So… like… you can’t bring a full bottle of shampoo on to an airplane, but some germphobe can carry battery-powered air filter that can burst into flames?

Fire on Plane Forces Landing in Colorado

A personal air filter sparked a fire Friday on a Continental Airlines jet with 160 people on board, forcing an emergency landing.

Six people were taken to a hospital, officials said. Their condition was not immediately known, John McGinley, Colorado Springs Airport’s assistant director of operations, told The Gazette of Colorado Springs.

Flight attendants put out the flames, and the plane landed safely at around 5 p.m. Mountain time, Continental spokeswoman Julie King told The Associated Press.

The battery-powered device, which is worn around the neck and filters air near the person wearing it, malfunctioned and sparked a fire, King said.

The person was wearing it when it caught fire, but it was unclear how badly hurt the person was.

Late last month I predicted that YouTube (or blogs) would nab Time’s Person of the Year Honors—as a symbol of the radical shift in mass media. Here’s what I wrote:

2006 has been a Year-Zero, history-altering kind of year: The GOP implosion; the on-line upheaval that’s undoing traditional media; and the tragic War in Iraq… I nominate Google/YouTube as 2006’s standard-bearer… I think the Blogosphere—based on its role in upending the traditional media—should also be a candidate for the 2006 title.

I was damn close. The AP reported on Time’s selection today, writing: ” The winners this year were anyone using or creating content on the World Wide Web.”

Indeed, putting a personal computer screen on its cover Time selected YOU as the Person of the Year.

And Drudge sums up the choice this way:

**EXCLUSIVE** 7:38 PM ET… IT’S YOU! YOU were named TIME magazine ‘Person of the Year’ Saturday for the explosive growth and influence of user-generated Internet content such as ‘blogs’, video-file sharing site YouTube and social network MySpace…

In my November Slog, I compared 2006 to years like 1966—watershed, jump-cut kind of years when accumulating forces explode to redefine culture. Interestingly, the AP report on Time’s selection, makes a nod to ‘66:

It was not the first time the magazine went away from naming an actual person for its “Person of the Year.” In 1966, the 25-and-under generation was cited…

La-di-da. Anyway, today’s the 233rd anniversary of the Boston Tea Party. Tonight, Boston Harbor is a tea pot!

As I’m sure any Slog-reading sporstfan has heard, Chicago Bears defensive lineman Tank Johnson is in a heap of trouble. Thursday, suburban cops raided his home while he was at practice, finding six firearms (for which he had no permits) along with his girlfriend, their two children, and a felon who called himself Johnson’s bodyguard—who, thankfully, claimed ownership of the 2.5 ounces of marijuana the cops also found. The raid happened because of repeated complaints by neighbors in the downscale suburb of Gurnee, home of the downscale Great America “amusement park,” about gunshots, pit bulls running wild, folks smokin’ dope on the back porch. Oh, and Johnson is on probation for a prior gun-related offense, and would be in more trouble had a Chicago cop not chosen to forego prosecution for a scuffle in which Johnson allegedly said something to the effect of “If it wasn’t for that badge, I’d kick your ass.”

So, doing the right thing for once, the Bears put him on the inactive list for Sunday’s game and read him the Riot Act. The bullshit gamesmanship—the GM Jerry Angelo claiming that Johnson, like all players, was responsible for his off-field actions, while head coach Lovie Smith claimed that Johnson was being left off the active roster because Smith had to choose the team that gave the Bears the best chance to win—is just the team covering its ass. The team’s best DLman, Tommie Harris, is out for the year, and Johnson is the next best player at that position. The Bears were trying to be relatively responsible citizens and let this guy know that there are boundaries, even for football players, but only in a half-assed way.

So what does the mope do the very next night? Go out clubbing. And at about 1:30 Saturday morning, his “bodyguard” gets shot to death in the 700 block of North Clark Street.

Obviously, a really quick learner Mr. Johnson is not.

I mostly send this your way because, as a Bears fan, I blame Seattle: Johnson played his college ball at the University of Wasthington. Any stories about this Einstein from the U District?

Yesterday, Governor Gregoire demanded a vote between the tunnel option and the re-build option, adding that the tunnel option is, according to the DEIS, “not feasible.”

So, Governor Gregoire: Why are we voting on the tunnel at all?

Pitting the tunnel vs. the re-build is a false choice—and a rigged election that will saddle Seattle with an elevated highway through downtown for another 100 years by default.

Seattle should vote on the only currently fleshed out plan, the re-build, in its own right, up or down.

(And doesn’t voting on the tunnel idea vs. re-build idea violate the two-subject rule?)

If the re-build wins on its own merit, as opposed to winning in opposition to an unfunded tunnel plan, then okay.

But if it loses, well, then: We can look at other options like a tunnel with a real funding plan or a boulevard/transit option—which no one has looked at yet.

KC Exec Ron Sims wants to look at the boulevard/transit option.

Seattle State Senator and former House Transportation Chair, Ed Murray wants to look at the boulevard/transit option.

State House Speaker Frank Chopp wants to look at the boulevard/transit option.

So, let’s look at it.

And I’m tired of hearing that there isn’t a boulevard/transit option. There is. The People’s Waterfront Coalition has laid one out. They say that 25% of riders will transfer to transit. They earmark $200 million for north/south transit fixes. And actually, given that the mid-range price for the re-build is $2.8 billion and the boulevard is $2.1—there may actually be $700 million for transit fixes.

What does $700 million get? I don’t know. So, let’s find out and… study it.

Mean time: Re-build, up or down, in its own right.

