Bill

We're not marrying because we don't want to and have no romanticized respect for the "institution" (which used to be some place people were locked into).

However, as the first anniversary moves to the fifth, to the tenth, and so on towards death, I think if it is not human nature, then it is still in the American's culture to look to a solid commitment, something both people can hold onto as making the relationship lasting, and more tangible then just a standard LTR. Something more then just "I Love You"; it could be wedding, buying a house, buying a car, getting a dog, getting a kid, something, any one thing, that can be pointed at and declared to be a substantial commitment. Sure, by real I mean to gesture to the family, to friends, to the world at-large to say “hands-off, eyes forward, WE, I & HIM/HER, ARE TOGETHER FOR THE LONG HAUL”.

My mom is living very nicely on my deceased Dad's pension and Social Security. In fact, she probably makes more money than the average family in the town she lives in. Which is great for her, and I applaud it.

When I think about the whole pension thing, it makes me really mad, so I try not to think about it, deciding to focus instead on my old age eating cat food if I outlive my partner.

The recently enacted Pension Protection Act of 2006 may allow your partner to name you as a beneficiary of his pension savings.

Alternatively, it may be possible to roll your partner's defined pension benefit plan savings into an IRA when he separates from service. If that is an option, he could name you as the IRA beneficiary and the problem could be mitigated.

He can find out if these options are available to him by contacting his HR department.

Hmm...somehow I don't see this argument convincing Ma and Pop out in Toppenish that the shackin' is okay.

Like somebody said upthread, I can see where it's more likely a bit of conviction and a bit of convenience. As you pointed out, even those couples can and do marry if they so desire.

So whenever I fill out those pesky surveys, I check the box that says "Married", not a "cohabiting" or "Shacked up" or "Domestic Partnership". And I know others do was well, even if they aren't legally married. So, some (small) percent of that 49.7% of married people is married gay folk.

Bottom line: it's not gay marriage; it's just marriage.

(Actually, I'd be quite happy with that, as long as the room was large and I had a balcony. A real balcony, none of this "Juliet" bullshit. Senior Citizen housing planners, please take note.)

Thanks for the tip, Andrew.

At last, something we agree on across the great divide of sports fan/sports-nonfan.

Bill

And Catalina, one way I've found to make investment seem less boring is to think about what it's actually accomplishing in the grander scheme of things. Investing money somewhere is exerting some control over how the world's productive effort is spent. At the level of personal investing, it's only a tiny bit of control compared to say, what a venture capitalist can do, but still, doing it responsibly can be considered a civic duty analogous to voting. Along those lines, I put my 401k in a fund that tracks the Calvert Social Index, which is an aggregation of the value of companies like the Dow, etc., but it excludes companies that have to do with weapons, tobacco, gambling, unfair labor practices, bad environmental records, and some other no-no's. So, I knew that the little bit of money I'm putting into the capitalist machine is used in a way that reflects how I think about the world.

love, annie

LOL at this section: "my free time was spent exposing hypocrisies."

That is awesome.

Your brain must be melting given the state of US society today -mine sure is.