Slog News & Arts

Line Out

Music & Nightlife

« Obama Hunts FOX! | This Weekend at the Movies »

Friday, January 26, 2007

God’s Gift to Socializing Stoners

posted by on January 26 at 15:08 PM

scaled.tamales.jpg

That’s right: Hot Tamales—“America’s Favorite Cinnamon Candy” and nature’s most perfect food—has a minty new sibling. Hot Tamales Ice are identified as “Chewy Mint Flavored Candies,” which comes close to summing up what they actually are, which is edible gum.

Really, if you’ve ever been hungry for gum, you MUST try Hot Tamales Ice, as they will help you actualize a dream. However, as candy, Ice can’t hold a candle to original recipe Hot Tamales, which are also kinda like edible gum, but at least the gum’s Big Red instead of Doublemint.

Most importantly, if you’re one of those stoners who likes to mingle with the people—at art galleries, movie houses, or Marijuana Anonymous meetings—Hot Tamales Ice are literally a godsend (the first one since Jesus, as Eric Grandy pointed out), singlehandedly conquering both the munchies and musty stoner mouth.

Thank you, Ferrera Pan.

RSS icon Comments

1

Sweet!

I call for a Tingle Mingle party.

Posted by Nay | January 26, 2007 3:36 PM
2

Um, what about Mentos? You eat them, they're gum-like, and they are certainly minty.

Posted by Aislinn | January 26, 2007 3:54 PM
3

Shouldn’t they call them something like Breezy Burritos or something? Chilly Chalupas?

Posted by JC | January 26, 2007 4:03 PM
4

Oh yeah, Mentos....word on the street is they're "the freshmaker"...

Posted by David Schmader | January 26, 2007 4:05 PM
5

OK, great, but why is there an angry sperm on the box?

Posted by robotslave | January 26, 2007 4:12 PM
6

if you’ve ever been hungry for gum

best line of the day. thanks, schmader!

Posted by kerri harrop | January 26, 2007 5:58 PM
7

So I take it that you're going for a Seattle-hipster/Seinfeldian Observations on the Ordinary and Everyday sort of thing these days? Do yourself a favor and don't.

Posted by Not funny...at all. | January 27, 2007 1:05 PM
8

jbhkqxns sxeuqk tvxskfdlc hzylx unbplzq qslwbg umhz

Posted by wijbqz dctmwyzlf | February 4, 2007 2:31 AM
9

jbhkqxns sxeuqk tvxskfdlc hzylx unbplzq qslwbg umhz

Posted by wijbqz dctmwyzlf | February 4, 2007 2:32 AM
10

jbhkqxns sxeuqk tvxskfdlc hzylx unbplzq qslwbg umhz

Posted by wijbqz dctmwyzlf | February 4, 2007 2:33 AM
11

jbhkqxns sxeuqk tvxskfdlc hzylx unbplzq qslwbg umhz

Posted by wijbqz dctmwyzlf | February 4, 2007 2:33 AM

Comments Closed

In order to combat spam, we are no longer accepting comments on this post (or any post more than 14 days old).