Politics Slog Pulls Ahead!
posted by December 20 at 11:23 AM
onWe may not need to release the results of our opposition research after all—Slog has pulled ahead of Victrola. As of now, with 48 votes counted, Slog is leading 67% to 33%. That’s a 34% lead, which looks comfortable—but the polls are open for the next four days (or so CHS says), and this is no time for complacency. Click here and vote Slog!
And while you’re there, vote Squirrel!
Comments
May I humbly make the case for Victrola over Slog?
1) Victrola is the underdog in this race, given the medium (internet)
2) I have read many a fine book at Victrola over the years, be it early in the morning before work or late at night writing papers for school.
3) Slog promotes cynicism, sarcasm, know-it-all blabberings (probably no more than blogs in general, not that I'm an expert)
4) Victrola has good sandwiches
OK, that is all. Get out the vote.
Victrola has a blog. And a million customers in and out all day long. They can campaign too. And they have four days to do it.
Fuck the squirrels. Vote John/Thomas.
Do NOT vote squirrels. Diseased rodents. Fat invaders from the east. Making nests in attics running around while you try to sleep. Raspy screams when they are unhappy.
John/Thomas is not my favorite street. Really there isn't much there, but at least it has bus stops. And cars that kill squirrels.
Oh shit! I accidentally voted for Victrola and I meant to click Slog! I want a new ballot!
I'll bet if you erase your cookies you can vote again.
What are you going to do when it's Slog v. Squirrels? That's going to be a tough race...
Squirrels are holy, quasi-mystical beasts. And they are no more diseased that we are - probably less so.
I doubt anyone at the Stranger looks like Michael Landon.
Our squirrel does. That's why I will vote Squirrel.
Little Buddy.
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