I have bad meeting mojo this week. I was scheduled last night to meet a source at the Starbucks at 23rd and Jackson. Of course, when I got there at 5:30, the intersection was pitch black. The outage stretched for as far as I could see. I would have just left but a friend with no cell phone had promised to come get me at 6:30. So … I waited. My source never showed. Wearing rubber boots and a skirt my mom might tsk at, I started to get cold, and attract attention from passersby. I was plotting my escape when a woman started yelling “Call 911!” and young man with blood streaming from his nose ran up and threw himself down on the ground. The boy, a slim, pale, 22-year-old lad from Boise, had decided to skate past a group of red and black-clad young men standing at the entrance of the creepy parking lot behind the Starbucks. The young men jumped the skater. They took his board and his I-Pod. He held onto his wallet. The kid will be okay. He’ll have a black eye and maybe, but I doubt it, a broken nose. When police arrived I tried to talk to them about gangs in Seattle — what I was supposed to talk to my source about. The officer I spoke with said the Central District had lots of gangs (he couldn’t name them) but definitely no Bloods (so why were those kids wearing black and red?). I remain skeptical. To me, Seattle’s gang problem still sounds like a bunch of loose groups of scary, but not exactly organized or murderous, kids. They’re obviously out there, but we have bigger things to worry about. The police left and before frostbite set in, my ride arrived. Two hot toddies later, I had thawed out.

(ALTERNA-CARTOONISTS) Two of Seattle’s most beloved and accomplished cartoonists light up Georgetown’s brand-new Fantagraphics Bookstore: Peter Bagge will screen rarely seen animated shorts produced by Sub Pop and MTV, and Ellen Forney will present her multimedia performance of I Love Led Zeppelin. Everyone will have a good time. (Fantagraphics Bookstore and Gallery, 1201 S Vale St, 658-0110. 6 pm, free.) DAVID SCHMADER

… I totally clicked on this story about iodized salt because it led with an anecdote from Kazakhstan.

Curiously, this piece neglects to mention that iodine isn’t mandatory in salt in the U.S. I have two varieties of non-iodized salt (fleur de sel and kosher) in my cupboard right now.

Last night’s Dope Emporium at CHAC proved to be a success, despite the rain and wind. Those who missed the show missed some of the best local hiphop performances of the year. Oldominion did a dynamite set and made it clear that they are still a force to be reckoned with, still a powerful pack of rappers, still got love for the streets. Abyssinian Creole threw down their humanist hiphop, and Dyme Def, who are produced by Bean One, dissolved any doubt that they have the goods to make a big impact on 2007. Dope Emporium has all that it needs to become an important venue for new hiphop. Let’s hope that Jace, the event’s primary organizer, keeps at it, keeps making it happen.

Charles Mudede and Kelly O interviewed Grynch, Silent Lambs Project, and the mighty D.Black. Check ‘em out.
(Also stay tuned for Larry Mizell’s interview with Specs One)

Strangercrombie 2006 raised $40,000 for Northwest Harvest, making this year’s holiday auction our most successful ever. Brendan Kiley was the Stranger’s editorial point person on the auction this year, Nancy Hartunian was the executive point person—thanks to Brendan and Nancy for all their hard work. But Strangercrombie would be an annual bust if it weren’t for everyone who donated goods and services and everyone out there that bid ‘em up. So thanks to all who participated.

Oh, and due to a lil’ SNAFU, ten items are still up for bidding until tomorrow—including the goddamned, brand-new, tricked-out Vespa. Go, bid, buy!

I just lost the Strangercrombie Cheer Up package at the last minute. LITERALLY!

Bidder Bid Amount Date of bid

quinntheeskimo US $258.10 Dec-15-06 16:59:54 PST

me US $253.10 Dec-15-06 16:12:28 PST

authoress US $250.00 Dec-15-06 16:08:21 PST

me US $227.90 Dec-15-06 15:59:47 PST

authoress US $225.00 Dec-15-06 15:18:46 PST

me US $221.90 Dec-15-06 15:58:44 PST

authoress US $200.00 Dec-15-06 14:58:37 PST

me US $176.90 Dec-15-06 12:47:34 PST

authoress US $175.00 Dec-15-06 14:58:08 PST

Authoress and I were locked in a heated battle for the privilege of seeing Mike Nipper dance, and then along comes quinntheeskimo, a dark horse if ever I saw one. Well played, quinntheeskimo. Everybody gonna jump for joy.

Enjoy this and many other dynamite sentences in the greatest letter every written by a school principal, featured on The Smoking Gun.

From Slog tipper Nick…

Attached is a photo of a big upside-down chunk of a tree taking up all of 14th Ave E near Roy St. It’s resting on a thin telephone wire that can’t be seen in the photo, and seems to be improbably standing mostly on its own collection of small branches.

Bill O’Reilly is at it again. On his Dec. 13 show, he used a confectionery metaphor to pooh-pooh research showing that children reared by same sex parents don’t grow horns. According to Media Matters, O’Reilly suggested that if children didn’t suffer from being raised by gay or lesbian couples “wouldn’t nature then make it that anybody could get pregnant by eating a cupcake?”

Huh?

He also ragged on “very liberal” Seattle PI columnists Joel Connelly and Susan Paynter who, respectively, called the TV mouth on his double standards and specious statistics.

Vote for A-Super Clean!!!

In this week’s Savage Love I beat the living crap out of woman who signed herself “Freaked Out Girl.” Her boyfriend loved to massage her feet—and that was fine with her, until she found out he had a foot fetish. FOG dumped her boyfriend because she didn’t want to date a guy that wasn’t “normal.” No freaks for her, she said.

