When I lived in the dorms in college, we called this "Gay Privilege" -- gay couples could live together, but mixed-gender roommates weren't allowed. Ha ha, sucks to be straight.
Yeah, until your boyfriend winds up in the hospital. Or probate.
I'm a horny mother f-er, but I couldn't be hard up enough to wanna F someone in a public toilet stall. I'm no prude, but that's one I have never understood.
Next time you and Terry go to the M's, be sure to leave the son with the beer vendor.
Hopefully by next year our son will be the beer vendor. That boy has got to start earning his keep. Plus we don't want him wandering into the can while we're getting it on. Talk about trauma.
Ok, so it's legal for me to cruise the toilets in the park?
I argue that the trespassing charge is a violation of the "transgressor's" rights due to his sexual orientation...
Was the paralegal pregnant?
Actually, if the lines to the women's bathrooms are too long, it's legal for women to take over the men's bathroom if they believe it's unoccupied.
Perhaps he got confused?
Was the game THAT uninteresting?
Men can still take a pee if the stalls are occupied by those seeking sex. On the other hand, the women can't just pee in the sinks, and they don't have urinals - and they always have the same number of stalls as the men's room, which is retarded - so if people are getting it on in the hot, sexy confines of a dirty toilet stall, everyone else has to stand there hoping they're not about to wet their Levi's.
All public toilet sex must therefore take place in the horrible stanky men's room stalls.
In my moderate public-toilet-cleaning experience, it's the ladies who stank up their toilet stalls ten times worse than the gents do. Guys might tinkle around the edges and write on the walls, but the ladies, Jesus: SHIT on the walls, tampons on the floor, handles and seats broken off, clothing and entire rolls of toilet paper wedged halfway down the bend, hundreds of candy wrappers all around the throne. Fucking ANIMALS don't act like that.
But I do agree that holding up a really line so you can prong your partner of whatever persuasion should be a capital offense. Especially at one of the older stadiums like Fenway Park that only has one or two ladies' in the first place.
Sounds like I have at least one good reason to renew my M's season tickets!
Fnarf> public toilet cleaning? That demands elaboration.
I disagree, Fnarf. I did a college paper on graffiti, and as part of the research, had to note the differences between men and women's bathrooms.
If anything, men's bathrooms are consistently the worst.
Fnarf -- Spoken - accurately, I'll agree - by someone speaking from the perspective of former bartender/server?
I love the ladies and all their individual charms, but, yes, they are the worser public bathroom offenders.
I worked in a bookstore/coffeehouse/restaurant that shared bathrooms with a skanky meatmarket disco in a California suburb (Upstart Crow in the Pruneyard, Campbell, CA, anyone? Anyone?) for several years. The bathrooms were just impossible.
A dozen Pineapple-head Goths from the coffeehouse getting fucked up in the stalls, hilariously shitfaced hairspray girls smashing their drinks in the toilet and shitting on the walls (I still don't know how they did that), the constant fights (an angry disco dancer once threw his rival through our plate glass window, though that wasn't bathroom-related), the constant puking, the constant complaints from our more sedate patrons ("I don't know what it is, the walls are covered with brown stuff, I'm not going in there"), the assortment of non-waste products that were nightly flushed halfway down: it was fucking AWFUL, and I had to clean it up.
I also had a short fat guy in a leprechaun costume vomit a prodigious quantity of corned beef and green beer all down the front of my clothes one memorable St. Patricks Day, but that's a different story.
Will: graffiti wasn't in the top ten of problems we had. I wish.
"In my moderate public-toilet-cleaning experience ..." Moderation in the pursuit of public-toilet pronging is no vice; extremism in the trolling of public-toilet turd eating is no virtue.
& break it down for me, brother. If it's illegal for a testosterone-poisoned higher primate to enter a woman's stall, what's the penalty for a man who enters the all-the-above transsexual transgendered potty at Wm. H. Gates Legal Lawyers' Hall at the Dub campus?
Far be it from me to claim that women's bathrooms have any claim to a pristine nature - jeebus, I remember the old Frederick & Nelson women's rooms (what IS it that wealthy old ladies DO in department store toilets that smells so bad?!) - however, if you parse my original statement, it was that the men's rooms were horrible and stanky. Which they are. The women's rooms are not automatically the opposite...they too possess the very essence of stank.
However, men have more options for draining the lizard than women do, and that just makes it obvious that if the toilet stalls are going to be occupied by those bumping monkeys, it should be in the room where there are other options for micturation.
Then again, I HAVE peed in the urinal in porta-potties upon occasion, when the mere idea of lifting the lid was enough to cause automatic projectile-vomiting. (Bumbershoot on a 90 degree day, anyone?) It's a skill.
Dial it back 20 milligrams or so, bub.
My milligrams barb was directed at 20, not 21. Geni, I feel your pain. Women needing to use the restrooms in large venues are screwed -- uh, let me rephrase that -- get the shaft -- no, that's not good either -- are unfairly provided for. It's true.
I knew a gal once who could pee forty feet no problem. The demonstrations, where she destroyed a succession of cocky dickwavers in competition, were very popular out in the parking lot. it is a skill.
"(L)ifting the lid was enough to cause automatic projectile-vomiting ..."
It's the projectile farting you've got to watch out for. Just ask the confection called 'fnarf,' who was busted out of Betty Ford way too soon, & against medical advice.
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