News Red Alert! WalMart Endangered by Gay Conspiracy!
posted by on November 21 at 12:24 PM
From the people who brought you Operation Rescue and Operation Save America comes a new work: Save WalMart!.
Yes, yes, yes, the abortion clinic harassing campaign — they’re the people who sit outside clinics snapping photos of every car in the parking lot — is getting a little weary (“Operation Rescue has never been tied to a violent crime! - NOT ONE!!” the website defensively declares) so now the reliable wingnuts are fueling their hero fantasies by protecting America’s largest employer from the demands of “diversity.”
They are being forced by the “politically correct” dogma (abortion, homosexuality, etc) of our day to accept his terms. If one chooses to defy this dogma, he will be forever branded as a right-wing, bigoted fascist, bent on forcing his own religion (Christianity) down everyone else’s throat.Now Satan has Wal-Mart in his line of fire! This legacy of faith and love for Jesus Christ by Mr. Walton is being trashed before our very eyes!
After being lambasted for years by the anti-family, pro-abortion, pro-homosexual, radical environmental left, Wal-Mart has finally succumbed to this constant harassment and blackmail. She has now chosen a policy of appeasement to assuage all of the false accusations leveled against her in hopes that the devil will somehow stop being so mean. It is sad to say that Wal-Mart has joined the The National Gay & Lesbian, Chamber of Commerce.
Their last stand for Freedom takes place the day after Thanksgiving, when Operation Save WalMart promises to deploy to 300 store locations. At their website, activists and snickering liberals can download fliers like:
The website doesn’t list the 300 WalMart locations, however, and they haven’t sent anything to their mailing list recently (of course I’m a member!) so I’m skeptical they’ll actually see the turn out they’re hyping. In any case, right wingers screaming about sodomy at families walking into WalMart on November 24th will be an exciting little vacation from all typical Christmas carolers.
It's nice to know that Jesus smiles on worker exploitation, including sex slavery and forced abortions on the Marianas islands.
So, wait, lemme see if I understand this: it wasn't Satan's influence that caused Wal-Mart to treat their employees like slaves, drive their competitors out of business, bully their suppliers into bankruptcy, and deal with regimes whose human rights record is only marginally better than Pol Pot's. But it IS Satan's influence that causes a global multinational to not want to ignore the shopping dollars of 10-20% of the population?
I'm so confused. I could SWEAR that Christ denounced greed, not homosexuality...their Bibles must have a different New Testament from mine.
I want a "Wal-Mart Supports Sodomy" t-shirt!!!
On the back it can say, "and so do I" with a smiling happy face.
Oh, and everyone's known for years that Wal-Mart supports sodomizing their suppliers and employees.
I really can't figure out why they have decided that this particular global multinational deserves their "help" to be "saved" - I'm trying to picture a similar "Save IBM" or "Save Ford" campaign. What is it about Wal-Mart that makes these people think that particular corporation is in possession of some sort of soul?!
Man, I LOVE referring to Wal-Mart as "she." Can we all start doing that regularly?
Did you hear about Wal-Mart? She is having a sale on tube socks!
OMG I laughed when I saw that flier.
UNREAL.
What department is sodomy in? I'm guessing Sundries.
That Jesus is one hate-filled dude, I gather.
That graphic is amazing. Looks like it's the first time for Mr. Happyface.
Give me a break. When given a choice between cheap electronics and supporting "Christian" values, Americans will always pick the electronics.
And I am so tired of the term "politically correct". It's used on both the right and the left, and it's just shorthand for people who are too stupid to come up with a reasoned arguement.
Elswinger: Sodomy is between the brooms and Rubbermaid.
I think we that are *of the homosexual persuasion* should all download those signs and *take over* the campaign. I think I could be Wal-Mart's bestest buddy since Frank Chopp.
I like the flier that says "Wal-Mart Betrayed Jesus Christ!"
Yeah! Judas was framed by the corporatocracy!
Sodomy at Walmart can be found in the tool deparment. Depending on power needs, the econo sized sodomy can usally be found above the pole diggers. The most powerful sodomy for 2007 can be found on the floor next to the wet/dry vacs.
But social conscience folks don't get there sodomy from Walmart anyways... the local, down-home sodomy as made by a Mom & Pop outfit using tradional methods and techniques is best. But, its always buyer beware when it comes to sodomy, isn't it?
Peanut Gallery- I would argue that the social conscience folks get their sodomy in secret, usually in places like the plant department where they can hide amongst the trees. Then again, if you're a preacher you should make sure a supply of meth is available... something that is usually found around a Wal-Mart, but not inside.
You can't even get 220-volt sodomy at Wal-Mart; for that you need to go to Sears.
Judas works over in Shoes. Ask him about boots.
Sodomy Blow Out Sale!
Boys pants, half off!
Now I'm laughing!
I'd go with Sears. I think they still carry Kenmore.
"Now Satan has Wal-Mart in his line of fire! This legacy of faith and love for Jesus Christ by Mr. Walton is being trashed before our very eyes!"
somebody do something before its too late!!
oh and i believe sodomy can be found in the employee lounge, near the paystubs.
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