You know what, FOG? You are the worst kind of sex partner: judgmental, selfish, and cruel… a freakishly petty and sexually immature dumbfuck.

I predict—no, I guarantee—that this is going to come back to haunt you. There is a Karmic Rule Of Kink (KROK), FOG, and it goes something like this: “Dump the honest foot fetishist, and you will marry the dishonest necrophiliac.” Break up with a guy over his relatively tame fetish—and a foot fetish is about as tame as they get—and KROK will make sure your next boyfriend is some lying corpse-fucker who tells you only what you want to hear. (“Honestly, honey, I only like live girls!”) Only after you’ve married the corpse-fucker and had a few kids—once extricating yourself from the marriage becomes a hugely complicated ordeal—will he ask you to lie in a tub of ice until you’re good and cold.

And when you’re lying in that tub of ice—and odds are you will, FOG, because you won’t want to put your poor kids through a divorce—you’ll remember that sweet, harmless foot fetishist whose heart you broke back in college, the man you could have married.

And your heart will break.

Man, I really let her have it. Because, like, everyone knows or should know that no man is “normal,” that all men have fetishes (most women too), and that as fetishists go a guy with a thing for feet is completely harmless.

Uh, this is from yesterday’s New York Times:

Speculation About Foot Fetishist in Killings

When four prostitutes were found slain in a marshy ditch on the outskirts of Atlantic City three weeks ago, each was barefoot, a detail as intriguing as it was mystifying.

So on Monday, after managers and several guests at an Atlantic City hotel where two of the victims had sometimes stayed read an account of a man described as being obsessed with women’s feet—which appeared on a private group’s Web site—they said they recalled a peculiar man who took a room there for three weeks this fall.

What led people at the hotel to wonder about a connection between that man—who registered using an address in Phoenix—and the obsessed man described on the Web site as a serial killer, was one chilling theory in the site’s unofficial account: “He has an extreme foot fetish and has a collection of women’s shoes and the shoes of his victims,â€� the document said.

It went on to speculate that “he may even be known for offering women foot massages.â€�

I take it all back—any man that offers to rub your feet, ladies, should be considered a violent, dangerous predator. And you’re not really “the worst kind of sex partner,” FOG. The worst kind would have to be the kind that kills you and dumps your body in a ditch in Atlantic City. I apologize for exaggerating. You’re the second-worst kind of sex partner.

Due to some miscommunication with ebay, ten of our Strangercrombie packages will be available for bidding until tomorrow at noon. (They closed some auctions early, we set them back up, there’s a ten-day minimum for all auctions, blah blah blah.)

Those packages are (please imagine the rolling of a thousand tiny drums):

1. Silver Platters gift certi�cates.

2. Buy an enthusiastic review of the CD of your choice for The Stranger’s January 25 issue.

3. A gift certificate to the Triple Door.

4. Sixteen boxes of porn.

5. Band t-shirts.

6. A signed copy of the screenplay to Shortbus.

7. The So You Wanna Be Orson Welles package.

8. The Harvey Danger cover song.

9. The Pearl Jam lovers’ package.

and

10. The goddamned vespa.

The rest of the bidding stops in one hour.

From today’s Seattle Times:

One of the world’s top female high-altitude climbers, Seattle-based Christine Boskoff, is presumed missing in the unclimbed 20,000-foot peaks in Southwest China…

Boskoff has ascended six of the world’s 26,000-foot peaks, including Mount Everest. She owns Mountain Madness, a Seattle adventure-travel company formerly owned by Scott Fischer, one of the guides who died on Mount Everest in the 1996 season recounted in Jon Krakauer’s best-selling book “Into Thin Air.”

Boskoff and her husband bought Mountain Madness in 1997, just months after founder Fischer died on Everest. Two years later, Boskoff’s husband died.

Clearly Mountain Madness is cursed—it’s the freakin’ Hope Diamond of adventure-travel companies.

Sims sets the record straight: Gregoire never looked at the People’s Waterfront Coalition option. WSDOT simply looked at a six-lane option to accomodate cars cars cars… without considering that people ride cars … and people can take transit. Anyway, here’s Sims’s statement:

Sims statement on Gov. Gregoire’s call for a vote on the Viaduct

“Governor Gregoire’s announcement today that the public should vote between two Viaduct replacement options — a tunnel or a rebuild — is too limited. While I can support the idea of a public vote, and strongly prefer the tunnel over the rebuild, I disagree with the governor’s call for excluding a surface-boulevard-plus-transit option from public consideration.

“That option, which could potentially open up the waterfront while providing an affordable, environmentally friendly means of moving traffic through the city, has not yet been studied. The surface option that WSDOT briefly examined contained no transit element and bears little resemblance to what surface-transit advocates are proposing.

“If we are going to position Seattle as a vibrant world-class 21st century metropolis, we need to proceed with boldness and vision. We need to think beyond present-day categories, with an eye to the long-term. How we decide on the Viaduct today is a profound test of our commitment to a better, more enlightened future. The right sort of transit-friendly surface proposal could meet that test.â€�

Off the Charts: Pot convict to serve 55 years.

Off the Hook: Court drops charges for 32,524 pot plants.

Off the Record: Taiwanese actors admit to high times.

Take the Plunge: New Jersey legislature approves needle exchange program.

Take Two: San Diego County appeals in attempt to overturn CA medical marijuana law.

Best Brownies Ever: Belgium sows pot plantation.

Ask Your Doctor: Drug ads may not be right for you.

Gregoire has set up a rigged vote.

