Nope; it's way more funny than sad...

If she's got a legitimate medical condition, then she needs to get treatment and not act like an ass on T.V. If she's whacked out on painkillers and no one on the show is doing an intervention that's not my responsibility...wait, i'll take the responsibility: HEY PAULA, IF YOU ARE READING THIS AND IF YOU DO HAVE A DRUG PROBLEM, YOU NEED TO GET SOME HELP, GIRLFRIEND!!

there, i've done the responsible thing.

And as to Paula's very entertaining performance last night,what's great is to compare it to previous weeks, where she was practically comatose...girl is on a roller coaster ride!

Posted by michael strangeways | January 31, 2007 3:33 PM
7

How are the ratings on this season, after the premiere set records? I haven't heard anyone talking about the show since the morning after the Seattle tryouts episode(s). Never mind; I actually stopped caring about the answer midway through typing that sentence.

Posted by Peter | January 31, 2007 4:04 PM
8

@1 -- Instead of flailing all over the place like she's let herself drift into, if Paula were finding the sweet spot between the pills and the java she'd be the Phillipe Petit of the panel. Right on the middle of the tightrope.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | January 31, 2007 7:52 PM
9

Fuck. Philippe. Forget it. Although if he could SING, he would win American Idol.

Posted by Lloyd Clydesdale | January 31, 2007 7:58 PM
10
Posted by mng | January 31, 2007 9:38 PM
11

Ms. Love would be brillant on this show. Ratings would soar.

Expect nasty verbal free for alls, fist fights maybe - liven it up a lot.

Paula is sweet and talented. Simon is making billons, the talent is awesome on the stage - new singers are a prime commodity in the music machine.

Posted by mister re post | February 1, 2007 4:49 AM

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