Received in the mail by Brad, and reproduced verbatim by the news team’s intern Brian for your Monday astral enjoyment. Goes down best with a delicious dose of melatonin.

Greetings, I bring you new inspiration from the Angels of “All that Is.” I down the number 3,441,555,213,424 and smiled. I asked the Angels on the moon to make a time portal at the center of moon crater Herschel. So people can try to Astrally project 3 trillion years in the future. Crater Herschel is 41 kilometers across. At its center every Tousday at 3pm for 9 minutes the portal will open (Maryland D.C. time) I think you can detect that same spot in our galaxy in the far future. A wave of soul power will accur starting Jan 2 2007. I call it the “keep talking” portal. And try to give prison inmates a free melatonin pill every night. Angels will appear every tousday to fill you in on how to Astrally project your soul into the far future. On the phycic shore where souls go after death you are blessed. I asked the Angels to naturally tranfer you in the future time to the same arm of the galaxy and the same quadrent of stars where we are. The Devil might be an accultic tructster that sends messengers of satin in spaceships to our solar system. These want to fling the recently departed down a tunnel another Galaxy. I want the right foot of every willing soul traveler to the future 3 trillion years hence to be stepped into the portal so you can feel it. And this helps your soul is not flang to another galaxy after your death.