Here’s what she has said about the two options she wants to put before the voters:

The finance plan for the Elevated Structure Alternative project as described in the draft environmental impact statement (DEIS) is “feasible and sufficientâ€� to complete the project;

The finance plan for the Tunnel Alternative as described in the DEIS is not “feasible and sufficientâ€� to complete the project.

Well, okay. So why vote on the tunnel option at all?

If the only feasible option right now is the re-build, let’s just have an up or down vote on that. Pitting the re-build against a project without feasible or sufficient funding is like asking someone who’s got $6 in their wallet if they’d rather go to Dick’s or Black Bottle in Belltown. It’s not a meaningful question.

Of course, since there’s no funding for the tunnel, people are going to choose the re-build. But is that really their choice? The fairer question is: Do they want the re-build? Yay or Nay?

In other words, there are other things we can do besides the tunnel and the re-build. But since the only one that is feasible right now is the re-build, let’s figure out if we want that—without landing there by default in a rigged vote.

The Governor never actually studied a real surface/transit option. The WSDOT studies prioritized moving cars rather than people, and so, never looked at divvying capacity up into cars and transit.

Yes, it’s a lot of ducats, but $844 seems LOW for dinner for six (plus copious excellent wine!) made at your own goddamn home by god-among-chefs Ethan Stowell of mother-fucking-great Union! Plus: Ethan is really funny and cool. Everybody hearts Ethan! If you’re a rich person with a mouth and brain, or you know such a person, get on it, fool!

I’m depressed. Our talented art director, Corianton Hale, is leaving. And the surface/transit option has been tabled by the governor.

But still, it’s Friday: Dig the important teenage sound:

Anything that you wanna do, anyplace that you wanna go
Don’t need permission for everything that you want
Any taste that you feel is right
Wear any clothes just as long as they’re bright
Say what you want, ‘cos this is a new art school
Do what you want if it takes your mind
Better do it now, ‘cos you won’t have time
And never worry if people laugh at you
The fools only laugh ‘cos they envy you
Time is motion and the hands are fast
Young words are mumbled, they don’t always last
It’s up to us to be sure they understand
Who makes the rules that make people select
Who is to judge that your ways are correct
The media as watchdog is absolute shit
The TV telling you what to think
Anything that you wanna do, anyplace that you wanna go
Don’t need permission for everything that you want
Any taste that you feel is right
Wear any clothes just as long as they’re bright
Say what you want,
‘cos this is a new art school
Do what you want, ‘cos this is the new art school

Editor: I see that our wonderful mayor, having been repudiated by a public referendum concerning his vendetta against RickÂ’s Nightclub (Dec. 15th) has decided to go ahead and make it a personal attack (along with Chief Gil) against the club.
Now, I may be wrong, but there seem to be a lot more URGENT areas of crime in the city that need attention. I wonÂ’t get knifed or mugged in RickÂ’s. Try walking through Pioneer Square, the U-District, Belltown (etc… need I continue?) at night (heck—-in the day!) and see how safe you feel.
Sixteen officers spent many hours with the dancers hours that could be spent watching our streets.
I have been asking the MayorÂ’s office for more police in this city. We get 31 more this year! Based on our population, Seattle is one of the least represented in police staffing in the nation! And the mayor thinks thatÂ’s all right!
Do I care what is happening in Rick’s? NO. It’s between two consenting adults. What I do care about is walking the streets in safety! Arson in the U-District, drug dealers along “the Ave” allowed to prosper (the only time I have witnessed a cleanup is when the Sheriff’s Department arrived); drug deals in full view in Pioneer Square.
The NUMBER ONE CONCERN the mayor should have for Seattle is the safety of its people. And that is blatantly not occurring!
There is an International website that shows that the University District is the best location to buy drugs in Seattle. Note this website showing crime in Seattle. And the mayor says we need no more police!
The mayor’s phone number is (206) 684-4000. Please call him and let him know that you won’t stand for his repudiation of your vote and that we need more police to actually PROTECT the people of Seattle rather than play “granny” with our nightclubs!
John

Um, I’m just going to point out that there are only three hours left in the Strangercrombie bidding and the So You Wanna Be a Writer package is only at $187.50. Gary Shteyngart, one of the, I dunno, five or six writers in America whose books are both praised to the skies by the literary establishment and bestsellers? He’s like our Amis, or our Zadie Smith, or Amis and Smith stirred together, covered in butter, and baked in a piroshki. He’ll read your short story (or 3,000 words of your novel) and give you his feedback—in writing! (Which writing itself is worth something!) Plus, a free class at Richard Hugo House, maybe Lyall Bush’s upcoming one on Joyce? Plus a gift certificate to Epilogue Books? Plus a CD of literaryish sea shanties? Plus a case of Solaris wine, to drink yourself to death with?

(You don’t know who Shteynhart is? You don’t read The New Yorker? OK, here’s the New York Times describing Shteyngart’s latest novel as “burstingly sure of its barbaric excellence.” Here is Shteyngart giving a reading and talk at The New Yorker festival two months ago. Here he is in an interview talking about the best novel he’s read in a long time—The Sopranos on HBO. “It’s amazing. It’s like Flaubert or something…except it’s obviously a television series.”)

Anyway, there is no greater gift in the world for that aspiring-writer-who-has-everything on your list. Or for yourself. And right now it’s cheap. Just sayin’.

This blood:

Belongs to this bird:

The bird is, as you can see, no more. It is a dead thing. It’s murderer is not the windstorm but a hawk that wanted to make a quick meal of it. For reasons that will forever remain, like death, a mystery, the hawk changed its mind and dumped its kill on the sidewalk. Because the hawk is picky, the pigeon is now garbage. The leaves around it are also dead. The clouds above are thick and slow. And somewhere deep in the universe there is an orb of ice with a crack in it. That crack creaks now and then. Also deep in space there is a star the size of Manhattan. That star is alone and glows for nothing.

A few snaps from Lakeview Cemetery…

And another and another.

Sadly it doesn’t look like any bodies popped out of the ground.

It’s true… as I type I am surrounded by towers of comic and art books, archived work discs, and empty bottles of Talisker. Six years worth of wonderful memories. Today is my last day: I am leaving to turn my freelance work into a career, and passing the torch to two fantastic and enthusiastic designers: Aaron Huffman (our new Art Director) and Aaron Edge (our new Design Director). It’s been an incredible run. Here’s to the reign of the Aarons.

When you’re here, you’re family—nauseated, puking, shitting, vomiting, feverish family!

The Chinese river dolphin, also known as the baiji (白鱀豚), also known as the Goddess of the Yangtze (長江女神), has been declared extinct. It is the first major aquatic mammal to go the way of the dodo since the Caribbean monk seal (hunted to death) in 1932. Scientists blame hunting, ship traffic, and the Three Gorges Dam.

The last known sighting, of a stranded dead baiji, was in 2004.

Gov. Christing Gregoire says Seattle voters should choose between the tunnel and the rebuild. She takes the boulevard option off the table.

And, in her press release, she gives a little shout out to Team Nickels:

The finance plan for the Tunnel Alternative as described in the DEIS is not “feasible and sufficientâ€� to complete the project.

This uninspired decision from Gregoire shows a jaw-dropping lack of leadership. She’s too worried that a real recommendation would have alienated voters, both in Seattle and statewide.

Let the chess games begin.

(HILARITY) Roscoe is a boy inventor straight out of an Encyclopedia Brown book. His dog Scampers can talk. The two of them upset history by drunkenly driving a Timecycle through the past, accidentally killing Abe Lincoln, and causing a randy zebra to bugger the baby Jesus to death. It’s horrible; it’s wonderful. (Theatre Off Jackson, 409 Seventh Ave S, 800-838-3006. 8 pm, $14.) BRENDAN KILEY

We’ve heard that numerous trees are down in Volunteer Park. Here’s a picture someone sent in…

We’ve also heard that numerous large trees were uprooted last night in the graveyard next to Volunteer Park. Lakeview Cemetary is home to numerous deceased Blethens and Nordstoms, along with the earthly remains of Bruce and Brandon Lee. If you’re passing by Lakeview Cemetery today and have a moment, feel free to send us pictures of any coffins or corpses that were popped out of the ground by the massive root balls of any massive trees brought down in last night’s storm.

The hotly anticipated film adaptation of Alan Bennett’s The History Boys is here, complete with sexy boys (and one fat one), skinny ties (and one bow one), and a soundtrack full of New Wave classics (and two quavery renditions of “Bewitched, Bothered, and Bewildered”). Performance editor Brendan Kiley makes the audacious claim that “the best movie of the year is actually a play.” How very heterosexual of you, Brendan.

Charlotte’s Web is opening this week, and while it isn’t a perfect movie, it does feature the adorable illustrations of Seattle artist and Stranger illustrator Kathryn Rathke. Here is one of her sheep:

Or perhaps you’d prefer the tragic tale of a Christian indie rocker overtaken by his glamorous protegé Sufjan Stevens. (By bizarre coincidence, Stranger news reporter Angela Valdez is featured in this documentary interviewing Stevens. You may not recognize her, however; Angela describes this phase of her life as the time “before I learned to be a girl.”) Sean Nelson loves Danielson: A Family Movie to pieces here. (Plays at Northwest Film Forum for one week only.)

The final installment of Northwest Film Forum’s Béla Tarr series is Werckmeister Harmonies, a strange and wonderful fake allegory about a prince and a whale and the stars. Very beautiful. It plays through Sunday.

Also opening: The kiddie fantasy movie Eragon (bleh, says Andrew Wright); Will Smith and his cute son Jaden in The Pursuit of Happyness (bleh, says Brendan); and Unknown (nifty (scroll down), says Andrew Wright).

_______________________

Check out even more reviews in The Stranger’s Film Shorts, including the amusing Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds (I feel dirty just typing that), It’s a Wonderful Life, and Santa Smokes.

And as always, our carefully compiled, lovingly updated Movie Times. You should probably call ahead to make sure the theater has power.

Only 5 more hours! Put on your drunky-pants and let’s go dancing! You get sh*t-canned, and I, Kelly O, will show up at the bar of your choice and take your picture for January 25th issue. I’ll buy the first round—the money you spend on the auction goes to charity. Make your Momma proud. Like these guys. Or this guy. Heh, remember this guy? Tori Spelling is a former Drunk of the Week. So am I. So is this girl, this girl, and these girls. Go bid now!

Last night I braved the deluge to attend the public hearing on the citywide skatepark plan, which proposes 26 new skatepark sites around Seattle (check out the map here). Getting to the meeting was an adventure itself. I love riding the buses during crazy weather — remember when it was snowing and you could tell everyone on the bus is just thinking, “Snow!” — and last night’s ride involved a couple belting “Can You Feel the Love Tonight?” at the crowded stop and, later, the driver pulling the fuckin’ ballsiest bus driver move ever: pulling around a line of stopped cars at the corner of Pine and Boren and roaring through the intersection past a stalled car (“Ye-ah!” said a man from Oklahoma up in front, “I like this driver!” and everyone on the bus cheered).

The meeting, though… much less exciting than the trip to the meeting. People showed up as early as 5PM to sign up to speak in front of the Board of Parks Commissioners, who will evaluate the plan and vote yah or nay on January 11th. The skatepark portion of the meeting didn’t actually start till 7:15 and I’m impressed with anyone who has the physical and mental strength to sit through over an hour of mind-numblingly dull Parks presentations just to express their feelings for three measly minutes. The room, in the basement of the grand Town Hall, felt mostly deserted, with only 31 people occupying the many rows of chairs, accompanied by the constant thumping of some Northwest School pageant taking place overhead.

Susanne Friedman, the Project Manager, noted that over 700 citizens made comments on the project during its conception and the City has “heard very clearly from the public that there is a need for skate parks.” She also presented skating as a rather innocuous Martha Stewart-esque pastime, describing skatedots as “little elements peppered throughout the City… such as a whimsical bench or chair.”

Nineteen people gave testimony in total, with several skaters — most of them older — thanking the Parks Dept for all their work in creating safe places for kids to skate.

The main opposition to the plan is neighbors who are upset about possibly losing green space to the cement skate parks. While the Skatepark Taskforce prioritized sites that are already covered in asphalt of cement, several parks are slated to be built on what is now grassy open land. Neighbors from Genesse Park showed up to say that they’d formed a 30-family neighborhood association in response to concerns about the planned district skatepark which would occupy up to 30,000 square feet of green space. The group pointed out that the Taskforce has been using somewhat shaky numbers to assess the demand of skating in Seattle — there’s been no actual count of skaters in the city, instead the project’s been estimating the number of Seattle skaters by extrapolating from national figures.

The Parks Board seemed excited overall (“In another life, I’ll be thin and a skater,” said Commissioner Ramels) and definitely committed to building skate facilities. They’re concerned though, too, about green space and how the parks’ cement will affect storm water at the sites. They’ll keep reviewing and take a vote January 11th.

The bidding ends today!

All those packages, all for charity:

VIP passes to Bumbershoot, Block Party, Sasquatch, and more!

A high culture package with a wine and cheese tasting party and tickets to the opera and ballet!

The Shortbus screenplay, signed by John Cameron Mitchell (plus 123 Shortbuscondoms).

The Stranger distro team helps you move!

Shove your foot in the door of rock stardom by getting the big shots at Barsuk and Sub Pop to listen to your demo!

A crazy party in gold with Ben Exworthy!

Ticket packages to On the Boards and the Washington Ensemble Theatre, with a backstage tours and drinks with the artists!

A birthday bash with the Rat City Rollergirls!

Hugh Foskett and a wall of beer!

Beautiful furniture!

Food! Boat rides! Romance! Sex! A basketball game with Sherman Alexie! Rare autographed posters! Fancy threads! More!

There are still heaps of deals and steals—and it all ends today at 5 pm.

Go! Bid! Buy!

Both Seattle dailies are publishing exclusively online today, but it’s not some bold experiment relating to the future of journalism.

Bothell, where both newspapers are printed on presses owned by the Seattle Times Company, apparently lost power last night during the print run, leaving the Times with a measly 13,000 printed copies that it says it’s sending to downtown Seattle and Bellevue.

All of which points out that in the paperless newspaper future, if indeed it’s coming, an Achilles’ heel in the mode of production will remain the same: the need for copious amounts of electricity.

You can’t print a newspaper without power. And an online newspaper doesn’t work so well when 1 million potential readers can’t turn on their computers.

Here’s what $139.26 gets a motivated scavenger at the just-about-dead Tower Records on lower Queen Anne, where all records are 70% off, all hip-hop records are $1, and all DVDs are 60% off. Tons of local stuff (the slightly sad consequence of Tower’s having been a national chain that seemed inordinately committed to selling releases by local/regional artists among its vast catalog, perhaps to its detriment in the end) and a fair amount of weirdo imports remain.

Though I’ve been hearing rumors of its imminent dissolution for almost 10 years, the fact that Tower is actually closing does seem kind of sad. Still, I can’t get too emotional about the passing of a big chain like this, however much better it was than most of the others, and however much time I have spent in its aisles over the years (as a teenager in Nashville, I had almost no other options—Tower was my Sonic Boom/Easy Street/Scarecrow Video; that doesn’t make it Sonic Boom or Easy Street or Scarecrow, which is part of why I moved to Seattle to begin with…).

For more heartfelt ruminations on Tower’s collapse, read this piece by a soon-to-be-erstwhile TR (not Teddy Roosevelt) employee who is also a really smart, funny bloggournalist, and also this one, by the great Ann Powers (the best!), who references the very location whose bones I was picking just last night while the great storm of ought-six raged outside.

Now then:

Brand Nubian-Best of
Scritti Politti-The Boom Boom Bap (single)
Bonnie Prince Billy-Cursed Sleep (single)
Graham Coxon-You and I (import single)
Graham Coxon-Standing On My Own Again (import single)
Paul Williams-Someday Man (Japanese import)
Bob Dylan-Masked and Anonymous Soundtrack
Lee Hazlewood-The Cowboy and the Lady
V/A-Reaching For the Best Northern Soul compilation
Damien Jurado-Postcards and Audio Letters
King Kong-The Big Bang
Alan Price-A Price on His Head
People’s Choice-Golden Classics
V/A-Sur La Mer Samp-Le-Mer (5RC compilation)
Spoon-Loveways EP
Gary Reynolds and the Brides of Obscurity-Instant Happiness
Screaming Lord Sutch-Hands of Jack the Ripper
Sea of Love Soundtrack (notable for Tom Waits version of title song)
Thee Emergency-Can You Dig It?
Mark Pickerel and His Praying Hands-Snake in the Radio (already own it, bought as a gift)
Psapp-Tiger, My Friend
Danielson-Ships
Steve Turner and His Bad Ideas-s/t
The Gossip-That’s Not What I Heard
Laura Veirs-The Triumphs and Travails of Orphan Mae
v/a-Angel of Ashes (Scott Walker Tribute)
Sandie Shaw-Puppet on a String
Sparks-Sparks
Beastie Boys-Ill Communication (I’ve never liked this album, but for $2 I’ll try again)
Afrika Bambaataa-Beware (The Funk is Everywhere)
Goldie Lookin Chain-s/t
DVD
Friends and Crocodiles (BBC)
My Name is Bill W (James Woods is incredible in this movie!!!)
Gangster Number One

I probably wouldn’t have bought a lot of these had they not been so drastically marked down (Paul Williams is an obvious exception), but then, I probably wouldn’t have been there if Tower wasn’t going out of business, so, as my erstwhile colleague Josh Feit might say, burn on everybody.

I challenge the New York Times/CNN/Associated Press to match the sort of military expertise Fox News routinely provides its viewers.

(Via Think Progress.)

Heavy rain in Scotland.

Heavy rain in Florida.

Freezing rain in Moose Jaw.

Sewage-liberating rain in Salem.

Heavy rain in Qatar.

In much, much drier news: The winner of the 2006 Grandma’s Marathon was disqualified after testing positive for anabolic steroids.

(Sadly, Grandma’s Marathon is not so named because one must be a grandma to enter, but because it’s sponsored by Grandma’s Saloon and Grill in Duluth, MN. Can someone get working on a grandmother-only marathon please? And find a wizened old cheater so the headline “Grandma’s Marathon Runner Disqualified for Steroid Use” will have a proper payoff?)

We’re very concerned here at Slog’s GOTV efforts about the effects of last night’s storm. Bad weather—to say nothing of impassible roads, power outages, and deaths—can seriously depress voter turnout. So, please, if you know someone that hasn’t voted yet, or is without power, do what you can to get them to the polls.

Because it’s round two of Capitol Hill Seattle’s referendum. In this round Slog is pitted against ShopRite. Yesterday at 4 PM ShopRite was freakin’ creaming us—but by 5 PM our GOTV efforts had reversed the trend and Slog took a commanding lead. But it’s not over until it’s over and the polls are open until late tonight. So click here to vote!

Vote Slog!

UPDATE: Er, it seems that the polls closed last night—accidentally. So we’ve already won this round…

Mother Nature: Three dead and one million without power following yesterday’s storm.

Homos: New Jersey legislature votes to recognize same-sex civil unions.

Iraq: The Bush administration says it’s not interested in talking to Iran and Syria. John Kerry, however, is.

Senate: Senator Tim Johnson remains in stable condition. Fox News remains disappointed.

Hikers: Yesterday’s storm certainly didn’t help in the search for missing hikers on Mt. Hood.

Money: The Dow hit a new record yesterday.

Missing Laptop: The Boeing employee who lost a company computer containing information on 400,000 employees has been fired.

Bad Pasta: More than 160 people get sick after eating at an Olive Garden in Indianapolis.

Seahawks: Fuck.

So it looks like we had a windstorm, SeaTac Airport closed down, no one has power, a woman drowned in her own basement. (!!!!!) Am I a terrible person for waking up this morning most concerned about South Dakota’s ailing Democratic senator?

Yup.

He’s doing better, according to reports.

Senator Tim Johnson, Democrat of South Dakota, was said to be in critical condition but “responsiveâ€� Thursday after an operation to stop bleeding in his brain, and Democrats declared that his condition would not imperil the narrow majority they will carry into the Senate next month.

The attending physician of the Capitol, Adm. John F. Eisold, who examined Mr. Johnson before he was sent to the hospital Wednesday, said the bleeding was caused by a rare tangling of the blood vessels in the brain, known as a congenital arteriovenous malformation, that physicians say often goes undetected. The operation successfully drained the blood and stabilized the problem, Admiral Eisold said in a statement released by Mr. Johnson’s office.

“He has been appropriately responsive to both word and touch,â€� Admiral Eisold said. “No further surgical intervention has been required.â€�

Because someone’s willing to pay at least $300 to be Drunk of the Week.

(Bidding ends tomorrow, Friday December 15, at 5:00 pm. If God exists, He’ll make sure the Buy Drunk of the Week package goes for no less than $595.)

Seattle woman dies after being trapped in flooded basement

A Seattle woman died after spending eight minutes in rising water after she became trapped in her basement while the room flooded, according the Seattle Fire Department.

The woman was stuck in the windowless utility room of her home in the 500 block of 30th Avenue East after floodwaters blocked the only door out and the water inched toward the ceiling, spokeswoman Helen Fitzpatrick said.

Firefighters pulled the woman out at about 5:30 p.m. by cutting a hole in the floor of the room above and pulling her through the ceiling of the basement.

Medics began CPR after the woman was rescued. She was transported to Harborview Medical Center, Fitzpatrick said. She died later Thursday evening.

(Thanks, Bob Geldof!)

It’s Christmastime
There’s no need to be afraid
At Christmastime, we let in light and we banish shade
And in our world of plenty we can spread a smile of joy
Throw your arms around the world at Christmastime

But say a prayer

Pray for the other ones
At Christmastime it’s hard, but when you’re having fun
There’s a world outside your window
And it’s a world of dread and fear
Where the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears
And the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging
chimes of doom
Well tonight thank God it’s them instead of you

And there won’t be snow in Africa this Christmastime
The greatest gift they’ll get this year is life
(Oooh) Where nothing ever grows
No rain nor rivers flow
Do they know it’s Christmastime at all?

(Here’s to you) raise a glass for everyone
(Here’s to them) underneath that burning sun
Do they know it’s Christmastime at all?

Feed the world
Feed the world

Feed the world

Let them know it’s Christmastime again

Feed the world
Let them know it’s Christmastime again

Russ sent this picture from Kirkland…

And, uh, this one…

I just returned from a canceled PTSA meeting at Thurgood Marshall Elementary in Judkins Park, where the most exciting agenda item concerned the new liquor license application from Casuelitas Island Soul, a nearby restaurant that’s been trying to sell a little beer and wine with their spicy vittles. Co-owner Theo Martin first applied early this year only to have his license rejected by the board because of the school’s opposition—mainly from principal Winifred Todd. Since then, Martin, who grew up in Judkins Park, has been rallying the support of his neighbors, who think a nice restaurant serving alcohol would not produce hoards of marauding drunks. They actually think it might be a good social anchor for the community. Martin has reapplied and, last week, asked the liquor board for a formal review of his case. I managed to corner Todd for about five seconds at the school and asked her if she would share with me her point of view. She said “I have no point of view,” and directed me to talk to the school district’s legal office.

It was too dark for my cell phone camera to get a shot of the car that’s submerged (!!) at Denny and 10th, but here’s another pic from 23rd & Republican—where a giant oak tree came crashing down on a van:

Like, Savage said: If you’ve got pics of the storm and its aftermath send them to press@thestranger.com or editor@thestranger.com, and we’ll post ‘em. Be sure to send the details too.

The weather outside is frightful. The photo above is of a tree that fell on a van at 23rd & Republican. No one was hurt, says our eyewitness. But it was close.

Downed trees, lights flickering, flooded streets—it’s been a shitty afternoon and it’s shaping up to be an even shittier night. Got a picture or a harrowing story to share? Did you suffer a weather-related near-death experience? Send pictures to editor@thestranger.com—and, if you can, CC josh@thestranger.com, eli@thestranger.com, and smirk@thestranger.com—and we’ll toss ‘em up on the Slog.

Brian writes…

Yet another reminder of our need for a distributed, diverse, modern and robust transportation system: I submit to you a few pictures I took of the absolute goddamn mess that was Mercer (under Aurora) and Aurora southbound this evening. My apologies for having a digital camera that lacks a floodlamp for a flash.

For a larger version of Brian’s picture, click here. Brian continues…

Thankfully, I walk to and from work, and didn’t have to do more than gawk at this scene with my fellow pedestrians. The scene was truly bizarre, one canal floating along in a concrete trough directly above another canal, both with several drowned cars stranded in water up to their windows. I imagine that the cars stuck on Mercer were overwhelmed by a torrent as they idled in rush-hour traffic, although I wasn’t present at the time of their drowning to say for sure. If this is what Mercer and Aurora looked like, I can’t help but think that other roadways around area were similarly affected.

The question: what happens to a city’s transportation infrastructure when a torrential downpour completely disables two of its most critical arteries at the beginning of rush hour?

The answer, of course, is that it shuts down, and becomes a freaking catastrophe. We’re boxing ourselves into a corner, brick by brick, with every home and road we build in the suburbs and every townhouse or condo we build in the city limits, all the while encouraging this development without first providing adequate transportation alternatives to ensure that extreme weather events such as today’s storm don’t have such disastrous affects. God forbid we should have a “serious” emergency, like a 9.0 earthquake. I don’t even want to think about how fucked we would all be then. When will the city of Seattle, its fellow communities and the Puget Sound basin as a whole finally pull their heads out of their collective asses and agree to a) limit development outside of already-developed areas and b) provide fast, convenient and comprehensive mass transit options designed to maintain service even during extreme weather or other emergencies?

Oh my God! It’s Round Two of Capitol Hill Seattle’s, uh, election or something, and Slog is pitted against Shoprite—and Shoprite is freakin’ creaming us! Click here to vote! Vote Slog! Get us in to round three of… whatever this thing is. We may not know what it’s about—we not sure CHS knows what it’s about—but we know we wanna win. And do you know why we wanna win? Because a victory for Shoprite would embolden terrorists everywhere. I mean, it’s no accident that we haven’t been hit since Slog triumphed over CHS and a little kitten in the last election.

So keep America safe! Vote Slog!

…and build an ark. Look out the window. It’s raining. It’s really, really raining. The streets are flooded, people crossing the street are up to their knees in water, it’s impossible to get a cab, coats and sticks and small dogs are floating by.

Rumors from downtown say it’s “totally flooded and gridlocked.” There are several inches of water in the streets—cars are stalled and pedestrians, unable to ford the crosswalks, are crossing in the middle of the road. (You’d think all the excess water would fall off the edge of the city into the sound, right? Or does it not work that way?)

And it’s going to keep raining. If you look to the column on the right, you will see life is, and will continue to be, “uncomfortable.”

(Or, barring an ark, bid on this.)

We’ve all been watching things get worse and worse outside the windows at the office here. Kelly O just tried to take a picture of the river running down the side of Pine Street, but it wasn’t very representative, so watch this instead:

From a confidential source: The dough boys and girls at the downtown Top Pot occasionally make donut holes, which the counter staff eat with cinnamon and sugar and do not share — even for a profit — with us longing consumers. Donut holes are almost as good as small, individually wrapped chocolates in their ability to make you feel like you’re not being as sinful as you actually are because you just ate 10 of them.